Resuming Cultivation: Diligently Studying the Fa
(Minghui.org) I was very little when I started Falun Dafa cultivation practice, also called Falun Gong. There were about a dozen practitioners in my area at the time. But according to my mother, only my sister and I still practice Dafa.
Witnessing the Power of Dafa
A landline phone was installed in our home when I was about ten years old. Out of curiosity, I always wanted to play with it.
I entered my parents' bedroom and saw a painting hanging on the wall, with a Falun badge attached to the painting. While I was playing with the phone, I looked up and saw the Falun badge spinning and glowing.
I was shocked, and ran downstairs to tell my mother about it. She said to me with a smile, “You have good inborn quality. Master must be taking care of you.”
That moment has been deeply ingrained in my mind.
My mother started practicing Falun Dafa in 1996. I listened to Master Li Hongzhi's (the founder) audio Fa teachings, and watched the video lectures with her. I didn't fully understand some of the content, but I accepted what Master said.
My right ear was bleeding one day. My family was terrified and wanted to take me to the hospital. But I was firm, and refused to go. I recited Master's Fa every day,
“When it’s difficult to endure, you can endure it. When it’s impossible to do, you can do it.” (Lecture Nine, Zhuan Falun)
I firmly believed that Master was purifying my body. About a month later, a chunk of bloody flesh fell out of my ear, which was about the size of a thumb nail. When I touched my ear, it no longer hurt. It was fine!
Persecution of My Mother
Jiang Zemin, then head of the Chinese Communist Party (CCP), launched the persecution against Falun Gong on July 20, 1999. CCP propaganda viciously maligned and attacked Falun Gong, its Master, and practitioners. The sudden persecution shocked us.
Why was the practice that followed the principles of Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance being suppressed? Fellow practitioners felt extremely sad, and were certain that the persecution was unacceptable. They all wanted to go to Beijing to clarify the truth about Falun Gong to those in power.
At the age of 10, I joined them. However, the vehicle we were in was stopped by the police before we could even leave our city. My mother was arrested, our home was ransacked, and my mother's phone was monitored.
The police came to our home again one night in the winter of 2000. They ransacked the place and arrested my mother. I was terrified.
That night, my father sat silently on the bed without saying a word. I was so worried because I didn't know how my mother would be treated or when she would return.
With great help from other practitioners, my mother was soon released, but it didn't take long for the police to come banging on the door again. This time we refused to open it.
The management at my mother's workplace told her that she had to attend a training session out of town. She believed them and went there, but she was arrested and taken to a brainwashing center in Wuhan City, where she was held for over a month.
Mother was emaciated when she returned home and was reluctant to mention how she was treated. But she did say, “What the wicked CCP did there was simply a crime against humanity!”
My grandfather, also a Dafa practitioner, had his home ransacked. He was harassed and arrested many times. He later passed away due to sickness karma.
I held fear in my heart for many years because of the persecution. Every day I left for school I was afraid that my mother would not be home when I returned. I was worried that the police would come and ransack our home again. That kind of tremendous mental pressure accompanied me through my adolescence.
Contaminated by Society
Because I didn't study the Fa regularly, I got drawn into societal norms after I grew up. I couldn't control myself and acted like an everyday person on the issue of lust repeatedly. I also smoked, drank alcohol, and didn't treat myself as a practitioner.
My mother often reminded me of my wrongdoings, and told me some cultivation stories, attempting to help me get back on the path of cultivation. But I was deaf to her advice and thought that to be a member of society things could not be done easily if I didn't drink and smoke.
“The Buddha School does not permit drinking alcohol. Have you ever seen a Buddha carrying a wine container? No.” (Lecture Seven, Zhuan Falun)
Master's Fa has always been lingering in my ears, but temptations and pressure from society 'to fit in' was too much for me.
During my time at college, I was addicted to online games. I spent all my time playing games and often skipped class to play online.
When I returned home at the end of the semester, my mother told me to take a look in the mirror. I had long hair and I looked emaciated. I looked exactly like a drug addict, as seen on television.
I spent each day in a muddled way and didn't really feel at ease. I woke up a few times in the middle of the night and thought about Master and Dafa. I felt ashamed about having turned out like this and wondered if Master would still want me.
After repeated and serious thinking I decide to return to cultivation, to be a Dafa practitioner during the Fa-rectification period, and help Master rectify the Fa. I knew that I must take cultivation seriously! At that moment, my righteous side seemed to have awakened.
I said to Master in my heart, “Please forgive my ignorance. I still have faith in Master and Dafa, please give me a chance to correct myself. I will sincerely cherish it!” I silently confessed to Master and broke out in tears. I knew that Master had not given up on me.
Truly returning to cultivation was not a simple thing to do. When I picked up Zhuan Falun the long-formed bad thoughts that I had developed in ordinary society constantly interfered with my mind.
Although I hadn't studied the Fa a lot, I knew that I had to suppress everything that did not accord with the Fa's principles of Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance. With further Fa study my mind gradually became cleaner, and I could reject the bad thoughts easily. When they emerged, I just sent forth righteous thoughts to clear them away.
I found that attachments like competitiveness, lust, showing off, and jealousy could not be easily eliminated and would try to take over my mind when I was not alert.
My strongest attachment was to lust.
“There is yet another form of demonic interference that everyone, including each person in our school of practice, will encounter: It is the demon of lust.” (Lecture Six, Zhuan Falun)
I thought that beautiful girls and lust were essential to life. After studying Master's Fa about this issue carefully, I knew that I must take it seriously and get rid of my attachment to lust.
Effect of CCP Virus
The outbreak of the CCP virus (coronavirus) in Wuhan made the whole country nervous. Most provinces ordered the closure of cities, villages, communities, and some residential buildings.
I thought that I could take advantage of this time to study the Fa at home with a peaceful mind.
I studied Zhuan Falun and Master’s other teachings during the day, and did the exercises and sent forth righteous thoughts with my parents at night.
Despite the sudden closure of society, I still needed to tell people about Dafa. I thought of sending informational materials to local residents to tell them that reciting “Falun Dafa is good, Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance is good” sincerely will keep them safe.
I also decided to tell them about the CCP's persecution of Falun Dafa, such as harvesting organs from living Dafa practitioners, and I reminded them not to be blinded by the CCP's propaganda.
After exchanging thoughts with my mother, we printed materials about Dafa and delivered them to the homes of people who lived locally.
When I was working on producing the fliers and other Dafa materials there was a sense of being helped by the divine. I knew that Master was helping me to accomplish it.
The reason I wrote this article was to help young practitioners who had a similar experience to mine to awaken and return to Dafa cultivation. As soon as the opportunity of Fa-rectification passes it will be too late for regret.