(Clearwisdom.net)
Greetings to our most respected Master!
Greetings, fellow practitioners!
I am a Dafa practitioner from Utah. I am glad to share some of my cultivation experiences here today.
I have been cultivating Falun Dafa for about ten years. Looking back at my journey of cultivation, there have been no severe tribulations, no big splash, and nothing extraordinary, just improvement little by little. From ignorance in the very beginning - to awakening during the persecution - to becoming mature in Fa-rectification cultivation - I have many things to share with you all. All of what I have to share can be concluded in a few words: "Thank you Master Li for your great compassion and goodness. I will definitely take steady steps until the end of my cultivation journey."
I Started to Practice Dafa when I was a Child
I started to practice Dafa in China late in 1995, when I was a sixth-grader in elementary school. My mom obtained the Fa earlier on. She started her cultivation after obtaining a copy of Zhuan Falun from her younger brother. Later, my mom asked me to join her. In the beginning, I was not so diligent, and had a passive mentality. To be honest, I didn't seriously study the Fa until 1996. Unlike some other practitioners, I was not very excited or joyful when I obtained the Fa, nor did I experience any tough test of sickness karma. As my family put it, I was naive and simple-minded in my childhood. Fortunately though, my mom always took good care of me. As far back as I can remember, my mom took me to a nearby park by bicycle at 5:30 in the morning to do the exercises every day. We recited Lunyu on the way to the practice site, and corrected each other when making mistakes. My mom was very diligent in cultivation. Shortly after obtaining the Fa, she set up a small-scale Fa-study group at our home, and went to various places to promote Falun Gong. Once, we went back to my hometown to spread the Fa, and we took a group picture before leaving. Although I don't have the picture anymore, it is still vividly in my mind. There were a lot of practitioners standing in three rows before Master Li's photo. In the factory where my mom used to work, there were a lot of male and female coworkers who usually came to our place to study the Fa. With more and more people coming to our place, the small garden in front of our apartment building became the new practice site. We put up Master Li's photos, a calligraphy scroll of "Lunyu" and a Falun emblem on the four walls of our living room. As soon as it was 8:00 p.m. sharp, people could hear the sound of Fa-study every evening. It was so beautiful and peaceful!
Awakened
However, after the persecution was launched by the Chinese Communist regime, Fa-study had to be canceled. Though the resounding music of Falun Gong exercises in the park still vividly danced around in my ears, the site where we used to practice the exercises together became a place for people to practice martial arts. Later, my mom went to Beijing to appeal for Falun Gong, but she never came back. When I went to Beijing to take my mom's ashes back home, I didn't cry because I knew she had gone to a better place where she belonged. I can feel that she is still around me, and always encourages me to be more diligent. When the slanderous lies against Falun Gong overwhelmed the entire society, I was so sad and angry. Faced with unexpected disaster, I just didn't know what to do. When my mom was still alive, she arranged everything for me, so I didn't have to make many decisions myself. After she passed away, some of our relatives and friends who used to practice Falun Gong quit cultivating Dafa since they thought if even such a diligent practitioner like my mom died, why should they continue to practice Falun Gong? What's worse, some even betrayed Dafa. However, there were still many practitioners being steadfast to Master and Dafa. As Master Li said in Zhuan Falun (English translation version 2000),
"The great waves shift the sand, and that is what cultivation practice is all about. What is left in the end will be genuine gold."
My home became empty after the evil police ransacked it, taking away all of my Dafa books and articles. This is indeed a painful memory. Without anything to count on, I started to learn how to walk on the path myself. For a period of two years, I became like an ordinary person. My mind was numb. Fortunately, Master still took care of me. Two years later, when I was a senior in high school, one day, on my way home, I had a strong desire in my heart to read Zhuan Falun. Since I was so anxious to study it, I called a Dafa practitioner I had not spoken to for a long time. I told her that there weren't any Dafa books left in my home except unfinished hand-copied versions of Zhuan Falun, which lacked the last three lectures. Thus I went to her place three times to transcribe the text of the last three lectures. From then, I studied Zhuan Falun at home without my father's knowledge, as he was not a practitioner. Though my dad didn't agree with the persecution, he did not support my mom and me in practicing Falun Gong either. He just did not understand the truth about Falun Gong. After I resumed my study of Zhuan Falun, the fellow practitioner gave me Master Li's new articles from time to time. As I remember, I was expecting her to come every day, so I would be able to study the new articles on her palm pilot. She usually came to my place during lunch hour when there were no others around. While she was meditating, I sat on a tiny stool and studied Master's new articles eagerly. Afterwards, because my dad and I had to relocate to an urban area, my fellow practitioner gave me an e-book containing all of the Dafa books. At that moment, I was very excited as if I had received the most precious treasure in the world. When recalling the Dafa books that were confiscated by the evil police, I cannot help but feel sad. That was the first time I deeply felt the preciousness of Dafa books.
After my mom passed away, the evil police frequently went to my home and pressured me to sign a guarantee statement to quit Falun Gong. But they never contacted me directly, instead they just talked with my father. They came to our home several times a month, and they didn't leave until my dad shouted at them. He was very infuriated by the harassment. He was an ill-tempered person, so whenever the evil police came, he would fly into a rage. When I was still a junior in high school, one day my dad told me that the police called him and said that as long as I signed the statement, they would stop monitoring and harassing us. Upon hearing this, I was moved by the attachment of emotion. I replied that I would sign the statement, but I would still continue to cultivate Dafa no matter what the statement said. But my father said: "No, you should never sign the statement because you haven't done anything illegal. Why should you sign the statement?" When hearing that, I was immediately clearheaded. "Yes, I have done nothing wrong. Why should I sign a statement?" If I signed, it would mean that I intended to give up cultivating Dafa. That was something I should never do. So I was determined not to sign the statement. Soon after, my dad went to the police department and argued with the director. In the end the director apologized to my dad. Since then, the police never came to our place again.
Following Teacher in Fa Rectification
I moved to the city and began attending college. Because I didn't do well with the college entrance examination, I had to attend a municipal college, where I got acquainted with a lot of people. I just knew that they were all there for Dafa. I continued to make efforts to study the Fa in order to make up for the lost time, keep up with other practitioners and catch up with the progress of Fa rectification. I also learned from other practitioners how to download truth-clarification materials and teacher's new articles via the Dynamic Network. I never missed any new articles by Master. Master hopes that we will clarify the truth and save as many sentient beings as possible. Every word Master said touched me deep in my heart. I decided to set up my own materials site. At first I downloaded and printed truth-clarification materials at home because I did not have a computer in my dormitory. I would leave one copy of truth-clarification material on the bus, or give a copy to a vendor on the street. But I came to realize that this method was not forthright, so I decided to clarify the truth to my classmates directly. Because I was familiar with them, it was easy to bring the matter up. At the same time, I adjusted the truth-clarification materials according to their reactions. At that time, I wished to have a computer in my dormitory, so I could play truth-clarification videos for them or show them Dafa news directly. Within a short time I got a laptop from my father. I knew everything was arranged by Master.
Now I could download the video of "Fa Rectification in the World." I was crying while watching it by myself. The practitioners did a great job, especially the overseas practitioners. They flew to China from far away and told Chinese people, "Falun Dafa is good." I felt every cell in my body was shocked when I heard this sentence. It an extraordinary thing for these foreign practitioners to tell Chinese people the truth. Thus the Chinese practitioners should do Fa rectification better than before.
I made a decision to show the video for my classmates and help them to know the truth. At night, I returned to my dormitory from home and I did not want to waste my time because I knew that what I was doing was a great thing and it might save countless sentient beings if I did it very well. I then knocked on each nearby dormitory door and asked them to watch the documentary. A lot of students gathered together in my dormitory and they gazed at my charming laptop screen and watched the film quietly for an hour. I did not say anything after the movie, but I knew they began to think some questions over, such as, what Falun Gong really is, and what the truth is. More and more people learned the truth. I tried to make more new friends and take every opportunity to tell them the truth. Some listened to me seriously and some thought deeply, while some did not want to know the truth further. Anyway, I could not keep silent. When meeting somebody, the first thought I had was whether he or she had heard about the truth or not.
Under such a tough environment in China, I kept clarifying the truth in college by myself. Sometimes I felt isolated and could not find anybody to share cultivation experiences with or talk with. When the Nine Commentaries came out, I did not understand at first. But when I learned that Master told us to withdraw from the CCP, I quit the CCP and its affiliated organizations without hesitation. I downloaded the Nine Commentaries and read them three times. I knew I should not only tell others the truth about the Fa, but should also help them to quit the CCP. If I did not know about the CCP very well, it was impossible to help others know about it well. Then I began to advise other people to withdraw from the CCP. At that time, I did not know how to start because I felt it was more difficult to advise others to quit the CCP than clarifying the truth. I started with my close friends and they decided to quit the CCP. Though the number of people quitting the CCP with my help was not too big, there were some who quit the CCP one after another. Some of my classmates did not quit, but I did not give up hope of opening their pure sides with my wisdom. I believed they would come to know the truth and quit the CCP one day. Three years later, when I graduated, I had a thought to study abroad and do Fa rectification in America.
Right Fruit and Blooming Lotus
Once I had the thought of going to the United States, I smoothly obtained my student visa and came to the United States within a few months. Everyone was surprised at how smoothly the procedures went. I know this is the cultivation path that Master arranged for me.
I clarified the truth, promoted the practice, and participated in experience sharing conferences with fellow practitioners in Utah. Every day in the United States was new for me. I could freely practice the exercises and study the Fa. I didn't know what could have been more blissful than that. Even though there are few Dafa disciples in Utah, we are not short of anything we should have; Master is watching over everything. Though the cultivation environment in Utah is not as tense or complicated as San Francisco or New York, the cultivation tests and frictions are no fewer. Whether it is personal cultivation, or doing Fa-rectification work, any aspect can reflect a practitioner's attachments. While continually eliminating attachments, everyone is becoming more and more mature, constantly rising in levels, and increasing the energy of the whole body.
After cultivating for so many years, "searching within" and "looking inward" have already become habits. Whenever a problem occurs, it must be that I have an omission somewhere. If I constantly emphasize others' faults, then that is helping others cultivate But when fellow cultivators have realized it and eliminated their omissions and risen up, what about myself?
On the path of cultivation, the more one cultivates, the more one discovers the preciousness of "looking inward" and "searching within." When "looking inward," as long as one is willing to let go of one's selfishness, the tests would pass very quickly. During discussions with fellow practitioners, sometimes I see their deficiencies, but when I carefully think about it, I wonder why I saw them. Is it because I have the same problem? When I carefully looked inward, I often found that I had the same problem, it is just that the manifestation at the surface was different. Sometimes, even the things that I once regarded as absolutely true are no longer absolute when I think about them. As long as something moves my heart, or I don't feel calm or comfortable about something, it is because there is an omission there.
When I see fellow practitioners' attachments and point them out with compassion and no sense of self, then I can really help fellow practitioners realize the problems that exist. But when fellow practitioners improve in cultivation, it is because they enlightened to it, endured hardship and gave it up themselves. When fellow practitioners improve, it is through their own efforts; therefore, I should not develop complacency.
Cultivation is a sacred and a very joyful matter. Amidst continual purging myself of attachments, I slowly enlightened to what "true freedom" is. I have been in the United States for half a year now balancing my studies, life and Fa-rectification work, which is also a manifestation of my cultivation state. Taking the Fa as the Master, everything will be handled very well, and it is a manifestation of truly stepping towards godhood.
