(Clearwisdom.net) It was March 22, 2004, just after 5pm. All of a sudden my legs and my heart were in pain. I knew that it was the evil forces causing trouble, and I started sending righteous thoughts. A few minutes later, a fellow practitioner came to my house, told me that another practitioner was in a very dangerous condition, and asked me to send forth righteous thoughts for him. I refused without thinking, because I was sending forth righteous thoughts to save myself. At first, I did not think I was wrong. A couple of minutes later, I realized how selfish it was that I didn't want to save others when they were in danger. My selfishness was thoroughly exposed.
The destination of our cultivation path is to become selfless, always consider others first, and thus reach consummation with righteous enlightenment. This time a fellow practitioner was having trouble at the same time as me. However, my situation was a lot of easier than his. He needed my help but I refused. At the critical point, the first thing I thought about was my self.
I have been cultivating for five years. How have I been doing? This test showed my problem. If I continue to be like that, can I be responsible for the positive elements in the universe in the future? Two minutes later, the practitioner who had come to ask for my help left and I realized I was wrong. Since I did not know who he was and where he lived, I missed the opportunity. Two days later, I found out that the practitioner in tribulation was a 70 year old military doctor who had skin ulcer on his back, which could have threatened his life. I could imagine how big that tribulation was. Then I joined two fellow practitioners to send forth righteous thoughts for him, three times in the morning and twice in the evening, each time for a half hour. In between sending forth righteous thoughts, we exchanged our understandings with him. He said that due to his profession, whenever he felt uncomfortable, he would think he was sick.
Eventually the elderly practitioner was sent to the hospital, and came out a month later. He told us that he had been sending forth righteous thoughts in the hospital as long as he had a clear mind. At the time when he had not felt so clear minded, he thought, "It is no good. I am going to die." Then he immediately thought, "I can't die. If I died, what would happen to the beings in my universe?" At the key point, he thought of the beings of his universe. That showed his righteous thoughts of thinking about others before oneself. Teacher could see everything and save him from the brink of death.
Since the fellow practitioner was admitted to the hospital, my heart felt very heavy and I felt sorry for him. It was we who did not do well, especially in the beginning when I refused to send forth righteous thoughts for him. I did not pay enough attention until I went to see him and saw his severe condition.
Through this incident, I learned a lesson. I did not have enough righteous thoughts facing the great tribulation of my fellow practitioner. I did not play the good role that I should play. From the Minghui Weekly Journal, I read many stories that when a practitioner encountered the tribulation of illness, there were always several fellow practitioners sending forth righteous thoughts for hours, sometimes even over ten hours. Teacher said that everything we do here is actually a big battle in other dimensions between the righteous and the evil. Our fellow practitioner must have been surrounded by layers of evil, demons and dark minions. We should send forth righteous thoughts to eliminate those evil demons and rescue our fellow practitioners. Now I understood this and here I am bringing it up.
Through this incident, I understood many things. "Selfishness" is the root of all our bad notions and attachments. I also realized that I was still constrained by the standards of the old universe. Thinking back, I did not pass many tribulations because I did not face them from the Fa's perspective. Thus those tribulations often became more severe. We should get up once we fall, but we should not always fall. We should not let ourselves fall at all. At this last period of validating Fa and saving people, I should walk every step with a clear mind on the cultivation journey arranged by Teacher, and truly become selfless, considering others before myself. I should meet Teacher's requirements and complete my duty of being "in control of Heaven and Earth, rectifying the human realm" (The Foretelling).
