(Clearwisdom.net)
Today, I'm forced to leave my home. When I knew that the police were coming to my home to arrest me, I made two calls to fellow practitioners and asked them to help me by sending forth righteous thoughts. One of them said, "search inside yourself." So, while packing up, I searched inside myself and felt that this incident should not have happened.
Under Master's protection and my righteous thoughts, my husband dealt with the police in a reasonable manner, and they did not find me. It appeared that no damage was done, but after all, it still put pressure on my family members. It also put pressure on fellow practitioners' validating the Fa. When I searched deeply inside of myself, it seemed that the problem happened because I was anxious in helping fellow practitioners to build a truth-clarification material station, and my attachment of seeking comfort was a little too much. Despite these attachments I still didn't think I had found the root cause. Having not found my deepest problem, I left home.
Now I only want to share with fellow practitioners through Clearwisdom about "searching within oneself."
In the past, no matter which practitioner was arrested or forcibly taken away, what was talked about most was that he or she was not based on the Fa in this or that aspect, or that he or she did not do well here or there. My fellow practitioners, with what kind of heart were we saying these words?
I remember that I once read an article on Clearwisdom, and I had a deep feeling about it. I also shared my understanding with other practitioners. It stated that when a fellow practitioner has any problem or attachment, it's best that we directly point it out compassionately and kindly. No matter what kind of attitude the other practitioner may have, we should not act in order to protect ourselves. Instead, we should have the attitude of being responsible to fellow practitioners and the Fa. After pointing it out, we should not continue to casually talk about the problem amongst ourselves. Because when we are commenting on those problems, besides releasing bad material, we are not in line with the cultivation of speech as taught by Master either. It would not be responsible to fellow practitioners at all. If we really want to be responsible to fellow practitioners, then even if they cannot accept what we point out, and does not realize the problem, we should still send forth righteous thoughts for him/her, and thus strengthen him/her to search inward and improve according to the Fa in a timely manner.
I have twice learned a grave lesson. One fellow practitioner often talks angrily. She napped when sending forth righteous thoughts, and she felt sleepy when reading the book. We lightly mentioned these to her twice, and she did not change much, so we gave up on her. Later, she was forcibly taken away by police. After her arrest, some fellow practitioners still commented on her as if she was "supposed" to be arrested. I really felt distressed that I had not done more to wake her up by seriously pointing out her problems, and had not used good tone, compassion, and reasoning to talk to her. We had not fulfilled our duty to help fellow practitioners to improve on the Fa from different angles.
Another fellow practitioner was loaded with lots of work. He was taking care of truth clarifying materials for several hundred people. He organized group study, and did some technical related work too. He was so busy that he had to go out every day. When we talked about these things, I saw his heart of worrying for other people (being moved), complaining about local practitioners not being coordinated well as a whole body, his complaints toward some fellow practitioners, etc. From the level of ordinary people, he was understandable, but I felt that what he said was not based on the Fa, but I was too shy to say this to him, as I felt that he was more capable than I, and that he was doing more work than I. I felt as if I was not entitled to point out his problems to him. A few days later, he was arrested. His arrest became the biggest ache in my heart. If I had not had so many ordinary people's attachments at that time, and if I had pointed out his problem to him in time, perhaps today things would be different.
My fellow practitioners, please tell me if you find my attachments. We are truly serious about our cultivation and we will definitely correct ourselves if we find our attachments or loopholes. It is because of our mentalities formed throughout history that we cannot easily see our attachments. People on the outside looking in are more clear minded. If fellow practitioners find our problems based on the Fa and point them out to us, what kind of compassion would that be! After all, we are fellow practitioners!
