Seemingly Hopeless Life Revived after Practicing Falun Dafa
(Minghui.org) Many people who see me say that I look only 23 years old. When I tell them my real age, they are envious! In fact, I’m 35 years old! Why is it that I look so young?
I enjoyed consistently good health from a very young age. I also did well in school. Later in life, I had a good job and a happy marriage. I felt happy and lucky!
Due to my excellent performance record, the retail company I worked for promoted me to an important managerial position in 2005. At 25, I was the youngest of all the store managers.
I continued to do well, and within three months, my store’s sales volume increased more than one hundred thousand per month. That caught the attention of the company executives, who began to hold me in particularly high regard. They looked at me, a young girl, with respect and admiration. I became somewhat of a minor celebrity within the company, and the envy of many around me.
But then, at the peak of my career, my body started to deteriorate. I studied medicine and dealt with drugs every day, but I came down with some inexplicable illness. I felt very tired, my immunity was poor, and I caught colds easily and constantly.
My colleagues remarked, “You are sick 28 days out of every month!”
In time, I began to experience difficulty breathing. If I walked a bit fast, I became out of breath and felt almost like I was suffocating. When I walked up stairs to my apartment, I had to pause two or three times before I could get to my front door.
I knew medicine, so I dispensed my own medication. The problem was, I would get better and then relapse. I became more and more frustrated.
I went to the hospital to have a comprehensive check up, but no problems were found. So why was I in this condition? What was happening to me? I was very confused.
I still went to work every day, but also spent time seeking remedies. I also began to take many dietary supplements, but nothing helped.
In fact, I was getting worse. I couldn’t get a good night’s sleep. I couldn’t lie down, because if I did, I couldn’t breathe. I could only take naps propped up. I felt so bad in general that I wished I were dead.
My husband would often place his hand gently in front of my nose to see if I was breathing in the middle of the night, afraid to wake me because it was very difficult for me to fall asleep. He was very worried that I would stop breathing at any time.
Later, I could only sit on the edge of my bed or lie face-down on the bed to catch a little sleep. Even then, I often had difficulty falling asleep.
Sometimes when I struggled to breathe, I would make a loud noise in my throat and have difficulty catching my breath. If that happened, I had to go to the hospital and get an infusion immediately. The infusion was nothing but an emergency measure. In a few days, I was the same as before.
My complexion was dark and my lips were gray during this time. These were the manifestations of adverse reactions from the medications. I was tormented physical and mentally.
I lamented, “When will all this end? I am so young. I have a good family and a good job. Why am I so unlucky?”
I thought of suicide several times. I wanted to take sleeping pills to end my life and free myself from all my medical problems. But my survival instinct made me hesitate to kill myself.
I thought, “I am tortured by illnesses, and in such constant physical and mental anguish that I am a burden to my husband. He’s a good man. I don’t want to hurt him, to drag him down into this misery… But I really don’t want to die. I don’t want to leave my father and my mother. I don’t want to leave this world...”
Although my desire to live helped sustain me, it also put me in a quandary. I was in utter despair. Only someone who has endured a similar experience can possibly understand the pain in my heart and the difficult situation I was in.
I continued to drag the weary shell of my body around, day in, day out. In 2008, I finally made a decision to resign from my job.
I forced myself to think optimistically, “I’m just too tired from work. I’ll give myself a good rest. After a while, I’ll be as good as new.”
From then on, I stayed home and did practically nothing. I spent my days watching TV and taking naps, feeling useless. My life seemed not really worth living.
My husband prepared my daytime meals before leaving for work. When he came home, he fixed our evening meal, and washed the dishes.
Our apartment was on the second floor. For the first two weeks, I generally stayed put, because I became completely exhausted if I attempted to walk any distance. I was also afraid that others would be shocked by how sickly I looked. So I walked around a bit at home and sometimes sunned myself on our porch, feeling utterly helpless and hopeless.
One cool, fresh summer morning, I was still hazy with sleep and thought I heard the sound of children playing, someone talking, someone laughing. I thought I also heard birds singing outside on my porch. I involuntarily conjured up a beautiful picture. I got up slowly and walked out to the porch.
I looked up to see sunny blue sky. I looked down to see a mother frolicking with her child, and people talking. I couldn’t hold back my tears. I felt so sad.
I thought to myself, “Such warm sun, such fresh air, but I’m in here and can’t go out to enjoy it, or even breathe freely. What am I living for?”
I was truly desperate. Then a realization dawned on me. Life is the most precious thing, and the most precious thing in life is health. Nothing else matters.
Three months passed, and everything was the same. I didn’t do anything, and I didn’t go anywhere. On occasion, I let my husband take me out for a walk.
More than six months later, my husband urged me to start practicing Falun Dafa. The first time he asked me, I wasn't interested and didn’t listen.
I was thinking, “I feel so tired whenever I make the slightest movement. Falun Dafa exercises involve so many movements. There’s no way I can do them.”
My husband had been practicing Falun Dafa for more than ten years. It was an indisputable fact that I'd never seen him sick. For that I’d always been envious.
The second time my husband urged me to do the Falun Dafa exercises, he suggested that I try to do as much or as little as I could. Out of gratitude for his looking after me for so long, so well, so kindly, so patiently, and so thoughtfully, I finally relented.
I followed the music and did the first four exercises for one hour. I didn’t feel tired, although I did feel hot. I figured it was because the weather was quite warm.
Miraculously, that night I slept for the entire night, and did it lying down!
As I write this, I am still moved to tears. For so many days and nights, I could do nothing but sit, lean back, or lie on my stomach to get some rest. Being able to lie down and fall asleep had been only a dream for so long.
That night, I slept easily and soundly. My husband told me that my throat didn’t rattle, and I didn’t make a sound.
I was thoroughly shocked. Only one hour of exercises, but what a stunning difference that one hour of exercises made. No medicine or supplement had been able to achieve that.
After recovering from my initial shock, I asked my husband for all the books and writings by Master Li Hongzhi, Falun Dafa’s founder, because I was determined to cultivate Falun Dafa!
I read everything with feverish hunger, and began to understand the true meaning of life.
That was how, in September 2008, I embarked on the road to return to my original self.
I remind myself constantly to live according to Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance, to strive to be a better person and a moral person, and to always to think of others first.
Since I started practicing Falun Dafa, I’ve become healthy, both physically and mentally. My sicknesses are history. I’ve not been back to the hospital or needed any medications or supplements! I walk briskly! My skin is fair and rosy. I feel great!
I am full of hope every day, and give thanks to Falun Dafa and Master for granting me a second chance in life! There are no words to express my infinite gratitude.
Life is capricious. A person who has experienced death can truly cherish life. I hope you all can learn to distinguish between good and evil, right and wrong, and have a bright future.
With all my heart, I wish to say to you all and hope you all will remember, “Falun Dafa is good! Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance is good!”