(Clearwisdom.net) Greetings, benevolent Master! Greetings, fellow practitioners!
I'm a female practitioner who lives in the countryside. Due to some acquired notions, I had never written an experience sharing article because I had thought that I was not well educated. Now I realize that as a Dafa disciple, it is my responsibility to share my experiences. I am honored to be a Dafa disciple during the Fa rectification period. It is this great Fa that has rectified me. I have cultivated in Dafa for 14 years, which has been the happiest time in my life. I've also cultivated in the Fa rectification period for 10 years. Just as thousands of other Dafa disciples, I have suffered senseless persecution, lost a normal life, and was forced to leave home. I have endured countless tribulations. Yet my belief in Master, in Dafa, has remained steadfast, and I have never wavered in my cultivation. We've come a long way thanks to Master's benevolent protection.
My husband began having health problems when our son was only 8 months old. After 7 to 8 years and incurring many debts, he still was not cured. So we began practicing Dafa, hoping that it might cure my husband's illness. Dafa's miraculous healing power impressed our entire family, and they all became practitioners. We began spreading the Fa in our town and volunteered to teach the exercises. Gradually more than 400 people in our town attained the Fa.
When the Communist regime began persecuting Dafa practitioners in 1999, our family became a key target. Since my husband was a local coordinator, he was watched and followed; and since April 25, 1999, our family was constantly harassed by the local authorities. Sometimes we were not even allowed to leave our home to go to work. On July 20, 1999, three coordinators in our town were arrested. All the practitioners in our town stepped out and went to the town government to demand the release of these three practitioners. Eventually all three were released. The evening of their release, we gathered at our usual exercise site and practiced together while police officers and town government officials watched from the side until we finished. When I arrived home, I found that our front door and back window were under surveillance, and there were light bulbs surrounding our house. They bolted our front gate with an iron bar at night and removed it during the day. They watched our front door to make sure that no one left the house. During that time we were literally under house arrest.
On July 22, 1999, our home was searched three times by more than 30 people. My older brother, who is not a practitioner, came to visit me. He was brutally beaten by officers from the police station and some town government officials. My husband and I were taken to the police station where we were held for more than 10 days, during which we were beaten and tortured.
In the winter of 1999, one practitioner went to Beijing to validate the Fa. He was arrested and tortured. The authorities extorted 20,000 yuan from his family. They could not withstand the pressure and revealed the names of other practitioners to the authorities. As a result, my nephew, who was not a practitioner, was also arrested and beaten. My husband and I were beaten so badly that our bodies were black and blue.
On the 8th day of the fourth month of the lunar calendar in 2000, which was Master's birthday, my husband and I, along with another practitioner, were taken to the town government where we were tortured. Poisoned by the Chinese Communist Party (CCP)'s propaganda, these government officials thought that all Falun Gong practitioners were like what they saw on TV and so they beat us with great hatred. They forbade us to speak and beat us with three iron core, leather police batons covered with spikes. Two of the batons were broken as a result of the beating. They beat me so hard that I was not able to get up from the cement floor. My legs were so swollen from the beating that I could not even use the toilet. Even a month later, there were still lumps in my legs. The other two practitioners suffered more than I did. Without Master's protection, we would all be disabled.
However, no matter how brutally we were persecuted, we remained steadfast in our belief in Master and Dafa. We firmly believed that there was nothing wrong with practicing, nothing wrong with being a good person. We should not be persecuted. We wanted to go to Beijing to validate the Fa, but I was blocked by my fear of being tortured again. Through Fa study and sharing with fellow practitioners, I was able to make a breakthrough in July 2000. My husband and I took the train to Beijing and we met fellow practitioners on the train. I instantly felt that my body was extremely light, and there was a sense of happiness in my heart. I said to myself: I'm going to Beijing to validate the Fa. I shall come back in the same manner as I go, and I will not allow the evil's persecution anymore.
After we came back from Beijing I found out that because we had gone to Beijing, our local evil forces were scared. They locked up all the practitioners in our town and searched everywhere for me and my husband. It was said that they went to Beijing twice to look for us but with no success. So we did not go home. Instead we rented a place and found temporary jobs. When we got to our rental apartment, we saw that the place was ready to move in. I was very moved, thinking it must be Master constantly looking out for us. We clarified the truth about Falun Gong to people at work so they knew that Dafa is good.
The owner of the factory where I worked read the material that I gave him and knew that Falun Gong practitioners were all good people and were different than what was shown on TV. My husband and I worked in the same factory and we did everything well. The owner felt very comfortable. We had an open practice environment near where we lived. We did not have a lot of experience in doing truth-clarifying work. Mainly we would distribute the informational materials and post self-adhesive posters. In December 2000, my husband and another practitioner were arrested while they were distributing the materials. They were taken to the police station where the police beat and tortured them for three days and nights in an attempt to force them to reveal the source of the truth-clarifying materials. My husband did not say anything. In the end, the other practitioner was sent to the forced labor camp, and my husband was detained at the detention center for one month before he was transferred to another detention center where he was detained for three months.
I did not know about my husband's arrest at first and used our land-line phone to page him. The authorities were able to trace the phone call and find where we lived. As soon as I found out about my husband's arrest, I quickly left our rental. Then I thought: Something is not quite right. Cherishing Dafa is the same as cherishing one's own life. How could I leave without taking the Dafa books and the exercise tapes with me? If these materials were lost, how could I be a Dafa disciple anymore? So I rushed back and put away all the Falun Gong related materials before I left again. As soon as I left the rental, the authorities searched the place. It was late at night, so I went to a relative's home. But I left several days later, after I learned that I could not exercise or study the Fa there. I wanted to find some temporary jobs to support myself while I also hid away from the authorities. But people were scared (that I was a practitioner) and no one was willing to give me a job. So I wandered in the society for more than 3 months, enduring all sorts of tribulations. Even small children gave me a hard time. The experience helped me eliminate many of my attachments.
As it was approaching the Chinese New Year, my attachments began to surface. I was thinking about my 78 year old mother-in-law and my 11 year old son, who were left home without anyone to take care of them. I also thought about my husband, who was suffering in the detention center. But I could not go home since the authorities were still looking for me. I felt very bad.
On New Year's Eve, the authorities went to my home looking for me. When they saw I was not there, they went to my parents' home, but still could not find me. By then, I had found one of my relatives was away and I was able spend New Year's at their place.
After being detained for three months, with Master's protection, my husband was released. Once again we found a temporary place away from home. I also found a job quite close to where we lived. I know everything was arranged by Master. My husband was distributing the truth-clarifying materials while I went to work. We could make ends meet. If I had time, I would go out and distribute the truth-clarifying materials as well. At that time, not that many practitioners could come out and distribute the materials, so my husband and I carried a heavy load. From time to time, we would run into some tribulations. But with Master's benevolent protection, we were never in any real danger.
As time went by, more and more material centers were set up in the surrounding villages. So my husband and I rode on a motorcycle to distribute materials to more remote locations. One time, I was stopped by a security guard in a village. He hit me, dragged me, and used a knife to threaten me. I thought: I have Master's law body to protect me. I'm not scared of you. Soon this person left, and I went to other villages to distribute the materials.
In the summer of 2001, my husband was arrested again, along with seven other practitioners. They were sent to the forced labor camp while my husband was detained in the detention center for one month before he was transferred to the local police station. The officers wanted to send my husband to the forced labor camp, but he did not pass the physical exam. The police station tried to bribe the forced labor camp into accepting him, but they met with no success, so they continued to torture him. My husband went on a hunger strike. After three days and nights, he began to show some life threatening signs, so the police finally released him.
Within three days after my husband arrived at home, as he was still lying in bed recovering, two town government officials came to our house. They forced my mother-in-law out of the house, locked the door, and began to brutally beat my husband. Three days later, they came again to take him away, but my husband resisted. Seeing that he would not be able to stay home without harassment, my husband was forced to leave again.
In 2003, the practitioners who ran the materials center were arrested, and there were fewer and fewer practitioners making the truth-clarification materials. So my husband and I decided to run our own materials center. I think that Master saw our desire and arranged to have a practitioner send us equipment so we could run our own materials center. It ran smoothly for five years. In October 2008, our materials center was searched, and I was arrested. My husband managed to escape and notified those practitioners who had been in contact with him.
I was taken to the Public Security Branch that evening. I told myself: Even if I have to shed this human skin, I will not cooperate with the evil and betray other practitioners. Then I thought: I should not think that way. If I have to die, it would happen outside of Master's arrangements, it would be because I was following the old forces' arrangement. I should completely negate this thought and walk the path that Master has arranged for me.
I was determined to not cooperate with the evil, that I would completely negate the old forces' arrangements. I did not say anything. Not a word. One of the officers asked me to raise my head and look at him. So I did. I looked straight into his eyes and at the same time sent righteous thoughts to eliminate all the evil elements that were manipulating the officers behind their backs. The officer saw that I was not affected so he began kicking my legs and smashed my knees with his heels. I continued to stare at him with strong righteous thoughts. It was too much for him to bear and soon he could not look at me anymore. I said to myself: No matter how crazy you evil forces act, I'll stay unaffected and will be able to handle all situations. It lasted until the next day. The officers were all tired and went home to sleep. I was handcuffed with my arms tied behind my back and my eyes blindfolded. I continued to send righteous thoughts.
The next afternoon, I was sent to the detention center. As I arrived at the detention center, I asked myself: What had caused my arrest this time? I began to calm down and look inward. I found many of my attachments - attachment to comfort, attachment to competition, attachment to self, attachment to validating myself, and an unwillingness to be criticized. One time, I had a big argument with my husband because I was not happy about being criticized. I was very irrational and acted like a non-practitioner. Under the influence of my acquired notions, I yelled at my husband: "I wish I could be arrested and taken away so I wouldn't need to stay here with you and be upset." As soon as I said it, my husband asked me to take back what I had just said. But because I cared too much about saving face, I didn't want to take back my words even though I knew I was wrong. The old forces took advantage of my unrighteous thought. Not only was I arrested, I had also caused a great loss to Dafa. I was overcome with remorse.
As soon as I found the root cause of my arrest, I removed all my human thoughts. Besides sending righteous thoughts, I recited Master's articles. I also tried to clarify the truth to the inmates and asked them to quit the CCP and all its affiliated organizations. I would get up at 3:40 a.m. every day to do the exercises. Sometimes if I overslept, the inmates would wake me up.
Here I would also like to share my thoughts on what I noticed in the detention center. Some practitioners went on hunger strikes in the detention center and suffered a lot as a result. I don't think it's wrong to go on a hunger strike. But we need to be clear as to why we go on a hunger strike, under what mentality and when. We, Dafa disciples, are images of Dafa. No matter what we do we should always think whether it's useful for validating the Fa and saving sentient beings. So why do we go on a hunger strike? If it is because of the fear of being sent to the forced labor camp or the hope of being released early, then I would say the purpose is not pure. This omission would be taken advantage of by the old forces to further persecute us. Many practitioners suffered all sorts of torture but in the end could not avoid being sent to the forced labor camp or being sentenced. Many of them are still detained at the detention center. I saw that most of the practitioners who went on a hunger strike were those who were running the material centers. Personally I think that no matter how much we've done for Dafa, it should not be used by the evil forces as an excuse to persecute us. We cannot leave any confessions or signatures, or answer any of their questions during arraignment. In a word, we cannot cooperate with the evil forces at all. We have done nothing wrong, and Master is watching over us all the time.
Master has said: "Imprisoned as you are, don't be sorrowful or sad. Carry on with righteous thoughts and actions, and the Fa is with you. Calmly reflect on the attachments you have. Remove your human thoughts and evil will naturally die out." ("Don't Be Sad" in Hong Yin Volume II)
Whatever Master has said is the Fa. As long as we can truly take the Fa as our teacher, truly look inward and remove our human attachments, we can completely negate all old forces' arrangements and walk on the path that Master has arranged for us. We don't necessarily need to go on a hunger strike and endure the physical suffering.
This time I was detained for 40 days, during which time I was arraigned 9 times. Each time I was able to have the righteous thoughts and righteous actions and refused to cooperate with the evil. I had Fa in my heart and I used the Fa to measure everything. When I removed my attachments and took the Fa as my teacher, I could clearly see the evil's purpose behind their every word, every move. Since I refused to cooperate with them, they did not get any confessions or signatures from me. They tried to use what they had confiscated from the materials center as evidence to sentence me. When I was arraigned on Day 32, I told the Procuratorate that whatever I had done was all good, that if they tried to use these materials as evidence to persecute me, I would not concede. After ten minutes, they could not continue with the arraignment anymore and left. On Day 37, the detention center was ready to release me. But the officers at the Public Security Branch refused. They said: "You didn't confess to anything. How can we release you?" So they took me to a hotel and detained me there.
When I didn't know what to do, Master reminded me that it's time for me to go on a hunger strike. With Master's benevolent strengthening, I didn't feel thirst or hunger for three days and nights. One of the branch directors wanted to force feed me. I said to him: "I'm not afraid of being force fed. You read Minghui Net every day so you should know that there is a world organization that investigates the persecution of Falun Gong. If you force feed me today, you'll be tried by a court of justice in the future." He was so shocked when he heard this that his face reddened. After that, no one would try to force feed me. As I kept clarifying the truth to them, their attitude toward me became better and better. Someone said to me: "You should simply eat or drink whenever you want. When the authorities come to check, we would just tell them that you've been on a hunger strike." I realized that it was another test for me. One night when I got up in the middle of the night, the guard gave me some water to drink. I said no to him. He said: "You don't trust me?" I said: "It's not because I don't trust you. I am on a hunger strike and I won't take any food or water." He didn't say anything more. Later I found out that if I had taken any food, I would have been held for extra days.
After three days and nights, with fellow practitioners' righteous thoughts and Master's benevolent protection, I was released and went home in a dignified manner.
These tribulations and lessons have made me more rational and more clearheaded. I have further understood the seriousness of cultivation and how to walk the remaining path of my cultivation. We have Master, we have the Fa. We will study the Fa well and take the Fa as our teacher. We'll think righteously and act righteously and have strict requirements for ourselves. We'll look inward whenever we have tribulations and truly cultivate ourselves. We'll do the three things well, according to Master's requirements, and save more sentient beings. We'll walk well and righteously on the sacred path Master has arranged for us to save sentient beings so we can fulfill our prehistoric vows. We also hope that we can see Master soon.
Thank you, Master, for your benevolent salvation!