Eliminating the Notion “This Is Just the Way I Am”

(Minghui.org) I was combing my hair one day when my fingers felt the rough hair at the back of my head. Master had given me a hint before that my rough and twisted hair was related to my impetuousness, irritability, and impatient nature. The roughness of my hair seemed to tell me that I did not align with the Fa. I thought it was time to correct myself.

However, a strong and well-hidden feeling flashed through my mind: “My hair was like this when I was born and has always been this way. It will never change!”

I then realized that thought wasn’t from my original self, and I could clearly see that hidden notion: “This is just the way I am.” It had been buried deep in my mind and had made me believe it was my true self. This notion had made me think I absolutely could never change. It also put me in a pessimistic and helpless mindset, believing I had choice but to accept it. Whenever I wanted to eliminate something bad, especially the long-term habits developed after birth and before I started to cultivate, the first thought that came to my mind was that this was indisputable, and it even made me ignore reality. As a result, it has taken me a long time to distinguish the false “me” and to get rid of some attachments.

“This is just the way I am” is actually a degenerated notion acquired from living under the influence of the Chinese Communist Party (CCP). When I was labeled as being a certain way, I was forced to admit it to protect myself in the CCP-distorted climate. After a long time, these things eventually embedded themselves into my mind and formed a false and stubborn “me.” They were rooted in the Party culture of adherence to one’s ego and had been forced on me by the old forces, aiming to keep me from assimilating to the Fa and from returning to my true self.

I can see how shameless and ridiculous these degenerated things are when measured against the Fa. They are absolutely not my true self, because my life originated from the Fa and was assimilated to Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance. The notion “This is just the way I am” is exactly what I need to eliminate by cultivating myself!

I had trouble identifying the deeply-rooted notion of “this is just the way I am” in the past. I recently thought there was something wrong and slowly felt its existence. However, I wasn’t powerful enough to seize it. I can now clearly distinguish it from my true self and truly feel the notion has become weaker. As a matter of fact, Master must have reinforced me and helped me reduce it. I strongly believe the degenerated notion will be completely eliminated as I make progress in my cultivation.

Thank you, Master!