(Clearwisdom.net) A few days ago, with help from Practitioner A, my husband and I began working at a new company. During this process we encountered many problems, and our xinxing improved drastically. I'd like to share this experience with everyone.
When I first started the new job, I encountered quite a few difficult issues. First, the chief executive officer (CEO) of the company thought highly of my educational background and ability. She wanted to designate me as the chief supervisor and fire Practitioner A's husband. When I learned about this, I became very sad. She asked me not to tell anyone else about it, but I was worried that Practitioner A would not understand the situation and that it would cause trouble between us. Because of this I dared not tell Practitioner A. Additionally, I knew that even though I told the CEO about my relationship with Practitioner A, it would not help. That was because she had wanted to fire him a long time ago. At work, only your performance counted, not who you know.
When I was trying to figure out what to do, I suddenly realized that I was treating the situation like an ordinary person. I began to look at this issue from the perspective of the Fa. I realized that maybe it was the old forces attempting to separate practitioners so as to weaken our efforts in clarifying the truth. I knew I should block this. On the other hand, both A and I are practitioners. We are actually one body. Yet our boss and A's husband are ordinary persons who should be led by us and be saved by us. I should not have been so moved by self-interest that I forgot the differences between practitioners and non-practitioners. So I realized I should let go of my own interests and tell A about this issue.
When I went to talk to A, after she heard what I said, she was quite distressed, too. She said, "Well, I will not say anything. I will just see what happens next." When I started my job, I couldn't calm down for a very long time and had a very difficult time figuring out what to do. Suddenly, I asked myself why I couldn't let go. I began searching inside myself. Why was it that I couldn't let go? On the surface, I was afraid of harming the fellow practitioners' feelings. Actually, I was afraid that fellow practitioners would misunderstand me. What I was really afraid of harming was myself. On the surface, I was afraid that the old forces would separate us. In fact, what I could not let go of was the sentimentality between myself and other practitioners, and the human heart of depending on other practitioners, as well as the comfortable and harmonious atmosphere. Whether I would or would not be the chief supervisor was something I should measure with the Fa. Would there be anything wrong with it? Since there would be nothing wrong, why couldn't I face it with a calm, open and dignified mind? After I got to this point, I slowly calmed down.
At lunch hour I shared the same dining table with A. Just as I opened my mouth to say something about work, she smiled, "Just let go of it. Is there anything that we can't let go? Let's just follow the natural path and do what we should do." My face turned red. I felt so ashamed in the presence of the tolerance of my fellow practitioner, wondering why heart was so small. I said, "Yes. I just realized that all this should be let go. If it were not for this issue, I wouldn't know that I still have so many attachments." Suddenly I understood that my path was arranged by Master, while everyday peoples' paths are arranged by heaven. I became calmer and calmer.
Later, the CEO asked me to come to her office. At that moment I realized that as a cultivator, just letting go of my human notions was not enough. I still had some shortcomings. That is I still treated myself as an ordinary person, not a Dafa practitioner in this Fa-rectification period. I should put the Fa-rectification first. Since I had already let go of all those attachments, I knew I should consider how to save sentient beings in a better way and not let sentient beings misunderstand us. At the same time, not only should I let go of my attachments, I should also totally let go of self and sacrifice all of my interests for others.
When I had this thought, I said to the owner, "I heard there is another position. I was wondering whether you need me to fill that position." She said, "Well, yes, that position is..." I found that it was exactly what I needed. So I asked her to let me fill that position. But she said, "I still hope that you can be the chief supervisor." I smiled and said, "I work here not only because I need to make a living, I also want to help the company get better and better. That's why I make a great effort to help. If you think the chief supervisor isn't good enough and has any shortcomings, I can help him. You don't need to lay him off. As long as we can reach the goal, that is what really matters."
She looked at me quite surprised. I guess maybe she had never met anyone like me. When she offered me a good position, I was not moved and influenced by it. Rather, I still thought of others. I kept smiling slightly during our conversation. Usually she was quite bad-tempered. When I first entered her office, she was rather cold. Yet, after we started talking, her attitude changed within 30 minutes and she began to follow me and be in a good mood. This was because during that conversation I was thinking of her. In the end, she gave me a salary which was surprisingly high compared to all the other employees, even though she had a reputation of being quite stingy. She also gave me an apartment that was beyond my expectations. I did need that apartment because it was near the company. This would save time, allowing more time for Fa study. Also I always wanted to distribute truth-clarifying materials in that area, but I had only done it once or twice due to the inconvenience.
Through this event I also came to understand more Fa principles. Everything around us is like a mirror, reflecting our strengths and weaknesses. When I totally thought of her wellbeing, a person as cold as she became generous. I also understood something about the realm of xinxing. That is, only by letting go can you have it, but it no longer matters whether you have it or not. Whether I had it or not, I felt very blissful from the bottom of my heart. I also understood that kindness and sincerity could change others. "Truthfulness, Benevolence, Forbearance" is the answer to all.
The first day I started working there, I discovered that the chief supervisor was not A's husband after all. I was quite relieved, and realized that the whole misunderstanding was just to test A and me. Suddenly I wondered why I felt so relieved. What human notions did I have that made me feel so relieved? The heart of treating people differently! The heart of treating different sentient beings in different ways. Did I really believe in my heart that A's husband and this chief supervisor were different in any way? No. They were both living beings that we should save. I should completely let go of self and think of others, no matter who it is.
I noticed that there were already three persons working in the office. I chatted with them and could feel that there was still some hostility. I was quite sad, because I knew that this hostility was due to my bad xinxing. It was because I had been nervous and worried too much about whether they would be upset because of me. And I worried that they would cause me trouble if they were upset. I also worried that if I told them the truth, they would not listen, and as a result it would bring trouble to my work and my life. I understood that I should completely let go of all of these notions, which was actually letting go of self. Wasn't it my own interests that I was really worried about?
I feel that if I can indeed look inside myself at all times and spend more time studying the Fa, the field of righteous thoughts that I have will surely be compassionate and harmonious. It must act totally for others. My words and actions should meet a high standard in thinking of others. In this way, people around me will be assimilated and changed by me. Gradually they will become happy and considerate of others as well. As a result there will be no alarm at all and they will surely have the opportunity to get to know the beauty of Dafa.
As I wrote this, two things came to me. One was the relationship between sending righteous thoughts and studying the Fa. In the past, I only sent righteous thoughts when I encountered problems. I always spent more time studying the Fa than sending righteous thoughts. Studying the Fa cannot replace sending righteous thoughts. This is because, when we are changing ourselves to assimilate to the Fa, we need to eliminate the evil around us so as to save sentient beings. Of course, it is not acceptable to study the Fa less. These days I am trying to spend all my spare time reciting the Fa and assimilating to the Fa, as well as sending righteous thoughts every hour. Great changes are taking place in me. I change completely almost every day.
This is my personal understanding. If there are areas which are not correct, please kindly correct me.
February 22, 2008
