(Clearwisdom.net) I started to learn Falun Dafa in 1998. Since the start of the persecution of Falun Dafa by the Chinese Communist Party (CCP) in July 1999, I have written several articles to expose the torture I experienced, and what I have done to validate the Fa. I was "illegally imprisoned" in 2005 and missed the Second Internet Experience Sharing Conference in China. I am writing this article to describe my more recent experiences for the Third Internet Experience Sharing Conference. I hope that my fellow practitioners will point out to me any gaps they find in my cultivation.
In the spring of 2005, I was arrested along with several other practitioners. The agents of the CCP acted as if they were crazy: they handcuffed us, shackled us to metal chairs, took many pictures as "evidence," interrogated us several times, ransacked our homes and took away a lot of CDs and copies of the Nine Commentaries on the Communist Party and other printed Falun Dafa materials. I was taken to a detention center. I followed Teacher's instructions not to comply with any of their orders, requests, or demands. I also went on a hunger strike to protest the illegal imprisonment.
Although I suddenly found myself imprisoned, my heart was not moved. I knew that all of this craziness was just an illusion. I firmly believed in Teacher's words, "Remove your human thoughts and evil will naturally die out." (Hong Yin II) I knew I would get out sooner or later. How could the iron bars lock up my mind? I told myself that I should openly walk a smooth path. On the other hand, I was very regretful for having gaps in myself that gave the evil opportunities to interfere in our region's Dafa work and cause irreversible damage.
Nothing is accidental. I realized that no harm would come to me if I could meet the standards of the Fa. On the contrary, whenever I encountered a problem, it meant that I needed to get rid of some attachment. For example, the CCP agents confiscated many of the original CDs containing information about Falun Dafa that I had kept in my home. This was a reflection of my attachment to collecting things, an ordinary person's hobby, of which the agents easily took advantage. In this manner, I was able to often quietly look inward to analyze events and I found many attachments.
Teacher said, "More importantly, all of you should ignore what that saboteur in Hong Kong has instigated and not give her an audience" ("Drive Out Interference"). After a month at the detention center, I was taken to an infamous brainwashing center that is known to have tortured nearly one thousand Falun Dafa practitioners. At the brainwashing center, former practitioners who went down the wrong path took advantage of practitioners' benevolence and tried to coax them into "changing their comprehension of the Fa." In reality, they were trying to lead practitioners towards evil "enlightenment" and undermine their righteous beliefs. I realized that I should not cooperate with them and did not say a single word to them.
They then started to cite from Teacher's scripture, "A Suggestion," and tried to argue that I was not a real practitioner because I did not clarify the truth about Dafa. They were still trying to coax me into "sharing" with them. I knew it was just a trick played by the rotten demons that were controlling them and trying to ruin the Fa. Teacher told us to clarify the truth to people, but these people who had "enlightened" along an evil path were totally controlled by evil, rotten spirits, and their fate was to be eliminated. So I remained silent and kept sending forth righteous thoughts. I only clarified the truth when their human sides emerged or to regular employees who did not understand Dafa. By the standards of the Fa, I could clearly tell whether I was confronted with a person or an evil spirit, although the evil had clothed itself with human skin. Nobody was able to shake my conviction.
Since I did not talk to them, these collaborators started quoting Teacher's words out of context to show their level of so-called "enlightenment." In "Teaching the Fa at the Conference in Switzerland," a disciple asks Teacher: "Can they record themselves reading Zhuan Falun and then listen to it?" Teacher answers,
"Since you are a cultivator, before you consummate, everything you say carries various kinds of ordinary human messages. So when you play it back, you absorb them back. This repeated, reciprocal contamination isn't good."
Therefore, I realized that I should not listen to what they were reading at all. I would limit myself to reading Dafa books on my own and if I couldn't do that, I still would not listen to them reading. With Teacher's help, I was able to study the "Fa" frequently. I was also able to read Teacher's new articles.
The guards became irritated because I wasn't cooperative and some of them started to torture me. Teacher said in the article "Rationality,"
"The actions they are now adopting in the persecution of Dafa and its students are extremely evil and shameful, and they fear these will be exposed. You must let the world's people know about their evilness--this is saving people, as well. While eliminating the evil, you consummate yourselves and strengthen the Fa's manifestation in the world."
It describes exactly what the evil did. They tortured me in a closed room. Even the staff at the center did not know that they were torturing me and simply assumed that they were "helping" me in a friendly way. I realized that I should expose what they were doing. Whenever the police or the collaborators started torturing me, I would call out their names and what they were doing. My loud voice went very far, and made it even all the way to the Minghui/Clearwisdom website. This greatly frightened the evil and ended their two-week-long attempt to "transform" me.
When Minghui/Clearwisdom published details of my imprisonment and torture, my captors became afraid of me and angry. They started another round of trying to "transform" me. On one occasion, I did not guard my character well and behaved badly towards someone who was assigned to monitor us. One of the policemen hysterically cursed me and said a lot of bad things about Dafa and Teacher. I was shocked and immediately realized that my own unrighteous thoughts within this bad environment were being used by the evil as an excuse to induce ordinary people to violently abuse practitioners and defame Dafa and Teacher. I kept sending forth righteous thoughts and made adjustments, maintaining righteous thoughts of benevolence and harmony which caused the policeman to calm down. From then on, no matter how underhandedly the guards tried to deceive and irritate me, I was not disturbed. Their second attempt to "transform" me, which lasted one and a half months, was also a complete failure.
On the one hand, the evil forced and coerced other practitioners to report on my activities. They then tried to make me acknowledge everything to have a reason to increase the torture. On the other hand, they claimed that the Minghui/Clearwisdom website had used me as an example and therefore they would also give me special treatment. Shortly afterwards, they started their third and most vicious round of torture and attempt at "transformation." They took me to a remote place because they were afraid that I would shout. They used many brutal methods to torture me, including depriving me of sleep, and beating, scolding and verbally abusing me. The people who had "enlightened" along an evil path were reading to me from books of other cultivation methods and from the articles of Mao Zedong, the former leader of the CCP. Teacher said, "I hope that students don't listen to or believe their evil lies" ("Suffocate the Evil"). Since Teacher used the words "don't listen to or believe," I realized that not only should I not believe but neither should I listen. If I listened, bad things would enter my field. So I either recited the Fa silently or sent forth righteous thoughts, asking Teacher to help block their words from reaching my ears. Eventually, they even shouted directly into my ears, but I was not moved at all. Teacher was protecting me. Even if they forced their way into my field, I would not acknowledge or accept them. Many times, when their lies reached my ears to interfere with me, Teacher helped me think of the relevant righteous Fa to clear the evil out. This strengthened my understanding of the Fa. I understood that as long as I maintained a firm heart in Dafa, Teacher would resolve all trouble and danger.
Later, I thought of Teacher's poem, "Hurry Up And Tell Them": "As Dafa disciples clarify the truth, Sharp swords shoot forth from their mouths." I realized that I should not just be silent and passive. Dafa practitioners' words have power and can themselves eliminate interference. Therefore, I combined all considerations into one sentence, "Falun Dafa Is Good," and kept repeating it. The individuals who had "enlightened" along an evil path were not able to stand it and one started to sing CCP songs to drown out my voice and righteous energy. In response, I sang the song, "Falun Dafa Is Good." That person could not bear it and asked others for reinforcement and to torture me. I guarded my character and spoke loudly to let everyone know exactly how they were mistreating me. Some of them started beating me, shouting, "How strong your competitiveness is." I was about to answer them, "There is nothing wrong in singing 'Falun Dafa Is Good.'" However, just to be sure, I looked inward to see if I had any competitiveness. I then purified my mind and just kept peacefully saying, "Falun Dafa Is Good," and singing Dafa songs.
I became increasingly clear about what I should do. I steadfastly refused to follow my captors' orders, and kept sending forth righteous thoughts and clarifying the truth to clear up my environment and rectify everything that was not righteous. In addition, in response to everything I observed or heard, I quietly looked inward to discover my attachments. I then started to get rid of the attachment, thus purifying myself. I also told the collaborators that they had had the attachment of competitiveness when they clarified the truth about Falun Dafa in the past, and that this was the reason why they had been arrested. Unfortunately, they did not look inside to find and eliminate their competitiveness. They rather treated truth-clarification as if they were fighting with ordinary people and thereby denied Teacher and Falun Dafa. They were blaming the steadfast practitioners for not looking inward, although they were the ones who ended up interfering with truth-clarification, Falun Dafa, and Teacher. I explained how I looked inside myself in response to every sentence I heard, because this is what Teacher had told us to do and Teacher's Fa is harmonious. Using an incorrect mind to do something does not mean that the thing should not be done. After getting rid of the underlying attachment, we should correct ourselves and do what we are supposed to do. However, they were lost in delusion and would not listen. This conceptual battle lasted for ten days and, as before, my opponents lost in the end.
Six months later, I was taken to another prison that was infamous for its faked "kindness." The agents of the CCP there knew that I had gone through severe torture previously and that violence could not force me to change my mind. They faked a "good cop" approach, and tried to deceive me. At that time, I had just decided to no longer accept hardship and torture but to take the chance to clarify the truth about Falun Dafa and clear the environment. The CCP agents wanted to take advantage of my benevolence to "transform" me, but I followed Teacher's words. They thought they were utilizing me, but actually I was utilizing them.
The police and the collabaorators claimed that they had identified one of my shortcomings and told me that I did not know ordinary people's manners. A policeman put his cup on a table and asked me to pour water for him, claiming that he was trying to help me to fix my shortcomings. In fact, he was maliciously testing a Falun Dafa practitioner. I recalled an incident in the previous brainwashing center where a policeman once asked me if I had any evil thoughts. I answered without much consideration, "Yes, but I am trying to get rid of them during my cultivation." The policeman then slapped my face brutally. I shouted, "So and so is beating me." At the same time, I started looking inward. I realized that when facing the evil, we are great Falun Dafa practitioners and we are to rectify everything unrighteous. Why should we exhibit our shortcomings to them and give them opportunities to persecute us? Recalling Teacher's words, I realized that Falun Dafa practitioners should never acknowledge a test arranged by the old forces and that we should cultivate ourselves while denying their arrangements. Consequently, I did not respond to the policeman at all this time. I said to myself, "A Falun Dafa practitioner does not need your 'help' or your 'test.' Falun Dafa practitioners should be able to correct themselves once they find their own shortcomings." Eventually, the policeman said, "I admired your braveness when you didn't pour water for me. If you had poured water for me, I would have also admired your willingness to fix your shortcomings." I said to myself, "I don't care whether you think I am good or bad. I am just following Teacher's Fa." This phase of truth-clarification and elimination of negative influences lasted for about a month. In the end, everybody admired the firmness, wisdom, and courage of Falun Dafa practitioners.. They understood many things although they did express them openly.
At that time, I openly used a Falun Dafa practitioner's righteous thoughts to rectify everything unrighteous. I also realized that if I didn't have any gaps in cultivation, I would not have been tortured at all, although conditions were very vicious. Sometimes I was at a loss for words when I was criticized, feeling sorry for myself. If I had eliminated my loopholes, they would not have dared to take advantage of me. In my heart, I corrected my shortcomings so that I could fulfill a Falun Dafa practitioner's duty with a purer mind. Teacher benevolently helped my understanding at every step along the way. I remember that when I was first imprisoned, the light bulb in the room burned out and was fixed three times. I realized then that Teacher was telling me to "destroy" the evil and "fix" my attachments. That evening I felt myself to be extremely huge when sending forth the righteous thoughts. I realized that I was strengthened by Teacher.
Whenever I had the chance, I would look inward. I started to slack off a bit after about a year of imprisonment. Just then, Teacher arranged for me to read his new article, "The Closer to the End, the More Diligent You Should Be." I was jolted and found my attachments to selfishness. Subsequently, I could feel how my mind expanded. Shortly afterwards, I was released from prison for lack of evidence. The whole illusion ended when I gave up my human attachments.
When I was released, many people thought it was incredible. Everybody had expected that I would be sentenced to several years in prison or forced labor. They admired Falun Dafa and Dafa practitioners. My release was a manifestation of the power of righteous thoughts from all practitioners. Many practitioners sent forth righteous thoughts to help me and exposed on the website the injustices I suffered. Even though the Party's agents claimed that I was an exemplary case in their center, they really feared exposure of their crimes overseas and eventually retreated because of rescue efforts by practitioners around the world. In the end, everything turned out well for me and I even landed a job. I found a decent job by openly telling my employer that I was a Falun Dafa practitioner. Falun Dafa gave me the wisdom to do an excellent job at work and to validate the Fa in everyday society. At the same time, I have the opportunity to clarify the truth about Falun Dafa and to persuade people to renounce their CCP membership.
In closing, let me share with fellow practitioners Teacher's poem, "Don't Be Sad" in Hong Yin II:
"Imprisoned as you are, don't be sorrowful or sad
Carry on with righteous thoughts and actions, and the Fa is with you
Calmly reflect on the attachments you have
Remove your human thoughts and evil will naturally die out"
