Manifestations of Being Attached to the Pursuit of Comfort
(Clearwisdom.net) I have seen two obvious manifestations of the attachment to the pursuit of comfort. One is avoiding conflicts and being unwilling to look inside myself, feeling too "lazy" to use my brain, resulting in failure to clarify the truth thoroughly. The second is to excessively depend on Master Li.
The first manifestation is particularly obvious in the conflict between myself and my husband. When my husband and I were still dating, I asked him to read the Nine Commentaries on the Communist Party. It could be said that it was because he agreed to read them and withdraw from the CCP that I was willing to marry him and live with him until today. Now, I realize it was my human attachments, because I felt that I could be free from worry if I got married to a man who has withdrawn from the evil party. Of course, from another angle, by doing so I wanted to create a good environment for myself, but I didn't have a clear understanding within the Fa that my own responsibility is more important.
After we got married, my husband totally changed and he not only interfered with my sending forth righteous thoughts and clarifying the truth, but he also said many disrespectful words against Dafa. Today, I clearly realize that this happened because I had this attachment to the pursuit of comfort by avoiding conflicts. I didn't take this opportunity to clarify the truth to him and completely clean up the evil. On the other hand, I didn't show the righteous aspects of Dafa practitioners in my daily behavior and I thought it was fine as long as he withdrew from the CCP. But even if an everyday person quits the CCP, his/her life could still be in danger if he has disrespectful thoughts toward Dafa in mind.
Actually, my husband should have had a predestined relationship with Master Li because he read "China Falun Gong" in 1997, but due to the loss of his true nature, he didn't obtain Dafa. I ignored the opportunity for him to obtain Dafa, and I only limited myself to persuading him to withdraw from the CCP and its related organizations. I had the attachment of the pursuit of comfort and thus I was unwilling to have conflicts with him, as it would interfere with my Fa-study and practice. I decided to remove this attachment and clarify the truth to him in depth. I could not just care about my own reading of Dafa books and Fa-study, I should also pay more attention to being responsible for the salvation of everyday people.
Another manifestation of my attachments to the pursuit of comfort is depending excessively on Master Li. During the previous period of time, because I could maintain righteous thoughts, Master would always compassionately wake me up to send forth righteous thoughts without any alarm. Thus, I would not interfere with everyday people's sleep, and I also did the things that Dafa disciples should do.
But recently, I was too busy with human matters, I didn't spend enough time on Fa-study and righteous thoughts, and my state of mind was not stable. I could only wake up by an alarm, which not only affected everyday people's rest, but also gave me the illusion of Master waking me up. How can I ask Master to use the sacred powers of Dafa to reinforce my bad thoughts? It is just like what Master said,
"If you don't search inward when certain problems and conflicts surface, they will intensify, and it happens because of your own attachments. Some become more and more intense, and they're in fact caused by the person's not having cultivated well. It continues until [the conflict] can't be resolved and that person is confused and bothered by the state he finds himself in. What's to be done, then? [They decide,] "Let's go find Master." Every time things get out of hand, people go looking for Master. It's always because they can't overcome it, or don't want to overcome it, that they go looking for Master. Is it that you're trying to help Master cultivate?" ("Teaching the Fa at the Fa Conference at the U.S. Capital")
The above understanding is restricted by my enlightenment at my current cultivation level. If there is any limitation, I hope my fellow practitioners will kindly point it out to me.