(Clearwisdom.net) I work with a fellow practitioner producing Falun Dafa truth clarification materials. When we first started, we worked well together. However, after working together for a while, our differences began growing, and we developed negative views of each other. I felt bad about it. I knew that it should not be like this, and that I needed to study the Fa more, but I just didn't feel that I could improve. I felt terrible about the situation.
One day, the printer started acting abnormally, and I felt that we should stop printing. I needed to be responsible for the materials production site, so I told myself that I should have a good conversation with that practitioner. I should let him know all of my negative thoughts about him and expose all of my selfish attachments.
I went to him, but when I wanted to speak, my heart started pounding. Why was it so hard to speak? It was because the attachment hiding behind my negative views was afraid of being exposed. The first negative view that I told him about was full of selfishness, fear, and envy. These dark things were blocking me from sharing with him and were creating gaps between us.
Then I thought, "What will he think of me? I don't care. Even if he criticizes me, as long as Teacher still takes me as his disciple, that's OK." Thus, I told him the first bad thought I had about him. I had expected that he would look down on me, but he didn't. I felt relieved when I got home. I put my hands in heshi in front of Teacher's picture and made a wish that I could eliminate all these attachments.
A few days later, another problem occurred in our materials production site, and we sat down to talk about it. This time I didn't use human notions. Instead, I shared with him the gaps in my xinxing and all my negative views about him. He also shared his negative views of me. After that, the gaps between us disappeared. That night, when sending forth righteous thoughts, I felt that my righteous thoughts were very strong.
The next day, he told me that he had found a lot of attachments when looking inward. We shared our understandings more and we both felt that we had improved a lot. We realized that the bad things that we had seen while sending forth the righteous thoughts were a hint from Teacher. The evil spirits were hiding in the gap between us, and in our attachments. In Lecture Five of Zhuan Falun, Teacher said,
"When they commit wrongdoing, the higher lives will kill them. When this is about to happen, they will run and get on the Buddha statues."
"They know if they are to be killed, so they will try to escape."
That was why we didn't feel the power of sending forth righteous thoughts before. It was because they hid in our attachments and gaps and came out to do bad things when we stopped sending forth righteous thoughts.
We then realized that sometime earlier, a different local materials production site had been destroyed because the two practitioners there hadn't resolved their conflicts. There were also some other materials production sites where the practitioners had conflicts, and sometimes they didn't even talk to each other. Why did some machines keep having problems at some materials sites? Why were some practitioners who worked at the sites followed by police agents? Fellow practitioners, we are cultivators. We should put the Fa first in everything we do. Teacher asks us to look inward unconditionally. Have we really done that? Holding negative views of other practitioners is something of everyday people. That's the attachment that we should eliminate. Why do we always focus on our own views but ignore studying the Fa and looking within?
After that practitioner and I resolved our conflicts, we gained many new understandings while studying the Fa. It is only when we improve our xinxing that Teacher will show us the Fa at the next level. Fellow practitioners, let's all improve together.
Please kindly point out where I have misunderstandings.
