(Clearwisdom.net) I have been practicing Falun Dafa for nine years, and I deeply feel that Dafa is the highest and most wondrous cultivation practice. When I first obtained the Fa, I was serving as a Lieutenant Commander in the Chinese army. Since my wife did not live with me at the time, I vacationed to visit her each year. Nine years ago, when I went back I found that my father-in-law and my wife were both practicing Falun Gong. I picked up “Zhuan Falun” and read it through within a short time. I thought at that time what Master Li teaches in the book is very reasonable, so I began to cultivate myself. At first, I was too deeply deluded by ordinary society and the evil Chinese Communist Party's (CCP) theory of atheism to believe that Gods and Buddhas really existed, so at the beginning of my cultivation practice, Teacher used different methods to show me supernormal phenomena in order to strengthen my confidence in cultivation. Through these experiences, I finally began believing that Gods and Buddhas do exist, thus I stayed firm on the path of cultivation. Ever since I began practicing Falun Dafa, I have understood many principles and truths. The main ideas that struck me were, “Thinking highly of virtue and doing good deeds,” “Befriending others,” “Being a better person and doing good things,” and “Good rewarded with good, evil met with evil.” I suddenly came to understand many things that I didn't realize before.
I began to feel great admiration toward Teacher for I thought Teacher was very knowledgeable and knew a great many things. Through practice, I have gradually understood that human knowledge is nothing but the manifestation of the law of the universe on the lowest level, and that all the culture inherited from our ancestors is nothing but the cultural foundation for today's vast spread of Dafa.
I used to be a bit cranky, and it was easy to lose my temper. The other soldiers in my army unit were all scared of me. But once I practiced Falun Dafa, I changed a lot and I've learned how to forebear when things happen. I have often helped fellow soldiers do the cleaning and emptying of toilets, and I think little about money and self-interest. My desire for obtaining power has faded as well. At the same time my health has greatly improved - all of my illnesses have disappeared, including a duodenal ulcer, pharyngitis, and shoulder periarthritis. Thus I was able to believe all the more firmly in Dafa, and feel very devoted and happy.
But on “April 25,” 1999, since there were some practitioners who were “illegally arrested” by police in Tianjin, many practitioners went to Beijing to appeal according to the rights granted in China's constitution. All the practitioners there went home after a peaceful meeting with Prime Minister Zhu Rhongji. But since the evil dictator Jiang Zemin harbored a concealed grudge toward Dafa and Teacher, he insisted on suppressing and persecuting Falun Gong. On June 10, 1999, the “610 Office” was set up to oversee the persecution at every level of society, like a gestapo. The 610's first crime was in conducting a thorough investigation of all Falun Gong practitioners throughout the country. The army was also investigated, so my leader came up to me to get more information. I told him, “I do practice Falun Gong. As a practitioner, we only do good things and try to be better people. I do not and will not do bad things, so I am not frightened. Just put my name on the list.” At that moment, another leader came in and told us, “The CCP always promises that the masses will not suffer retribution, but in which movements did they not settle accounts with the masses? So it's better not to report him.” In this way, my name was not reported. Later, I was enlightened that due to my firm belief, Teacher protected me. This is the reason that I was not persecuted after July 20, 1999, when the official suppression was launched.
Later, I was informed that 108 practitioners were reported in the army. None of them escaped being expelled from the army, and some were illegally sentenced. After July 20, 1999, I was deluded when the evil started slandering Falun Gong all over the newspapers, radio and television. The deceitful lies were so numerous it felt like they blotted out the sky and covered up the earth. The leader in the army talked with me to add more pressure. Out of fear, I made the wrong decision of giving up cultivation practice. I destroyed all my Dafa books, thus making an unforgivable blunder. Yet deep in my heart I never really gave up cultivation, for I had come to understand that Gods and Buddhas do really exist. Just when I'd made up my mind to quit cultivating Dafa, at night I dreamed that Teacher came and asked me, “Do you still want to cultivate?” I answered, “No.” Teacher looked deeply regretful and turned to write a poem on a blackboard. I felt the poem was the one later published in “Hong Yin” with the title of “Self-evident is the Heart.” But at that time I did not enlighten to it and I left Teacher.
In the following days, deep in my heart I felt that I had committed a sin against Dafa and Teacher by destroying Dafa books and betraying Teacher, and that Teacher would never again take care of me. Thus I was kept so deluded in the big tribulation that I couldn't come to reason. But actually, Teacher never did give up on me. He used many ways to try to help me enlighten, yet I did not get it.
In early March, 2000, I was hit by a severe illness. At the beginning I felt that all my bones were broken, so I was put in a cast. But later it developed into such great pain all over my body that I couldn't move or straighten my back, yet medical examinations showed that there was nothing wrong with me. The pain hit me so badly that I took a lot of medicine. But after I took the medicine, my pulse slowed down to about 50 beats per minute. At night in my dreams, Teacher tried to have me enlighten once again by letting me experience the wonderful state of my past cultivation, namely when I knew that Teacher was protecting me. At that time I failed to understand the truth.
Teacher finally had me enlighten the next night. I chanted “Amitabha (May Buddha preserve us)” in my dream since I'd read a lot of Buddhist scriptures, when suddenly I felt the law wheel rotating rapidly in my belly, then suddenly leave my body and revolve above my head like a tornado, pulling my main consciousness right out of my body. At that moment, I enlightened that the law wheel Teacher granted to me was still there, and that Teacher was still protecting me and had never given up on me. My main consciousness meditated in the air and I calmed down. Not long after I eliminated all my human ideas, the law wheel and my main consciousness returned to my body. At that moment, I was fully awake. I feared nothing for I knew by then that I was completely under Teacher's benevolent care and protection. I told myself, “Whatever the result is-to die or to survive, with Teacher beside me, there is nothing to worry about.” With this idea emerging, a miracle happened: I heard a big crack and soon after all the pain in my body was gone. The next morning I threw away all the medicines.
Thus, after nine months of tribulation, in March 2000 I again stepped back onto the path of cultivating Dafa. Afterwards, to have me stay strong in belief, Teacher again showed up in my dream. Teacher said with compassion, “ You are back.” I couldn't help crying and I replied, “Yes, I am back.”
Teacher started to eliminate my karma after I took up cultivation again. I had loose bowels and I vomited severely at the same time for three consecutive days, but it only happened when I practiced the exercises in the morning. During the day everything was fine. But it scared my wife, and she urged me to go see a doctor. But I knew myself, it was Teacher cleaning up my body for me since I was away from Dafa for over nine months and my body had become badly polluted. Plus, I had taken a whole lot of medicine, which needed to be eliminated. After three days everything was all right again.
A greater tribulation followed. Whenever I read Dafa books, my brain reflected, “It is all false and deceptive, do not believe in it.” I then strengthened my righteous thoughts and firmed my belief in the “Fa” principles in Zhuan Falun. In particular:
“At some point you’ll be made confused about what’s true and what’s false, and you’ll doubt that gong really exists, that you can cultivate, that you can really go up there in cultivation, that there are Buddhas, that they’re real... You’ll experience this later on, and you’ll be given those false impressions, which make you feel that those things don’t exist and that they’re false, and it’s exactly to see if you can stay steadfast. If you say you want to steel your will, then with this thought, at that time you’ll really be able to do that, and naturally you’ll do well since your character has improved.”
Thus I eliminated all the interference and walked through the tribulation.
Later, tribulations came over to me when I practiced the exercises. Whenever I practiced, those Buddha scriptures would flash into my brain. They were all in ancient Chinese writings. I was startled that I could recite them. In fact I had not read them much. I then enlightened that it was all interference. So I tried all my best to eliminate it and felt Falun rotating in my brain to help me eliminate it. It was not until three months later that I overcame this tribulation. It was a big lesson for me to learn- never make the great blunder of taking up another way to practice.
Through my own experiences, I am aware that Teacher never ever will abandon even a single one of His Dafa disciples, and that no matter what blunder we make under pressure, Teacher will forgive us. This is our great benevolent Teacher! Teacher cherishes us more than we cherish ourselves! I feel so proud of our Teacher.
Through this tribulation, I let go of the attachment to life and death, and thus understood that life and death actually do not exist. As Dafa disciples, we do not have the so-called “birth,” and we do not have the so-called “death” either. It is only that we are now using the human body to cultivate ourselves and to validate Dafa. Thanks to letting go of this big attachment, in cultivation practice and validating the Fa, I have walked my path steadily without encountering major tribulations.
In the ensuing cultivation practice during the process of validating the Fa, with Teacher's care, I strictly stick to the requirements of Dafa to cultivate my character toward goodness and upgrade my level continuously, thus I walked through six years of cultivation smoothly. Of course, there were also times when I did not do well. Whenever I did not do well enough, Teacher would compassionately have me enlighten and help me to discover my problems and attachments. Following are some examples for the reference of fellow practitioners.
For quite a while, I was addicted to online games, which I knew was not right at all, but I could not control myself. One night I had a dream in which my seat on the bike was missing. I then was enlightened that it meant no seat left for me - wasn't it to say that my future seat was taken away? How terrible! I woke up with a start and put my foot down to get rid of the vice. During a certain period of time, I was attached to sex. At night I dreamed that my water pipe leaked, and I thus knew that I had a loop hole in my cultivation. Realizing my attachment, I decided to overcome it. Sometimes when I was in a good cultivation state, in my dream Teacher would let me fly up high to encourage me. When I slacked off with strong human attachments, I would fall from a high place in my dream to spur me to be more diligent.
With practitioners at home and abroad “clarifying the truth,” my cultivation environment has become more and more loose. Now I can read articles from the Clearwisdom website, and even publicly view Clearwisdom articles and other blocked websites at my work unit. Many people around me have already learned the truth. Some of them even went over articles on Clearwisdom themselves.
I will definitely strictly require myself to adhere to Dafa's standards and principles, and walk righteously my own path to achieve consummation and go back home with Teacher.
Category: Improving Oneself
