(Clearwisdom.Net) [Editor's comments: Why has Falun Dafa attracted about one hundred million people since it was first introduced to the public in May 1992? Clearwisdom.Net has decided to issue some of the experience sharing articles written by Falun Gong practitioners in China before July 1999, in addition to publishing experience sharing and witness articles of the Fa rectification period. Regardless of where they are or whether they are still safe, what they wrote about their cultivation during the peaceful years are still a real record and witness to history.]
I am a soldier on active duty concerned with the academic administration at a military college. I started to practice Falun Dafa in February 1995. Looking back on my two years of cultivation practice, I have deeply realized it is Falun Dafa that let me understand the purpose of life -- to go back to my true nature. It is Teacher that let me understand the truth of being a human -- to assimilate to the characteristics of Truth, Compassion and Tolerance.
Teacher says,
"To tell you the truth, the entire cultivation process for a practitioner is one of constantly giving up human attachments." [Zhuan Falun, official translation] It is absolutely true that one's gong [cultivation energy] level is as high as one's Xinxing [mind or heart nature; moral character] level. Keeping Teacher's teaching in mind, I concentrated my efforts on cultivating my heart. I passed serious tests when I faced fame, personal gain and affection.
1. Falun Dafa Let Me Remove My Attachment to Fame, Personal Gain and Competing
Due to influences from my family, tradition and social circumstances, I was very aggressive and was very attached to fame, personal gain and competing, even when I was a kid. Since I began working twenty years ago, in being admitted to the CCP, getting promoted and being recognized, I progressed beyond my colleagues that were the same age as me and assumed I was above others. Later, I became a leading officer. Because I worked hard, I was always able to significantly improve the situation of the units that I was in charge of. Self-satisfied with my experience and abilities, I felt at ease and thought I had justly earned my superiors' trust and encouragement or the masses' praise. As time went on, I developed strong attachments for fame and competing. Whenever I did a project, I was eager for a reward. In the words of everyday people, I wanted to be judged. If someone said "No" to me, I would not accept it and felt bad. Whenever someone else did better than me, even a little better, I felt bitter. When someone was promoted to a higher level, I would naturally compare myself with him. It would be all right if he was older than me; otherwise I would be immediately jealous and felt it was unfair. For many years I struggled with a distorted, bitter mentality, which caused much karma. It is Teacher's Falun Dafa that dispelled the mist in my heart and purified my mind.
Every year the armed forces usually conduct several major evaluations on the basis of daily routines to determine the fate of an officer and his/her unit. During the years I was in charge of the basic level as a principle officer, almost all of our work was among the best and won so many awards that we had a saying, "We don't know what second place is." After starting to practice cultivation two years ago, I worked as hard as usual, but contrary to our expectation, my unit and I failed to get any awards. Many colleagues and some of our superior officers felt it was unfair and complained for us. At the time, I took it amiss and couldn't eat or sleep well because I hadn't studied the Fa well and my Xinxing or enlightenment ability was not high enough. I believed that as a practitioner I should have given no thoughts to these issues, but this did not come from my heart; instead, I tried to look for something from the Fa to extricate myself. In fact I hadn't let go of the attachments. In group study, I told my fellow practitioners about my problem. They helped me see my problem from inside based on the Fa. Teacher says in Zhuan Falun,
"In a conflict among one another, you should care less about various personal feelings and desires. While competing for personal gain, you want to improve your gong -- how can that be possible? Aren't you the same as an everyday person? How can your gong increase? Therefore, only by emphasizing Xinxing cultivation can your gong increase and your level be upgraded. " (Zhuan Falun)
Teacher says,
"In fact, individual efforts can change minor things in one's life. Some minor things can be altered slightly through individual efforts, but it is precisely because of your efforts for change that you may obtain karma. Otherwise, the issue of committing karma will not exist, and neither will there be the issue of doing good deeds or wrong deeds. When one insists upon doing things this way, one will take advantage of others and do wrong deeds. Accordingly, that is why cultivation practice requires time and time again that one should follow the course of nature since you will harm others with your efforts. If your life does not have something to begin with and you obtain what should belong to another person in society, you will owe that person a debt." (Zhuan Falun).
I realized my problem eventually after studying the Fa. Teacher helped me remove my attachments for fame, personal gain and competition through this test! Since then I have been completely at ease. Many colleagues couldn't understand it, so they assumed I was not striving to make progress. I just dismissed it with a smile, because I understood that Falun Dafa is a supernatural science and I should set strict demands on myself with supernatural principles. How could everyday people understand a practitioner's mentality? As I realized my problem and improved my Xinxing, I removed the attachment. At the end of last year, my unit was chosen as an advanced group and I was awarded as an excellent officer for cadet training. Not long ago, the superior level gave me the title of associate dean, but they still wanted me to work at the basic level. Without a word, I followed the order from the top. Someone said I became better after starting to practice and kept my mind on working at the basic level. With my understanding, it was the boundless Buddha's Fa that harmonized me, and I was also in harmony with the great Buddha's Fa.
I felt that the Xinxing test would not be over with just one or two tests. In the first half of this year, the issue of my promotion once again touched off my attachment for fame and personal gain. The college had four openings on the top level after the leading officers retired or were transferred. In everyday people's terms, I was qualified for the promotion. First, I was the only one that was evaluated as an excellent principle officer in charge of the basic level. Also, I had been involved with academic administration for a long time, during which I had led several advanced units. Finally, I was an associate dean but had never worked in the position, and my term had expired. I was supposed to be promoted at that time. But according to the standard of practitioners and the principles of Falun Dafa, it was not right. According to the principles of Falun Dafa, practitioners should be selfless, consider others first, and follow the course of nature. The principles were easy to understand, but when I ran into the problem, it was hard for me to keep my heart calm or to handle it. The superior officers talked to me on different occasions with words such as, "We have discussed your case and reported it to the high level," or, "We won't let the excellent people like you suffer losses." Many staff and officers told me that it should be my turn to get promoted. Those who didn't realize what was happening were even angry because they felt it was unfair to me. A few of them made jokes that they would jump from the top of the building. During those days I just couldn't keep my overturning heart at ease, but I knew I was a practitioner. When I read Teacher's words in the book,
"But normally when a problem arises, if it does not irritate a person psychologically, it does not count or is useless and cannot make him or her improve. Accordingly, his mind cannot get over it and is still bothered by it. It could be that his mind is hooked on it." (Zhuan Falun).
I realized my attachment for promotion, power and gain was still held deeply in my heart. That was the root of the problem. Teacher says,
"If something is yours, you will not lose it. If something is not yours, you will not have it even if you fight for it." "Ordinary people have their pursuits, and we don't seek them. As for what ordinary people have, we also aren't interested. Yet what we have is something that ordinary people cannot obtain, even if they want to" (Zhuan Falun).
As a practitioner, every step is a course in the sequence arranged by Teacher for improvement. Teacher wanted me to improve my Xinxing and cultivation level. After realizing my problem, my Xinxing improved and I took my rank and salary lightly. Following the course of nature, I was steadfast in my current work. With my own performance, I proved that Falun Gong practitioners were good people.
2. Falun Dafa Helped Me Remove My Attachment to Money
As an officer in charge of the basic level, I always received small favors from subordinates. But as a Falun Gong practitioner, I had to be absolutely clean on this issue. Teacher says,
"When someone is doing a wrong deed, he will not believe it if you point out to him that he is doing a wrong deed. That person indeed will not believe that he is doing something wrong. Some people evaluate themselves with the declined moral standard. Because the criteria for assessment have changed, they consider themselves better than others. No matter how the human moral standard changes, this characteristic of the universe remains unchanged, and it is the sole criterion that distinguishes good people from bad people. As a practitioner, one must then conduct oneself by following this characteristic of the universe rather than the standards of everyday people." (Zhuan Falun)
Most of those who were in touch with me in daily work were everyday people. They assumed it was right and proper to accept small favors. Anyway, they were everyday people, but I was a practitioner. I told myself not to accept a penny or take any gain from others; otherwise I didn't deserve to be a practitioner. At the beginning those people didn't understand me and even complained that I was not a reasonable person to work with, while others assumed I was a hypocrite. I just took no notice of them. I rejected gifts or invitations for banquets during last year and the first half of this year. However, out of their emotions as everyday people, some cadets sent some fruit, kids toys or native products to my home, so my wife made a list of eleven people who gave me the gifts. When they graduated, I sent them some local products from Dailian in return. I thought it would be good enough for me to accord with the demands for Falun Dafa practitioners. But from the beginning of this year, more people sent me more expensive gifts, including a gold necklace. It made me wonder why people kept sending me gifts and I couldn't stop it? Teacher says in "Expounding on the Fa,"
"How can the uncultivated side restrain your main thoughts or the side that has already attained the Fa? Having humanly fostered the evil demons, you allow them to capitalize on the loopholes in the Fa. When a tribulation arrives, if you, a disciple, can truly maintain an unshakable calm or be determined to meet different requirements at different levels, this should be sufficient for you to pass the test. If it continues endlessly and if there do not exist other problems in your Xinxing or conduct, it must be that the evil demons are capitalizing on the weak spots caused by your lack of control. After all, a cultivator is not an ordinary human. So why doesn't the side of you that is your original nature rectify the Fa?" ("Expounding on the Fa" in Essentials for Further Advancement).
As these words hit my heart, I realized what I did belonged to the category of everyday people's courtesy which demanded reciprocity; this was far from the standard for real practitioners. I hadn't let go of the attachment for money and gain deep in my heart. In the final analysis, it was a problem in my Xinxing and behavior. Thus, I realized it would be a false ban if I didn't ban it in my heart, and I couldn't complete my cultivation if I couldn't keep my heart peaceful.
3. Create a Legitimate Environment and Practice Cultivation in Openness and Dignity
We established our group practice site in April 1995, when we had only over a dozen practitioners. Gradually the group grew to about ninety people. But later, someone tried to interfere, and even claimed that officers on active duty were not allowed to practice cultivation and no one should provide a place for practicing exercises. Facing the situation as such, the practitioners were calm and confident. We understood that it was a test of the practitioners' Xinxing designed to test our belief in Falun Dafa and Teacher. Many of the practitioners kept the daily group practice at the site without a break. Teacher says,
"All of us are trying to be good people, and this is in the interest of society and mankind. Why can't we have a just and legitimate environment? " (from "The Fa Rectifies the Human Heart"). "Isn't how society treats us testing cultivators' hearts? " ("Cultivation Practice is Not Politics").
We realized we should create a legitimate environment for practicing cultivation in openness and dignity. Our group handled the problem this way: at first, facing the interference and opposition, we had no argument and held no grudge, and treated it as a good opportunity to improve our Xinxing so as to be more confident. No indoor place for us -- we went outdoors; no yard for us -- we went outside; no group practice allowed -- we practiced at home. We changed our practice site nine times during the last two years, but we have never changed our minds about studying the Fa and cultivating our hearts. Secondly, all of us fulfill our work responsibilities conscientiously and correctly handle the relationship between cultivation and work. In keeping with ordinary people's situation in the society, none of us have showed off our supernormal abilities or lost our senses. We have kept cultivation in openness and dignity. At last, we used our words and deeds to prove that Falun Dafa practitioners were good people, and better models among everyday people. It was the best way to spread the Fa. The situation of our practice site was getting better and better. Those who used to be against us did not interfere anymore. The practitioners who used to do exercises at home came back to the site. It has been proved that we should treat ourselves as real practitioners and be free from interference by power and influence. Only by maintaining our Xinxing and cultivating firmly can we create a legitimate environment for cultivation in genuine openness and dignity.
Following the principles of Falun Dafa, I will keep practicing cultivation, remove attachments and assimilate to Truth, Compassion and Tolerance, and be an enlightened person that lives completely for others.
Written on October 31, 1997
