(Clearwisdom.net)
I often had trouble settling down when studying the Fa. Even though I studied one lecture per day, and sometimes even two or three lectures, I could not stop drifting away from the Fa study. I could not meet the requirement of studying the Fa with a calm mind. Teacher mentioned in the "Fa-Lecture at the Conference in Florida, U.S.A.,"
"You have to calm your mind when you read it, and truly study it. Don't let your mind sneak away from you. Once your mind wanders off, you'll be studying in vain."
By studying this Fa lecture from Teacher, I felt that my previous Fa study form must be changed. So, I adopted this approach: Before studying the Fa, I sent forth righteous thoughts first to calm myself down. However, after only a few minutes, my mind started to drift away. I sent forth righteous thoughts again while asking Teacher to strengthen my resolve and eradicate all interference from other dimensions. But a few minutes later, my mind again started to wander. I knew it was my mind that was not settled, making me unable to achieve tranquility.
I also had the idea of memorizing the Fa, but never quite got around to it due to perceptions that I am old, my memory is not as good, and time was getting short. Yet recently I saw many practitioners sharing their experiences of memorizing the Fa on the Clearwisdom website, and there were many older practitioners, practitioners who had to take care of household chores, who had regular jobs, etc. Their experience deeply touched me. I need to compare my Fa study and cultivation with others. If my fellow practitioners can do it, I can too. Thus I started to memorize the Fa again, and asked four other practitioners to do it together. We encourage each other while memorizing the Fa. If we are not calm then we cannot even memorize one paragraph of the Fa. Only when we were settled and had a good understanding of the Fa (at various levels) could we memorize the Fa. One paragraph after another was memorized. Throughout the process, the Buddhas, Taos, and Gods within the book pointed out to me many Fa principles to which I had not enlightened before. I felt that memorizing the Fa once is better than reading the Fa a hundred times.
With ever more deeper understandings of the Fa, many attachments were more clearly exposed. I knew,
"To tell you the truth, the entire cultivation process for a practitioner is one of constantly giving up human attachments." (Zhuan Falun)
Every time I sent forth righteous thoughts, I cleansed my attachments, and gradually many were eliminated, yet my attachment of showing off was very stubborn. For example, during the group Fa study, I would show off that I read better than others. When others asked me about certain characters, I would tend to show off, and during experience sharing I felt I enlightened better than others and showed off. When others praised me, I felt even more inclined to show off. In a nutshell, I never missed an opportunity to show off. It already became a part of me, a natural response. I knew clearly in my heart about it, yet the attachment of showing off would manifest itself without any misgivings.
One day, I had memorized the Fa to page 72. Teacher said, "Showing off itself is a very strong attachment and a very bad attachment that a practitioner must relinquish." I had a thought that the attachment of showing off is so bad, I must get rid of it. The next day during the group Fa study, when another practitioner asked me about some words, the feeling in my heart was quite different from before. I tried to sense if I still had it, but where it used to be there was no longer anything, it was all gone. My attachment to showing off was gone! I was shocked. It was Dafa that broke down my attachment to showing off. I had improved my understanding of Teacher's words,
"Cultivation depends on one's own efforts, while the transformation of gong is done by one's master." (Zhuan Falun)
Ever since I started memorizing the Fa, I have done quite a bit of work saving sentient beings, and everything has gone smoothly. After my heart was filled with Dafa, there was no fear. Memorizing the Fa was to put the Fa into my head, and into all my body's particles. They are all high energy particles and they all have intelligence. The more we fill ourselves, the more power they have, and there is less room for fear. Teacher mentioned in many Fa lectures that we must study the Fa more and more, and study the Fa well. That was the one and only guarantee that we can send forth righteous thoughts well and save sentient beings.
Many practitioners in my area know that they should memorize the Fa, but just do not have the resolve to do so, afraid that they could not memorize it, afraid they would not have enough time, or afraid they could not be persistent. I believe these are all human notions that we should eliminate. With our Fa validation path in the final stage, I suggest that my fellow practitioners do not hesitate any longer, and start to memorize the Fa.
September 22 2006
