(Clearwisdom.net) A fellow practitioner came to visit me tonight. Since we have a good personal relationship, I have a lot of unnecessary chats with her. When she wanted to go home, I asked her to stay a little longer to talk more. We chatted about one practitioner's attachments, about how another practitioner clarifies the truth, about another practitioner's recent singing of Dafa songs at a wedding, and so on. After she left, I could feel clearly that my xinxing level had dropped. I realized after looking inward that I had not cultivated my xinxing.
I identified my weakness. I realized I often forget to cultivate xinxing when I am with people that I am friends with. When I am with everyday people or practitioners with whom I'm not particularly close, I can manage to keep my cultivation state steady and clearly remember that I must cultivate my xinxing; however, when I am with my best friends, close relatives, my father, husband, child, or everyday people who have lots of trust in me, I forget that I am a cultivator or find excuses from the Fa to cover up my attachments.
For example, I know we must cultivate speech; however when I am with my father, I tell a lot of jokes and say words belittling others to amuse him. Of course he laughs, but I do not maintain my xinxing.
A colleague of mine was divorced and lived in a difficult situation. I said some kind words to her to express my sympathy. She became friendly with me and often came to discuss some everyday people's topics such as how to find a good spouse, how to make money, and how to make life better. Out of my attachment to emotion—that is, if someone trusts me deeply I trusted her back in return—I talked a lot about everyday people's topics with her and even helped her find a job. It turned out that she quit the job after a week, and borrowed money from me to cover her cost of living. I realized later that I had been attached to self and emotion, and thought that since she trusted me so much I should pay her back. In fact, if the situation were measured with the Fa, it would be clear that this thought was completely from the standpoint of everyday people. As a cultivator, no matter how everyday people treat me or think of me, good or bad, my heart should remain unaffected. I should be kind to all people around me, and that is the compassion beyond ordinary people's standards. If one treats me well and I am good to him, but another one treats me badly and so I also treat him badly, that is not real compassion.
When I am with practitioners that I am friends with, I often forget to cultivate speech. I felt that if I did not tell them certain things it would show a lack of trust. As a result, everyone knew things that should not be spread. I used ordinary human standards of right or wrong to judge fellow practitioners' conflicts or be swayed by practitioners' human thoughts, rather than using the Fa to measure right or wrong. I realized that all this was caused by my attachment to self and being unable to rise above and beyond emotion.
Dafa disciples should not fall into this human relationship in everyday society. We should not be trapped in various human emotions; instead, we should treat everyone the same: responsibly and with rationality.
Only by letting go of the stubborn attachment to self, can our righteous thoughts be more powerful, can we rectify ourselves from every single thought, can we do the Three Things well and cultivate diligently on the Fa.
The above is my personal understanding. Please kindly point out anything inappropriate.
Category: Improving Oneself
