I've cultivated for more than four years now. As I've come this far after the many stumbles on my path of cultivation, I've increasingly felt the power and dignity of Dafa, the immense sacredness of being a "Fa-Rectification Period Dafa Disciple" and what an enormous responsibility this is.
Prior to obtaining a copy of Zhuan Falun on March 7th, 1998, I had thought that it is a book dealing with qigong. But when I opened the book and found "Lunyu" and saw the first sentence "The Buddha Fa is most profound" I said to myself, "this deals with the Buddha Fa?" I was struck and stared at those few words for a long time. As soon as I saw that sentence I accepted it and decided to cultivate right then, and I have been steadfast. But as I've come this far, I've found that even now there's still a doubt whether I can be steadfast and keep my faith in Dafa. I was steadfast back then and I'm still steadfast today, but, let's say that they both appear to be a piece of steel on the surface; the elements of one have changed, though, and their sturdiness really cannot be compared. What has made me more and more steadfast, though, and where the strength of my faith comes from is this Fa of the cosmos.
Be Diligent Without Letting up; Be Merciful to Sentient Beings
I remember before I started cultivation I used to think, "How wonderful it would be to have lived during Sakyamuni's time and listen in person to his teaching on the Fa!" I really envied his disciples! Now I've become a disciple of the Lord of the Cosmos, a Dafa disciple during the Fa-rectification period. How much will people in the future envy us? They will pass legendary stories around about us, things like how we can just sit here and think about cleansing the bad thoughts from our minds and about karma, and they'll be eliminated; and how, as soon as we erect our palms, we can eradicate the evil beings that damage Dafa. They might say, "If I had lived in that time, I would treasure it tremendously and would try extremely hard." I live in this exact moment right now. What should I do? Am I treasuring it?
Our venerable Master said in "Teaching the Fa at the 2002 Fa Conference in Boston," "You need to be worthy of the title 'Fa-rectification period Dafa disciple'! That's something that the cosmos won't have again. This only happens once since the beginning of time - it only happens once since the beginning of time in the cosmos."
It's never happened before, and it will never happen again! For countless times, these words of Master's have powerfully impacted my mind and heart. Whenever I think of these words I feel extremely ashamed, because when I'm not diligent, I'm not treasuring this opportunity, which has never come by throughout the ages, and I'm not being responsible to sentient beings. I don't have the right to say, "Oh, I know I'm not diligent." Since I already know that I'm not diligent, why am I still not diligent? I belong to the sentient beings that are awaiting me, to the new universe, and I have no right to not be diligent.
Master said in "Rationality," "...everything you are currently doing has already established the most magnificent and eternal mighty virtue for Dafa and Dafa cultivators. When this page of history is turned, the people who remain will see your magnificence, and the future Gods will forever remember this magnificent time in history." As I enjoy this most privileged title [Dafa cultivator] that all being in the cosmos envy, I ask myself, "Do I deserve it?"
In "Teaching the Fa at the Great Lakes Fa Conference in North America," Master also said, "I knew that if the students were to bear it, it would be very hard for them to make it through. So I could only let the students bear the evilness played out by human beings, whereas I bore the real things," One article on the Clearwisdom website said that a disciple saw Master had been pierced all over his body with nails that are 9 inches long; that Master had to have all the blood in his body renewed; and that righteous Gods were kneeling on the ground, crying. After July 20, 1999, the kind of things Master's body had to endure is indescribable. How should I conduct myself in order to be worthy of Master bearing all this for us?
I read an article on the Clearwisdom website in which a disciple whose Third Eye is open said that our Master kept trying to figure out a way to help those disciples who are not diligent to catch up; in the end Master thought of a way - drink poison for them. How large was that bowl? It was as tall as an 800-story building! This is what our venerable Master has done for the disciples who are not diligent!
Sometimes when my thoughts were not righteous, I would immediately remind myself that I must make all my thoughts righteous. I thought to myself that when a disciple does not regard himself as a cultivator it would permit the evil to question Master, "This is your disciple? How come he doesn't even have righteous thoughts?" I tell myself that I must not humiliate Master in front of the evil because of me! Ever since I had this thought, whenever I have attachments emerge, I ask myself to immediately look within and not give the evil any chances!
Master said in Zhuan Falun, "Without knowing the Fa at high levels, one cannot practice cultivation. Without cultivating one's inner self and one's xinxing, one cannot increase gong." I know that Falun Dafa is the Fa of the cosmos; that what I am cultivating is no minor cultivation way, and that the moment I obtained Zhuan Falun I had obtained the high-level Fa, but only now have I realized that I had only entered the gate of a righteous Fa, whereas to know the Fa at high levels I have to continually study the Fa, continually improve my level, and take every step according to the cultivation path arranged by Master. When Master taught the Fa in Boston, I was there. Master said, "There are a lot of things you still aren't able to do well as Dafa disciples, though, and I can tell you that this is in fact because you've neglected Fa-study. The reason is, your surface, which is still assimilating to the Fa, needs to be constantly improved, and as you constantly improve, the things that you need to cultivate away have to be arranged for. Every realm has its own state of being. If you remain stagnant, you definitely won't be able to keep up with the Fa-rectification." When I heard that, tears immediately ran down my cheeks. I knew that I was not diligent enough, and therefore I hadn't reached the realm I was supposed to reach, and if I hadn't reached the realm I was supposed to reach, I would not able to keep up with the process of Fa-rectification. I would also not be able to do well in the Dafa work I'm responsible for, and it would bring losses to the Fa.
Look Inward and the Evil Will Self-Destruct
Master said, "Precisely because in this physical dimension we have this pair of eyes, people receive a false impression and are prohibited from seeing things. Thus, in the past it was said that if people did not believe what they could not see, such people would be regarded by the community of cultivators as having poor enlightenment quality, as being deluded by the false impression of everyday people, and as being lost among everyday people. This is a statement historically made by religions. Actually, we have also found it quite reasonable." (Zhuan Falun)
Sometimes when I came across something, when judged by the principles on the surface, I was right, and perhaps when I looked back on it later I was still right, but how can I examine myself this way? Is everything wrong someone else's fault, and I'm completely correct? It was very difficult to look within at these moments. I came across things like this a lot. I told myself to listen to Master's words and to maintain my xinxing, no matter what others do. Actually, when I thought about "no matter what others do," I was already looking externally and those were already human thoughts, so even when I was able to let go of my attachments at the time, the thoughts would re-emerge once in a while and would even make me feel wronged and I would remember those things for a long time. I found that even though I was looking inward, I did it with much difficulty and was cultivating in a difficult manner. Yet after a lot of bumps on my path, I still did not completely change that state.
Through studying the Fa continuously, the principles of the Fa made me realize from deep inside that these things were nothing in themselves, and what is important is that through these things I was told what attachments I should cultivate away, which level I should ascend to, and what principles of the Fa I should come to realize during this period of time. Even when I hear about things that have to do with other people, it helps me realize something, to give me a hint on something or to have me eliminate my attachments. Master said in "Dafa is All-Encompassing," "Everything you, a cultivator, encounter is related to your cultivation and Consummation, or else those things absolutely would not exist." Once I understand this principle of the Fa, will I still blame others? Now when I think back about those things I find them silly and find myself having been too deeply deluded amidst everyday people.
Sometimes, when something happens, if I was having a hard time getting through it and always dwell on the details, being unable to break out of them, I asked myself: "Would a God think like this? Would a Buddha think like this?" The answer is definitely "No." And then I would be able to get over it.
After "Dafa is All-Encompassing" was published, I've read it many times. Master said, "So a cultivator needs to let go of all the notions and principles of everyday people, and only then can he cultivate to a high level and break out of the Three Realms, the reverse of the cosmos." Everything I come across is testing me whether I want to be a human being or a God, and whether I can regard myself as a cultivator, abandon what my flesh eyes see and what my human heart feels, and look at it with the cosmos' high-level, righteous principles of the Fa. Of course, this is easy to say, whereas during tribulations the painful tests of my xinxing were peeling off my human skin. One time last year my human skin was too thick to be peeled off. Having cultivated for three years, I actually lay in bed for a day and a half and did nothing - I was defeated by my human attachments that I couldn't let go of. The difference between ordinary people and cultivators is that ordinary people obtain things through their efforts and pursuits, whereas cultivators have to let go of everything in order to gain. Completely letting go of everything means letting go of all my attachments. Now when I look back at the tribulations, they were nothing. The person defeated is a human - a righteous God would never be defeated!
Actually, what the evil fears is that we look inward. They always persecute Dafa disciples with the excuse that we're not righteous enough. If every one of us looks inward, then they will not only be unable to find an excuse [to persecute us], but also be unable to find an excuse to exist in this cosmos, and they will have to be destroyed! Oftentimes I have found that after I peel off several layers of my human skin, my way of thinking grows further apart from that of human beings and gets closer to those of Buddhas' and Gods, my understanding of the Fa becomes clearer and I become more steadfast in the Fa.
Being Resolved to Correct My Temper
I remember when I first obtained the Fa and read the article "What is Forbearance," when I read the sentence, "To endure completely without anger or grievance is the forbearance of a cultivator," I thought, "What kind of forbearance is it if a person has no anger or grievances? If he wants to vent his anger, he can't. And only when he stifles his anger is it considered forbearance?" I used to be very dissatisfied with the work of another practitioner and every time I angrily called him I would send him a lot of de. For more than six months last year, I called this practitioner almost on a daily basis and sent him de. He accepted everything with a smile whereas each time I couldn't maintain my xinxing. Even when I was able to occasionally forbear it, I felt disturbed inside and vented my anger at another practitioner.
It was not until the last two months that I have realized that all kinds of attachments have been concealed behind my temper - all attachments imaginable are included. My temper had become the best protection for their not being destroyed. I recall when I was only five, I was arrogantly ordering people who were a lot older than me to do things. My mother has criticized me many times how I used to criticize my father, as if I was giving a lesson to a three year-old child. No one in this world could restrain me until after I finished reading Zhuan Falun for the first time, when I thought to myself: "Great, now someone will keep me under control."
Master said in the Lecture in New Zealand, "I've just said that a person has the characteristics of his being. But with regard to becoming angry, this isn't one's inborn nature. I can tell you that when a person becomes angry it's absolutely caused by his demon nature. Why? Someone might think: "I had good intentions. I lost my temper in order to teach him to behave himself." Or, "I lost my temper in order to make him do a good job." That's also caused by demon nature, and it's also called "fighting evil with evil," as you were using the demon nature to make others do good things." One time, I was not happy with a practitioner's work and got really angry. I sat down and carefully experienced the state I was in when I was angry. I found that my mind and rationale were completely consumed by anger. I couldn't continue to do the things I was supposed to do, and I felt constricted inside. Due to my anger I wasn't able to continue to do my Dafa work well. Who would be happy about it? For the first time, I clearly realized that the state of mind I was in would make the demons that cause damage to Dafa the happiest, and that the demons were using the demon nature in me to interfere with my clarifying the truth and sending forth righteous thoughts. I'm sending forth righteous thoughts to eradicate the evil every day, so why don't I decisively eradicate the demon nature in myself? I started to search for the reason why I became angry, and then I realized that losing my temper was only a phenomenon that manifested itself on the surface. The fact is that at that moment some certain attachments in me were provoked they would jump out. Those were actually the best opportunities to see through them with a clear mind and eliminate them.
Later, I looked inward with a calm mind and I was able to quickly find a problem I've had for decades; that is, whenever I encountered a problem I would always blame others first. I quickly eliminated these bad thoughts and maintained my righteous thoughts. I had a real experience in the advantage of looking inward from what happened. Later on, I had a few other tests and was able to pass them smoothly. Now I have experienced what Master said about enduring "completely without anger or grievance." I can't explain that feeling with words; it's not that your heart will be like a pond of still water, rather, it's a kind of happiness - a kind of happiness that only cultivators have and that comes from Forbearance. This happiness results from my having broken through my delusion with the principles of the Fa.
The Power Comes from the Fa
One time I was reading Zhuan Falun and came upon Lecture 2, "The Issue of the Celestial Eye." There was a sentence, "when a master sees that your celestial eye has opened, he will transform one for you, which can also count as a result of your own cultivation." I had read this passage countless times and was even able to recite it, but it was different on that day. I was struck from head to toe, and I read it again - "which can also count as a result of your own cultivation." At that moment I suddenly realized that Master had always been giving me silent hints, yet all of them had been counted as if I had done them. I had often taken what our benevolent Master and Dafa have given me -wisdom, abilities, and everything else that I'm not aware of - as my own accomplishments. I cried in shame. As a Fa-rectification period Dafa disciple, whatever Master expects me to do had been arranged so long ago, that is why all the abilities I do have and should have are a result of Heaven's will, in other words, Master's will. If I have any abilities, they have been given to me by the heavens - by Master. As a Fa-rectification period Dafa disciple I need to clear-headedly recognize and handle well my relationship with Master and with Dafa.
I used to think that my abilities had already been utilized to the fullest. How could I possibly do even better? That was a human notion, human logic, which was not wrong, but now I feel that Dafa has given me boundless wisdom, that I can never use up my abilities, and that as each day goes by they will be stronger and stronger and I will be better and better, because I am a Fa-rectification period Dafa disciple. As long as I diligently make progress in the Fa, follow the path that Master has daily arranged for me and continually raise my cultivation level, then my wisdom will continuously increase and my abilities will become stronger and stronger. My personal experiences have proven that this is truly how it is.
Send Forth Righteous Thoughts; by Staying Unaffected, We can Handle All Situations
When I first began to send forth righteous thoughts, my facial expression was as if I was fighting someone with my life. A fellow practitioner said, "Look at you, with your cheeks puffing out, you're really exerting a lot of effort, aren't you!" I thought that eliminating the evil required an all-out effort. Another practitioner said to me, "You should be merciful when you send forth righteous thoughts." I argued, "Why have any mercy for the evil?" Later on through studying the Fa, especially after reading Touring North America to Teach the Fa (2002) several times I saw more and more clearly the wickedness of the evil demons in other dimensions who are causing damage to Dafa. If the cosmos were to be renewed according to their wicked standards, then the re-created cosmos would still be unrighteous and be filled with selfishness. What would be the point of re-creating the cosmos? Then I thought of the changes I had gone through after I took up cultivation. If Falun Dafa were not taught to the public on a large scale, I would have become degenerate, along with the degenerate human society, and the most frightening part was that I didn't realize it at all!
For the past three years, the evil old forces, with the excuse of "testing," instigated the evil beings at low-level dimensions to brutally persecute Dafa disciples, as I understood from Master's words, interfering with Master's Fa-rectification and obstructing sentient beings from obtaining the Fa. All of their means, which are the most despicable, have proven that they are evil, and that their future can only be destruction! I have realized that the more clearly I see from the Fa the nature of the evil, the more I recognize the importance of sending forth righteous thoughts. The more peaceful and tranquil my mind is when I send forth righteous thoughts, the more powerful they are. At such times, a grand feeling of mercy would envelop me, and this mercy makes me cry.
It's extremely important to clear one's thoughts before sending forth righteous thoughts. Sometimes I would be in the middle of doing Dafa work, and the alarm would remind me that it was time to send forth righteous thoughts. Even though I had my legs double crossed, I was worrying about whether my train of thought would be interrupted, and whether I could continue on the same train of thought after sending forth righteous thoughts. When I tried to resolve this problem, I remembered what Master said in "Expounding on the Fa," "Your enlightened, original nature will automatically know what to do." When I clear my own thoughts, I'm in fact cleaning up the dust that has gathered on my original nature. When the dust becomes less and less, then my original nature will be more and more revealed. Those five minutes used for clearing my own thoughts do not interfere with my doing Dafa work. Instead, it guarantees that I will do it better.
The more pressing the work is, the more important it is to calm our minds to send forth righteous thoughts. This is precisely a test to determine whether I am a cultivator or an everyday person. Several times I felt that time was too pressing and I could just send forth righteous thoughts after completing the work, and that if I send forth righteous thoughts once an hour it would delay the work. In reality, the situation is the opposite of what I thought. The purpose of clarifying the truth is to enable people to see through the evil's deceit, while sending forth righteous thoughts is eliminating the evil. When the evil factors behind are eliminated, it would be easier to save all sentient beings. When I understood this principle clearly, I no longer regarded sending forth righteous thoughts as a task that had to be completed. The purpose for Fa-rectification period Dafa disciples to seek out Master is not just to return to their own origins, but also to assist Master in Fa-rectification.
When the part of me that has completed cultivation is separated from the rest of me, I have to cultivate anew from this human side. At this point my state is not as good as the time immediately before the separation, so it is even more important to study the Fa well during that time. During those times, the state I was in while sending forth righteous thoughts was a bit poorer. I would suddenly start thinking about other Dafa work or other things related to Dafa. I would immediately correct this way of thinking, telling myself, "Let me first eliminate the evil that distracts me." On the surface I didn't think of anything bad, since after all I was thinking about Dafa work. But it's still unacceptable. Why not? Well, what should I be doing at that time? To send forth righteous thoughts! Yet what was I thinking about? It was things that had nothing to do with sending forth righteous thoughts. In other words, I was not eliminating the evil at that time, so isn't this a serious matter? This is precisely how the evil is cunning, as they are using seemingly righteous thoughts to interfere with my eliminating them. So during that time, any thoughts that arise and have nothing to do with sending forth righteous thoughts are a form of interference, something to be eliminated without hesitation!
Master has given us the formulas and the ability to eliminate the evil. This is an extraordinary mission and an honor that Master has bestowed upon Fa-rectification Dafa disciples and is precious beyond description. That is why I want to tell you to remind ourselves again of Master's teaching, "You need to be worthy of the title 'Fa-rectification period Dafa disciple'! That's something that the cosmos won't have again. This only happens once since the beginning of time - it only happens once since the beginning of time in the cosmos." ["Teaching the Fa at the 2002 Fa Conference in Boston"]
Master, I will do my best to walk a righteous path and be a true Fa-rectification period Dafa disciple.
Thank you Master! Thank you everyone! Please kindly correct anything that is inappropriate.
