(Minghui.org) I began practicing Falun Dafa three years ago, and the past year was a constant struggle to overcome an overwhelming feeling of sleepiness.
The last three months were particularly bad. I fell asleep as soon as I sat down for meditation. I didn't fare any better studying the Fa - I would doze off after reading only a few lines, and each time I would sleep for at least two hours.
I set more than ten alarm clocks, but still couldn't wake up for sending righteous thoughts at night time.
As I failed to study the Fa and do the exercises properly, my truth-clarification efforts were also ineffective.
I felt bad about myself, but my regret for not doing well gradually turned into apathy, and each day I was just going through the motions.
I asked myself every morning why I fell asleep again the night before during Fa-study or exercises. When I returned home from work in the evening, I stayed away from my desk for fear of dozing off once I sat down.
Then I had a terrifying dream a few days ago - I saw that I would lose my entire world and all the sentient beings there. The kind of desperation I felt in my dream defies description.
Still, I had trouble overcoming the sleepiness, even after the dream. It was the same old routine day after day.
Just when I felt hopeless, I suddenly remembered the Minghui articles I read at the beginning of my cultivation. Back then, I was often in awe of fellow practitioners who wrote to share their experiences of how they resisted and exposed the persecution. I admired them, as I felt that they were all cultivators on the divine path.
Then why did I feel so hopeless after only three years of cultivation? What was I afraid of? What I was going through was nothing compared to the tribulations that veteran practitioners discussed in their Minghui articles.
I'm already the happiest being in the universe because I've obtained the Fa. Didn't I make up my mind at the beginning of my cultivation that I would not give up the Fa for anything?
As soon as that thought flashed in my mind, I felt some pain in my belly and had a couple of bouts of diarrhea. That night, I didn't feel sleepy at all! I was able to meditate as normal and studied the Fa without the slightest feeling of sleepiness. I also felt my whole world brighten up all of a sudden and everything looked fresh and new. I knew that Master had done a lot for me in other dimensions. Thank you, Master!
I realized that the change resulted from me holding that righteous thought: I've obtained the Fa and am already the happiest being in the universe. Then what's there to be afraid of?
Now, I am able to cultivate as when I first started, and I truly cherish this precious cultivation state. Thank you, Master!
Category: Improving Oneself
