(Clearwisdom.net) I sat in the waiting room with my eyes closed. Gradually my mind went beyond the tiny space filled with the tensions of parents with high hopes, and nervous children awaiting their turn in the competition. Immersed in warm, soothing energy, I could only feel the beauty of emptiness.
"Mom!" Rongrong's voice brought me back. She was standing in front of me with her music under her arms, calm and composed. I asked, "Are you done?" She nodded affirmatively.
In the following few days, she went on with her studies, did her homework, and practiced the piano as usual, as if she had forgotten about the competition altogether.
Rongrong's piano teacher called to tell us that Rongrong had won first prize in her age group for 2003. She said that the awards ceremony would be held at New York City's Carnegie Hall, and that Rongrong would perform.
Although it was not that much of a surprise and she had not been thinking about the outcome of the competition, Rongrong felt excited about winning for a while. She said to me seriously, "Mom, I realize now that as long as you do not care too much about winning or losing, and put your heart into the notes, you will play the most beautiful music." I said to her, "Rongrong, I am so glad that you have learned the importance of focusing on the process with no pursuit of the outcome. As long as you do your best with a calm mind, the results will occur naturally. She nodded.
It was two months ago that Rongrong's instructor registered her for the competition. Although she loves playing the piano, she was already very busy with her homework. She did not have much time to practice her skills. As the day approached, the instructor became more and more strict with her, ensuring that she got every note, as well as the artistic style, just right.
Rongrong felt very stressed. As time went by, her performance did not improve and more problems arose, she even had trouble remembering pieces that she was very good at playing. She could not complete a 10-minute piece at one sitting. She felt very anxious, which was unlike her, and she seemed to have lost control of her fingers. She came to me, crying, "Mom, I can't do it. What if I lose?" Her distress was evident.
I realized that I had not talked to her about focusing on the process instead of the outcome. It was a good opportunity to help her improve and I had not done that. I put my arms around her and said, "Rongrong, why do you think Mom and Dad take you to piano lessons?" "It's because I love music." she murmured.
"That's right! Mom and Dad do not send you to learn a skill so you can compete with other people. It's because you love music. We want you to learn an instrument so you have something relaxing to do at the end of the day when you have finished your homework." She calmed down right away.
"The instructor recommended you for the competition because she thought you were good at playing the piano. She is strict with you, just like we make sure that you eat properly. I don't think you should be thinking about whether or not you will win first prize. All you have to do is calm down, do the best you can, and that's it." She listened attentively and gradually lightened up.
I asked her, "Do you remember what Master Li said about the person who was so obsessed with going to university, but without doing his best he failed to be accepted in the end? It is the same with practicing the piano. How can you win if you are so anxious that you cannot concentrate?" I opened her music and pointed to the notes, "Do you think the notes are little beings? If you command them with your pure heart to dance on the keyboard, they will make beautiful music for sure."
Her eyes brightened up with a sweet smile. "OK! Let me conduct the notes to dance!" Since then, beautiful, relaxing melodies come out of her piano.
May 21, 2003
