Rationally Understanding the Attachment to Children
(Minghui.org) Recently, I have developed some understandings of the attachment to children, which I would like to share.
I love my child for many reasons: he is very pure, he has no selfish notions, and he has no sense of self in his heart. When others ask him for something, he gives it to them without hesitation, not even considering that he may never get it back. I like how he clings to me, I like being relied upon, and I enjoy having control over his life and thereby validating myself. I love him because I gave birth to him. In fact, these feelings are manifestations of my selfishness, and I have failed to respect him as an independent individual. Sometimes, I don't even want him to grow up, because it is a warm feeling having him cling to me all day. I suddenly realized that I was indulging in ordinary sentiments and enjoying the feelings of an everyday person: I was submerged in my emotions. As practitioners we know that each life has his own path and no one else can walk it for him. Not letting go of my child is not even realistic in the everyday world. I think this may be one of the reasons why some people in everyday society grow up physically mature but psychologically immature.
As practitioners we should be able to see through the delusion of our selfish notions. A practitioner is an altruistic being and a god in the new cosmos. We cannot keep any trace of the old cosmos and must eliminate the old cosmos' arrangement of selfishness inside us. I must remove the selfish thoughts of wanting my child to rely on me. To fulfill my role as a responsible parent, I must do everything I can to guide him to assimilate to Dafa's principles of Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance, and truly assist him by helping him to understand the truth of the cosmos. I should be responsible to him instead of using my love for him as an excuse to indulge my own selfishness. When I realized my feelings were manifestations of selfishness, I constantly reminded myself, and found it helpful in eliminating my attachment to children.
This is my shallow understanding that I wanted to share in order to initiate fellow practitioners' meaningful thoughts on this subject. Please point out anything improper. Heshi!