Waking Up by Looking Inward During a Tribulation

(Minghui.org) I have been practicing Dafa for over 26 years. Before I obtained the Fa when I was in my 40s, I was physically and mentally weak, as if I were an old lady. I suffered from more than a dozen diseases, and was struggling hard in life. Dafa renewed my life. Although I am considered old-age now, I have become as if I were a young person, thanks to Dafa, as I have undergone a radical change. Since 1999 when the persecution started, I have remained firmly on the path of cultivation.

After retirement, one day in February 2020, as I stood up after lunch, I suddenly felt that one side of my body had become numb. I wanted to go back to the bedroom and lie down for a while. At this time, a passage appeared in my mind: “In this case, don’t go in and lie down; wake up your family quickly.” I thought this passage was from my phone, and I still wanted to go to my bedroom, but I couldn’t walk into the bedroom. This passage reappeared, so I went to another bedroom and woke up my husband. He helped me walk around, and then we walked to the study. I saw Master’s portrait and shouted: “Master! The evil wants to persecute me again!” Then I lost consciousness.

I heard a noise one day, and asked, “Why is it so noisy?” My daughter was happy to see me waking up and told me that I was in the hospital. I had a cerebral hemorrhage, which was very dangerous, and I was in a coma for several days. Only then did I remember that Master stopped me twice from going to the bedroom to lie down; otherwise, I would have bled a lot! Because I still had no feeling in the left half of my body, I was sent to a rehabilitation center for physical therapy. I returned home after I could walk. Later, I found that my eyes were blurry.

I thought deeply, but still didn’t know why this happened. A practitioner said that I was taken advantage of by the old forces due to omissions on my part.

After I returned home, I systematically studied Master’s lectures based on their chronology.

Master said:

“It is thus primarily students who haven’t been very diligent, who don’t study the Fa frequently, or whose minds are elsewhere while studying the Fa who have been interfered with the most and persecuted the worst. That’s always the case. The Dafa disciples who have cultivated well, however, truly cannot be interfered with—not even in the least. Moreover, their righteous thoughts are strong, and they are helping others at the same time. They are truly helping Master rectify the Fa.” (“Fa Teaching Given at the 2010 New York Fa Conference” in Collected Teachings Given Around the World, Vol. XI)

I was like the first kind of person Master talked about. I was not focused when studying the Fa and sending righteous thoughts, and I didn’t pay attention to saving people. After being persecuted, my fear increased. I held hatred while clarifying the truth to the Chinese Communist Party (CCP) members. On the surface, I was doing all the three things, but just as a formality to complete the task. Although I didn’t go to sleep before midnight and I did the morning exercises on time, I would browse on my cell phone or watch TV with my husband.

After retirement, I moved away from the area where my Fa study group was located. However, other practitioners in the Fa study group did not forget me. After my tribulations occurred, they sent me mp3 audio players and memory cards with recordings of the Nine Commentaries on the Communist Party, Disintegration of Party Culture, Discussing Party Culture, The Ultimate Goal of Communism, and The Devil Is Ruling Our World. They asked me to listen to them repeatedly, as well as the Minghui website’s series of articles titled Eliminating Party Culture. The more I listened, the more I understood. It was like a sharp sword cutting through my layers of disguise, taking off what seemed like a gorgeous coat, and I saw a hidden me.

I was quite surprised by this realization, and I looked further inward. I first found that I had failed to cultivate the kindness and compassion that a cultivator should develop. I fought against different opinions and voices, and treated them as interference, instead of looking inward. When I went to deal with it, I didn’t regard it as a good opportunity to cultivate myself, and just kept doing the same thing over and over again. This is a typical manifestation of indoctrination by the CCP. However, Dafa practitioners, given the guidance of Master’s principles, should save ordinary people, and definitely should not fight like them.

When I continued to dig deeper, I saw that after retirement, I wanted to unload my burdens, and I began to travel and shop at home and abroad with my husband. I focused on pursuing materialistic enjoyment, and did not cultivate myself!

Master purified my body for more than 20 years, but I did not truly cultivate myself. I was taken advantage of by the old forces, who persecuted me. Master cherishes every Dafa practitioner, and Master brought me back from the brink of death, and gave me another opportunity to cultivate and do well. I was certain that I would catch up and rectify myself!

Master said:

“Each person’s situation is unique. But I would like you to know one thing: now that you have Dafa with you, you have gained the Fa, and your life belongs to the Great Way, so you should forge ahead without any doubt, with righteous thoughts and actions, and do things as I have taught you.” (“2018 Fa Teaching Given in Washington, D.C.”)

I came to realize that my life belongs to Dafa, and I must follow Master’s arrangements in everything I do. I can no longer be polluted by modern medicine, modern science, and modern concepts. I therefore increased my efforts to study and recite the Fa, memorizing and then reciting Zhuan Falun, Hong Yin, and the new lectures. I also looked inward, dug deep into the toxins facing the indoctrination by the CCP, and finally understood the importance of the Nine Commentaries and other articles. I also made multiple MP3 audio files for other practitioners, relatives, friends, and acquaintances, hoping to help them eliminate the CCP toxins.

From now on, I will further purify myself and become a true Dafa cultivator.