(Clearwisdom.net) I am a Falun Gong practitioner in a town in China. On May 12, 2008, I was arrested by the local police. In the police station, I clarified the truth to them without giving them my name or address. That night I was detained in the local detention center.
On the third day, staff members from the Police Station, National Security Division and 610 Office came to see me at the detention center and took me to the main office. I saw them bring a video camera, a big fingerprint case and a pile of materials to sign. Several of them forced me to have a photo taken. I immediately became alert and asked them why they asked me to do this. They said, "If you do not report your name to us, we will send you away." Several of them took me to produce fingerprints and signatures. (Maybe it was a procedure before they sent me away.) At that moment I was very clear in my mind: Many practitioners went to Tiananmen Square to protect Dafa, and many didn't report their names or addresses and have never been heard of since. Some of them had their organs removed when they were still alive. Today the CCP is accelerating the persecution of Falun Gong practitioners again by using the excuse of the "Olympic Games."
I had one thought: I am not going to follow the arrangement of the evil forces. I completely deny the arrangement of the evil forces. I was very clear-headed. I only thought about Teacher. I ask Teacher for help whenever I am in a tribulation. I shouted in my heart: Teacher, your disciple is in danger, please help your disciple break away from danger. When that thought occurred, I felt that my heart was full of righteous might. I sat in lotus position immediately, held one palm erect and sent forth righteous thoughts. At the sight of my holding one palm erect, one policeman said, "She is serious." Another police officer who ordered me to make fingerprints said, "The stamp ink is out. No fingerprints can be taken today." At that moment several policemen came over to pull me towards the car, but no matter how hard they tried they couldn't move me. One of the policemen said, "I just don't believe that several people cannot move this woman." Then several more of them pulled me together, but still couldn't move me.
One police officer didn't want to allow me to hold my palm erect and tried to pull my right hand down. At the first pull, he drew his hands back immediately, just as if he had been shocked by electricity. He shook his hands, saying, "It's too heavy." Three police officers were breathless and moved back to take a break in another room. After a few seconds, the police shouted loudly outside, "Take that woman away." I sent forth another thought: today, nobody can touch me. No one can enter this room. As expected, those several police officers weren't able to enter. They just took a look inside and left with their stuff.
Checking identification is a tactic aimed at rooting out Falun Gong practitioners. All the Falun Gong practitioners who refused to report their names and addresses were sent out of the local area. Actually it is another means of cruel persecution. The police didn't know my true identification. They would not let me go, so they brought several persons from "610 Office"and National Security Division to the detention center to check my identification. At that time I assumed the lotus position, held one palm erect and sent forth one thought of not allowing the evil to come close to me. They recognized me. They knew my name and address, but they didn't ask me anything and turned away.
When I was detained, I spent only several hours a day sleeping, while the rest of time I sent forth righteous thoughts to rectify the Fa as long as I could remember. I "clarified the truth" to the people in the detention center and persuaded them to quit the Chinese Communist Party (CCP), the Youth League and the Young Pioneers. Two of them agreed to quit the CCP. In the meantime, I looked within to find my loopholes in cultivation. As I did so, Teacher's poem Don't Be Sad (from Hong Yin Volume II) appeared in my mind. I immediately engraved this poem in the wall. I sat opposite to the wall and searched my inner heart little by little. When I found my loopholes in several respects, I was scared for myself. I was too far away from Dafa.
Selfish Thoughts of Self-protection Separate Me from Fellow Practitioners
I was arrested by the police, but no fellow practitioners knew about it. Before my arrest, I had lost contact with fellow practitioners. News of the incident was blocked, so I couldn't be rescued by fellow practitioners.
The reason for this resulted from my own selfishness.
During cultivation it was manifested as: whenever I went out to clarify the truth, persuade people to quit the party or distribute materials, I liked to do it by myself without cooperating with fellow practitioners. Why was that? Because I had a heart of self-protection, which was very bad and selfish. I thought other fellow practitioners had many human thoughts and lacked righteous thoughts, which would influence me. I thought it would be better to do it by myself and to make it fast and well-done.
A long period of doing things that way separated me from fellow practitioners. But I didn't know that my behavior was on the path of the old forces. It was still a way of doing things according to the principle of the old cosmos. Because I followed the old cosmic principle of selfishness, with an emphasis on self-protection but without consideration of others, I was unable to abide by the principle of the new cosmos: selflessness, all for others, which is making Dafa practitioners attain the righteous Enlightenment of altruism. So this disastrous lesson is actually an exposure of my selfishness and it gives me an opportunity to disintegrate it completely.
We Dafa practitioners are one body, which is indestructible. Only when the whole body is harmonized with each other can it display its mighty power. If two people went out together, then these two people are one body; if three people went out together, then these three people are one body. There was a program called "Chopstick Zest" in the Chinese New Year Spectacular this year. I thought that was also a hint for us: one chopstick is easy to break, while a bunch of chopsticks is very strong. From now on, I will assimilate to the whole body of Dafa practitioners in saving sentient beings.
Showing Off and Validating Myself Also Separate Me from Others
Teacher said, "In order to gain fame, personal profit, and a little benefit, some people often brag about themselves and show off, 'I'm very capable and a winner.'"(from Lecture Six, Zhuan Falun) I am this kind of person.
When I get in touch with fellow practitioners, I often feel that they are not cultivating well. Sometimes I even look down upon fellow practitioners.
Whenever I did a little validating the Fa, I would tell fellow practitioners that it was attributed to how well I had done. Actually this was validating myself instead of validating the Fa. Gradually, an intangible barrier came into being between fellow practitioners and I. Fellow practitioners pointed out my problem, saying that I had the attachment to pride. However, I just didn't listen, but blamed them instead. Today I completely recognized this filthy attachment. Everything is done by Teacher. Everything is the manifestation and mighty power of Dafa.
Lacking Sufficient Compassion
While getting in touch with fellow practitioners in daily life, I commanded them, like the types of leaders of those among everyday people. I pointed out their shortcomings with acrid and mean language, not with compassion. Additionally, I had hatred towards evil people who persecute Dafa, i.e. the deputy superintendent. Every Dafa practitioner who has been detained there has been cursed and beaten by him. Every time I sent forth righteous thoughts I showed strong hatred for him. Today I was arrested again. The same deputy superintendent beat me and cursed me, saying a lot of words that disrespect Dafa. He also threatened me, saying that they would not release me.
While I looked within to see my loopholes, all of a sudden I was aware that Dafa practitioners shouldn't have such hatred in their heart because we cultivate Shan (Compassion). We have no enemies, and we should be compassionate to everyone. Therefore, my mental state of sending forth righteous thoughts towards the deputy superintendent changed. I held my palm erect and sent forth righteous thoughts towards his office, thinking, "He is also a victim. Having been deceived by the CCP, he produced karma, but he also came for Dafa and is a sentient beings that should be saved. So I will send my supernormal abilities to his dimension field, completely disintegrate all the evil, dark minions, and the Communist specter that manipulate him in his dimensional field to do bad things to Dafa and persecute Dafa practitioners, reveal his compassionate innate self which knows the truth, make him follow the principle of compassion and release Dafa practitioners immediately." I kept this thought in mind while sending forth righteous thoughts the whole day and the whole night. By the next morning, he had changed completely. He didn't curse me or say anything, like nothing had happened. He didn't create difficulties for me and let me go around 7:00 a.m. I knew in my heart that it was because the evil beings that manipulated him in his dimensional field had been disintegrated.
Through looking within, I feel very light. Under Teacher's merciful protection, I destroyed the arrangements of the evil. Meanwhile, I also witnessed the marvelous mighty power of Dafa. I grandly walked out of that dark den of evil forces.
Dear fellow practitioners: please take my experiences as a lesson. Don't look within only after trouble occurs. Every thought should be rectified by Dafa. I was deeply enlightened to one point: pushing away contradiction when it occurs creates more tribulation; looking within when contradiction occurs meets with quick success.
