Eliminating My Attachment to Fear

(Minghui.org) David died in late summer, 2023. When I was asked to go to his home and retrieve his Falun Dafa books I learned what happened to him.

After the Chinese Communist Party (CCP) started persecuting Falun Dafa in July 1999, David’s wife was deceived by the propaganda and tried to force him to stop practicing by threatening to divorce him if he didn’t. He refused. She was pregnant with their son. She left in a rage and took their daughter with her. She eventually remarried.

Many years passed, his children grew up, but they had no contact their father. David lived alone. When he developed illness symptoms his ex-wife sent their son to care for him.

After David passed, I was reluctant to go to his place and get his books. I’d been detained twice, and I’m on the CCP’s “wanted list.” I didn’t know what I’d encounter at his home. I worried that his ex-wife might report me to the police.

I reminded myself that I’m a practitioner, and fear is an attachment that I should eliminate. It’s important that his ex-wife not destroy the Dafa books, as this would bring her a lot of karma.

Despite my concerns, another practitioner and I went to David’s home. As soon as I greeted his ex-wife, she said, “David died because he practiced Falun Dafa.” I said, “That’s not true. Falun Dafa teaches us to be good people by following the principles of Truthfulness, Compassion, and Forbearance.” She said angrily, “Stop! Or please leave.”

I tried to calm her down by saying, “We just came to retrieve David’s Falun Dafa books. Would you please help us find them? If you want to read them, you can keep them, otherwise, please give them to us.” She said, “He liked those books, so I burned them all.”

The practitioner who came with me knew that David kept his books in a box. He pointed to a box and said, “Are there any books in that box?” She replied without thinking, “There is food in it.” But when she opened it, it contained two Dafa books. She handed them to us.

As we were leaving, we saw a painting of a Dafa boat beside the door. The ex-wife told us to take it. I said that I would get someone to fetch it later. She said, “Then you’ll have to pay for it.” I said, “But David was given it for free by a fellow practitioner.” She said, “I don’t care.”

When a practitioner went there to get the painting, the ex-wife asked for 1,000 yuan (about $139). The practitioner left because he didn’t have that much money with him. We tried to get the painting another time but failed again.

I felt bad that I hadn’t taken it when I had the chance; so I went to David’s home by myself. The painting was no longer next to the door, instead there was a rectangular mirror. I didn’t give it much thought and left.

After I got home, I remembered David had a mirror that had pictures of Master on it. I thought it must be that mirror. I worried that if the ex-wife destroyed the pictures, she would create huge karma for herself. I couldn’t let that happen.

Remembering to Have Compassion for Others

I went to David’s home again. This time I put myself in her shoes and said, “I just came here to see you. I wanted to tell you that I admire you.”

She asked, “Admire me for what?”

I said, “You worked hard to raise your children. When David was sick, you sent your son to take care of him. You are a kind person.” She was happy to hear this.

I continued, “Because you are such a good person, I don’t want to see you destroy any Dafa books because I believe it won’t do you any good. If, by any chance, you find more of David’s books, please give them to me, and you will be blessed.” She said she hadn’t found any, so I left.

As we walked to the door, she pointed to the mirror and said, “Please take it with you.” I turned it over, and saw the three pictures of Master Li. It was exactly what I was looking for. I said I would pay her for the mirror, but she said there was no need.

A few days later, I met her in the market. She said, “I found more books. You can come and get them.” I went to her home that afternoon. But this time, she asked for money. I paid her 300 yuan (about $42), the original cost of the books.

I told her, “Actually we all have Dafa books. I came here for you. I worried that you might destroy these books because of your misunderstandings about Dafa. That would not be good for you. I hope you will be blessed. We might not have the chance to see each other in the future, I sincerely hope you can quit any CCP organizations you joined, and thus have a good future.” She felt my sincerity and agreed to quit the Young Pioneers using an alias.

I also helped her son quit a CCP organization. I told her son and her current husband to remember: Falun Dafa is good, Truthfulness, Compassion, and Forbearance are good. I wished the family happiness and peace.

Looking back at everything that happened when I went to retrieve the books, I realized it was a cultivation opportunity. Due to my past experiences, my heart always beat faster when I heard a police siren. When I was told to retrieve David’s books, I was afraid that I’d be reported to the police and arrested.

Then, I remembered what was most important: preventing ordinary people from creating karma.

When I thought about others but not myself, the attachment of fear was eliminated. The next time the police came to my home to harass me I did not hide—instead I faced them calmly.