(Clearwisdom.net) Two days after I watched the video "Fa-Teaching Given to the Australian Practitioners," I woke up in pain at 5:00 a.m. I realized that my head was hurting terribly, and I had difficulty breathing. It felt like there was a rock on my chest. My whole body was ice cold; I knew it was serious. I immediately sent forth righteous thoughts and asked Teacher to strengthen me. After sending forth righteous thoughts at 6 a.m. as part of the global effort, I felt a lot better. The day went by.
I did not expect anything worse could happen. But by five o'clock in the afternoon, my head hurt so bad I thought it was going to explode. My chest felt as if there was a knife in it; worse, I could not inhale or exhale. I could not even move a little without the stabbing pain in my chest. This was acute myocardial infarction--a heart attack, and it could easily mean the end of my life. From 5 p.m. to 11 p.m., I coughed, trying to get air to breathe. I had cold sweats and was as cold as ice. I finally made it to midnight when practitioners send forth righteous thoughts globally. I felt a little better. As such, I passed the tribulation with Teacher's help.
Through this experience, I came to understand the following points:
1. One must believe in Teacher and the Fa at all times; one must maintain righteous thoughts at all times.Several hours before my experience, I was given a hint: In my dream, I was mediating on a big rock. Suddenly, I heard someone shouting behind and above my head. I turned around and peeked behind me. I saw a valley so deep it didn't appear to have a bottom. Although I was a little afraid, I sat still. Thus I took this tribulation seriously and was very vigilant. I told myself that I must have righteous thoughts at every moment. I must believe in Teacher and the Fa. I must not have the slightest human notion. My success or failure can depend on one thought. During the worst few hours of my tribulation, I mostly thought, "When disciples have ample righteous thoughts, Master has the power to turn back the tide" (Hong Yin II, "The Master-Disciple Bond")
2. During a tribulation, the Dafa disciple must follow Teacher's instructions and search inside.
During the worst of my tribulation, scenes came to mind from my cultivation of the past ten years, especially during the last two years, when I had not acted according to the Fa. Here is my summary:
a). I had not removed the attachments that were influenced by the evil Party. I only wanted to change others, but not myself. I judged things by the Fa of the old cosmos. The result was I did not treat my family or relatives with the compassion of a practitioner. I always used the phrase, "I don't hate him/her, but I don't love him/her," which was very irresponsible. I used such things as an excuse for my selfishness. In fact, I criticized them and had negative opinions about them. I was very close to peril.
b). I had not paid attention while sending forth righteous thoughts. This year I was often sleepy or had random thoughts while sending righteous thoughts. I sent forth righteous thought for between 10 minutes and 15 minutes, mostly it was only 10 minutes. I treated it as an assignment, and the evil took advantage of this.
c). I did not do well saving sentient beings as Teacher requires us. Teacher has said many times that the only thing Dafa disciples have a role in is saving people. At this precious time beyond measure, I did not truly understand that. I thought I was clarifying the truth, advising people to withdraw from the Chinese Communist Party, and distributing truth-clarifying materials. But it was just "completing a task." I fooled myself into thinking that I was keeping up with the Fa-rectification progress. The truth was just the opposite, and I missed many opportunities because of my fear, selfishness, and other human attachments.
3. Practitioners must cooperate with each other and form an indestructible body so that we can eliminate the persecution better.
As I was going through such a tough tribulation, my spouse (also a practitioner) asked another practitioner in my village to help me strengthen my righteous thoughts. This practitioner is very diligent in cultivation, and she always views others' issues as her own. As soon as she arrived, she began strengthening my righteous thoughts with the Teacher's Fa. For a long time, she sent forth righteous thoughts. After a while (about 11 p.m.) I felt a larger field of truly righteous thoughts. Even though I was still in a lot of pain physically, my spirit was high. This practitioner went home after sending forth righteous thought at midnight. By then, I was able to send forth righteous thoughts calmly with help of the righteous field from practitioners around the world. I felt much better. Therefore, cooperation among practitioners is necessary in validating the Fa.
Finally, I have a few more thoughts:
I am not well educated as I only finished the seventh grade. I had a big attachment to being a practitioner who had started practicing Dafa before 1999. Yet, I was still having illness karma. I didn't want to write this article. When I searched inward, I realized that this was not right. I should write about my experience. During the process of writing, I was able to expose my shortcomings and get rid of attachments to improve.
I don't know how many times Teacher has saved me. I cannot put into words my feelings toward Teacher. I wrote this experience sharing in tears. The only thing I can say is that, from now on, I will cultivate myself diligently, do well in the three things, and fulfill my prehistoric vow.
I also want to remind fellow practitioners who have similar experiences that you must believe in Teacher and the Fa no matter how big the tribulation is at the time. Do not have any human notions, especially during those critical moments. It is very dangerous to waver, to not believe in Teacher and the Fa. Some of the practitioners in our region passed away because they did not pass their tribulations. That is a loss to us. In particular, to those practitioners who still have illness karma, you must treat it seriously and not let the old forces take advantage of your loopholes. The only way to avoid what I went through is to follow Teacher's Fa, remembering always that "the closer to the end, the more diligent you should be."
I still have many shortcomings. Please kindly point them out.
