(Clearwisdom.net) During the process of clarifying the truth to people, I often quote talking points and examples from the Nine Commentaries on the Communist Party. I find that many people are quite receptive to them. Because of this, it is easier for me to persuade them to quit the Chinese Communist Party (CCP). Nevertheless, when I see some people who are deeply poisoned by the CCP propaganda, I often get into arguments with them. When this happens, my heart is usually moved and my tone becomes unsteady. Although I try to look within so that I can avoid such things from happening in the future, I don't seem to find anything. I end up looking outward for the problem.
There was one incident in which I learned a good lesson. Early in July 2009, I bumped into a distant relative who is a CCP member. Prior to seeing him, about a year ago, we had talked about the CCP. When I saw him this time, I said to myself: "I will clarify the truth to him thoroughly this time and hope that he will quit the evil party and choose a bright future for himself." At the beginning, our conversation went quite smoothly, but then he suddenly told me that early that year, his workplace organized a tour to Taiwan. When he was there, he was approached by some Falun Gong practitioners who wanted to give him a copy of the Nine Commentaries on the Communist Party. He said that not only did he not accept the book, he cursed at them. After he told me this story, I felt bad for him, thinking that those kindhearted practitioners approached him because they wanted to save him. He was not only poisoned by the evil party, but carried the poison over to Taiwan. He said that even his companions had tried to stop him from being so rude to others. I thought to myself: "I have got to hurry up and clarify the truth to him." Maybe because I was a bit too hasty, I ended up getting into an argument with him. I was affected by his attitude. I realized that we wouldn't get anywhere if we continued fighting with each other, so I stopped the conversation.
I reflected on the incident afterwards and tried to find out why I was so moved by him. I came to understand that the reason was because of the selfish notions I have formed from thousands of years, my attachments to validate myself, and the fact that I have been unknowingly poisoned by the evil party culture myself for decades. Growing up in such an environment, I was affected in almost every aspect of my thinking. Although there has been some rectification in my thought process due to my cultivation in Dafa, some of the CCP culture's elements were still manifesting subconsciously through my words and actions. I realized that when I was reading the Nine Commentaries, I was greatly biased because of the way I was brought up. On the surface, there is nothing wrong with having a better understanding of the Nine Commentaries in order to better expose the CCP. The key is that I didn't have strong righteous thoughts to eliminate the poison from the CCP that affected me. Imagine if a person's mind is poisoned by the CCP and then used to expose it, is the effect going to be good? From this, I could see that it is not hard to understand why I got into arguments easily with this relative. The negative effect that was created during this process was a big lesson for me.
Arguments often arise among practitioners, too. We often use ordinary principles, instead of the Fa, to judge who is right or wrong. Although I looked inward and found some attachments, the improvement was modest, as this had to do with other factors arranged by the old forces. Ultimately, in order to solve problems, studying the Fa well is the key. In the past, although I spent a lot of time studying the Fa, I didn't take it into my heart. Thus, studying the Fa with a calm, tranquil mind is the fundamental solution .
Three years ago, Master said in "Teaching the Fa in the City of Los Angeles":
"If you always reject reproaches and criticism, always point your fingers at others, and always refute others' disapproval and criticism, is that cultivating? How is that cultivating? You have grown used to focusing on other people's shortcomings, and never take examining your own self seriously. When others' cultivation one day meets with success, what about you? Isn't Master hoping that you are cultivating well? Why won't you accept criticism, and why do you keep focusing on other people? Why not cultivate inward and examine your own self? Why do you get agitated when you are criticized?"
Isn't this Fa principle pointing at me? Over time, I became lax and didn't take things too seriously. Although I have read this passage many times in the past three years, the habit of not letting others criticize me has not been fundamentally relinquished. At most, the change only appeared on the surface. Thus, in dealing with people who offered me comments, I accepted them if I liked them. If not, I would reject them. Taking criticism from others with openness and frankness was rare. For example, one day, a practitioner said that the way I spoke with people was like a CCP secretary. I got agitated almost immediately and thought: "How can he make such a comparison?" However, because the Fa requires tolerance, I took it to heart.
I recently read "Fa Teaching Given in Manhattan". Master said:
"Nothing is that simple, be it something seemingly minor, what thoughts someone has, or the wide array of people and things that you run into when you are clarifying the truth. But, it's only acceptable when you go about things with compassion in your heart. Don't be bothered when people have a certain attitude or misunderstandings. When you act just to save the person, to save sentient beings, then I think the impact of that can change everything. If, however, as you clarify the truth your mind is affected by ordinary human attachments, then you won't be able to achieve anything."
When I measured my behavior against the Fa, I felt shocked. I was easily moved by an ordinary person and had the habit of not letting others point out my shortcomings. All these inadequacies should have long been discarded by a practitioner in the Fa-rectification period. I have dragged along these attachments for so long. I felt unworthy of Master's compassionate salvation and boundless grace.
No matter how much hardship we encounter, we must face it with frankness and always have a compassionate heart to save those beings who are waiting for us.
