Shared at 2003 European Falun Dafa Conference
(Clearwisdom.net) Greetings to our Master!
Greetings to all fellow practitioners,
My name is Amy and I'm a 22-year-old American living in Madrid. I have known Falun Dafa since June 2000.
Two and a half years ago I was sitting at sunset in a soybean field. I prayed to know what was truth and righteousness and I wanted to embody it in every way. I said that it did not matter if this truth had one God, three Gods, 14 Gods, or no Gods, I just wanted to know what truly was goodness. I meant this with all my heart. Three days later a co-worker of mine gave me Zhuan Falun and looking back I can see that the Universe had answered my prayers. This book has taught me right from wrong and has taught me what is truly good in the cosmos. As Master says in "Lunyu":
"Only through "the Buddha Fa," can the mysteries of the universe, time-space, and the human body be completely unveiled. It is able to truly distinguish what is righteous from evil, good from bad, and eliminate all misconceptions while providing what is correct."
I learned about Falun Dafa in June 2000, almost one year after the persecution of Falun Dafa began. Ever since I heard Zhen Shan Ren (Truthfulness, Compassion and Tolerance) in my heart I new Falun Dafa was good. Despite this, the persecution occurring in China really was an obstacle for me. I'm not Chinese and have never been beaten or tortured, so mentally I felt quite challenged. The Chinese propaganda put many doubts in my mind for a long period of time about what Falun Dafa was. Yet I couldn't stop practicing Falun Dafa because I new in my heart it was so good and something that was put in my life for a reason.
I felt like because my attachments were too strong, the evil propaganda of the persecution made my mind fluctuate up and down. Thus I never was able to develop solidly as a practitioner. It was as if I couldn't ascend in cultivation and stayed stagnant.
Then in December of last year all of my doubts came to a climax and I felt overwhelmed and confused for about two weeks. It got to the point where I had to make a decision. Was I going to continue to let these negative and irrational thoughts control my life or was I going to take control of myself and cultivate in Falun Dafa as my heart truly wanted to?
I decided to take control of my life, my heart, and my mind.
I began by just rejecting all of these negative thoughts when they came up. I refused them. At times I felt that I didn't want to let go of these thoughts. I thought they had some kind of logic, but this was a kind of trick, because when I looked at these thoughts from a higher level, they were very irrational. Thus when I could see those thoughts for what they were, I rejected them and put Zhen Shan Ren first instead. I have learned through Falun Dafa that our main consciousnesses are very powerful and if we decide to let the negative thoughts, doubts, and fears control us, they will control us, but if we decide with a very determined heart that we want to take control of ourselves and live by Zhen Shan Ren, all of the negative thoughts will go away and instead Compassion will fill our hearts.
And my experience with Falun Dafa now has been amazing. I feel as if my heart is growing bigger and bigger, my mind clearer and clearer, I feel more and more compassion, and want to help others more and more in a deeper and more profound way. I finally took control of my heart and saw the Chinese propaganda for what it is--lies--and saw the greatness of Dafa.
In "Teaching the Fa at the 2002 Fa Conference in Philadelphia, U.S.A.," Master says, "As I've said, everything that happens today in the ordinary society is the result of Dafa disciples' thoughts. Even though the old forces do exist, if you don't have those thoughts they can't do anything." Before, when I didn't have righteous thoughts and tried to clarify the truth, people didn't really listen, they weren't moved. But now, it's like Master's poem, "Hurry up and Tell Them". Master says:
"As Dafa disciples tell people the facts,
It's like sharp swords shooting out together from their mouths,
Shredding apart the rotten demons lies.
Lose no time and save them, hurry up and tell them."
Now when I talk to people I always try to keep a righteous mind and also send forth righteous thoughts and their attitudes are changed from the beginning. They seem so happy to know Falun Gong. For example, there are various Chinese stores near my house and ever since I moved there I shop in the Chinese stores and clarify the truth when I get the chance. Before my heart became clear, most of the Chinese people that I talked to were against Falun Gong. But now it's changed. For example, in one store there is a Chinese family who at first said bad things about Falun Dafa. But one day my mind was very clear and I was sending forth righteous thoughts with all of my heart as I shopped in their store. At the cash register I gave the owner a Chinese newspaper and he said, "Can you read Chinese?" I said, "No, but I can read Zhen Shan Ren, and pointed to my button, which said Zhen Shan Ren in Chinese". Then he said, "Oh, Zhen Shan Ren is very good." Of course, I agreed with him and was very surprised at his change of heart. Then a few days later, his wife asked to learn the exercises.
This seems a very simple story, but to me it proves the power of Dafa and the power of righteous thoughts.
For many years I have been a pretty depressed person, and even after I was introduced to Dafa I still felt depressed at times because I wasn't truly cultivating. I was attending Dafa activities and doing Dafa "work," but I still was holding on to many attachments. So I kept having many ups and downs. But to be honest, ever since I took charge of my mind, and decided to let go of those negative thoughts and cultivate my heart according to Truthfulness, Compassion, and Tolerance, it's like every day is the best day of my life. Dafa has truly lifted my depression from its roots. And now when I clarify the truth, I try my best to have righteous thoughts and base all my actions in Truthfulness, Compassion, and Tolerance.
I just wanted to share my experience, because there may be other practitioners both inside and outside of China that feel doubtful about Dafa because of what the Chinese government says. It's possible to break though this. The Chinese government has brainwashing classes in their labor camps, but they also do this on a larger scale. They have tried to brainwash the whole world. This is incredibly sad, because Falun Dafa is good.
Thank you everyone for taking the time to come to this conference. It's a great opportunity to share experiences, grow together, and help clarify the truth to all the people of the world. Also I want to take this opportunity to thank Master Li for giving me the opportunity to purify my heart and mind and the opportunity to help others in a very profound way.
