Remaining Firm in My Faith Despite Torture and Tribulations
(Minghui.org) I am 64 years old and began to practice Falun Dafa more than 20 years ago. My childhood was not happy. My grandmother and my father beat and berated my mother. My mother was unable to bear it so my parents divorced.
My mother took me and my two sisters and remarried. Ever since I was little, I had to do a lot of chores, such as fetching water from the well, cooking, and babysitting my younger siblings.
I was mistreated by adults, and at school I was bullied by my classmates. As a teenager, I couldn’t stand this and I tried to commit suicide several times.
I suffered from various illnesses, and as I grew older I became resentful, rebellious, and incredibly rude. At home and at school, no one dared to provoke me.
I got married, which was a mistake because of my fighting mentality. My husband and I quarreled and fought all the time. I suffered from many illnesses, including neurasthenia, pleural effusion, hepatitis, severe heart disease, and pancreatitis. I was bedridden, couldn't take care of myself, and felt hopeless.
Never Forget the Day I Found Dafa
I will never forget the day I began practicing Falun Dafa – it was November 4, 1997. I had been in a state of utmost despair when a Falun Dafa practitioner gave me the book Zhuan Falun. When I held the book with both hands and looked at Master's photo, I felt that I knew Master, but couldn't remember where from.
The practitioner read the book to me. After listening for about 20 minutes, I got out of bed and was no longer bedridden.
After reading Zhuan Falun, I understood the meaning of life. I understood where people originated from and why they became sick. I learned that I should look inside when facing problems, and try to improve myself if I don’t do something well. I also learned to put others before myself and be selfless.
Dafa is amazing. I recovered from all my illnesses within two days of practicing. The black spots on my face disappeared, my skin turned a healthy color, and my bent back became straight. Many people heard about my improvements and came to my home to learn Falun Dafa.
Reading My Letter to the Police Head
On July 20, 1999, when the Chinese Communist Party (CCP) banned Falun Dafa, I went to the local square to practice the exercises in the morning as usual, but there were police cars and officers there. I was confused at first, and said to the police, “Falun Dafa is good.” The head of the police station said, “This is Jiang Zemin's order. We don’t care if you steal, rob, or plunder, but we do care if you practice Falun Dafa.”
That day I wrote a letter to the head of the police station and hand-delivered it. There were about 30 people in the station, with some local and regional police as well as some officials. I approached the police head and told him that I had written him a letter. I offered to read the letter aloud, so he took everyone to the conference room.
I sat at the conference room podium and read the letter. I told people the changes I experienced after I learned Falun Dafa, and that Dafa teaches people to be good. The people in the room urged me to continue reading when the police head had to answer a phone call. The police head hurried into the conference room and was grateful that I was waiting for him. He said, “Give her a cup of water.”
Praise and applause filled the room after I finished reading my letter. The police head also applauded and said, “Falun Dafa is good.” My letter was placed on his desk so that his visitors could read it.
Tortured in a Forced Labor Camp
Because I clarified the truth about Dafa, I was illegally taken to a detention center and detained. At that time, Jiang Zemin had just dictated his policy regarding Dafa practitioners: “Defame their reputation, destroy them financially, and eliminate them physically.” I suffered all kinds of torture because I refused to give up my belief.
On one of the coldest evenings in the winter of 2000, the head of the detention center forced ten practitioners to crawl like dogs in the snowy yard after he discovered that we were doing the Falun Dafa exercises. Four inmates, shaking and shivering in heavy coats, took turns watching us crawl in the snow. We were not allowed to wear shoes or heavy coats. I was wearing only a thin shirt and pants, and no shoes. All my fingers and toes were frozen.
My nails cracked shortly after returning to the cell. Three days later, the skin on my fingers peeled and fell off, and my nails fell off one by one. I was later taken to a hospital for medical treatment. My fingers without skin were dripping with yellow liquid. My visiting mother held my hands and cried, “Why are they so cruel? What crime did you commit to deserve this?”
I did the Falun Dafa exercises and read the Fa, and without any medicine I recovered and my fingers returned to normal.
Less than ten days after I was taken to the hospital, the Chinese Communist Party (CCP) broadcast a video of the “Self-immolation in Tiananment Square” incident that was planned to turn the Chinese people against Falun Dafa. I went through unbearable pain to write a letter about how I suspected it was all staged, and sent it to the head of the police station. He asked me to attend a meeting with a dozen practitioners in the police department conference room.
I saw practitioners who were brought in from labor camps when I arrived in the conference room. They had been forced to give up Dafa after undergoing great pressure and torture. They were helping the CCP brainwash practitioners like me who refused to give up their beliefs.
Also in the conference room was the head of the Political and Legal Affairs Committee, the director, the deputy mayor, and heads of police stations from different areas. The practitioners who had been forced to give up Dafa gave speeches first. I felt that they dared not speak the truth, and had given in because they could not bear the persecution.
After their speeches, I read aloud the article I wrote to point out the discrepancies about the self-immolation incident, and urged the police officers to think about it using professional ethics and conscience. I told them that the persecution of Falun Dafa was a major crime committed by Jiang Zemin. When I was almost finished reading, a few people tried to grab my paper. I blocked them and said, “Don’t grab it, I will give it to you after I finish reading.”
I was sentenced to a labor camp for two years because of my speech. My mother came to see me with my 12-year-old son before I left for the labor camp. She cried and said, “Don’t worry, two years is short. You would have died long ago if you hadn’t learned Falun Dafa. Dafa saved you! Don't worry about anything at home. Remember, as long as I can breathe, I will wait for you.” I shed tears, and thanked her for understanding and encouraging me.
The guards in the labor camp increased my detention time because I refused to give up my faith. I told the officers that what they did was not important, as my Master would decide what happens.
A team head told me one day that the camp director and the division leaders had a meeting to discuss my term. He said, “It was said that the additional time for you will not be counted. The director and the division heads said that you always gave them trouble, and that it’s too annoying to have you here. So they want to let you go as soon as possible.” I was released without having to serve any additional time.
Last Practitioner to Leave the Forced Labor System
I was wanted nationwide for more than seven years before I was returned to the labor camp for the second time. I didn’t leave for other cities because I firmly believed in Master and Dafa. I was almost caught nine times by the police during those seven years, but every time those who came to arrest me left after listening to the truth about Dafa. By the time they remembered that their task was to arrest me, I had escaped.
I was arrested once while on my way home, and taken to the labor camp again. I was locked up in a storage room and had to sleep on the floor. As soon as the division head entered the room, he said, “Why are you here again? It’s so annoying to know that you are here again, it bothers me. I really don’t want to accept you. This time, you should behave well and I will let you go earlier.”
They deprived me of sleep. They woke me at four o'clock every morning and made me stand until 2:00 a.m. The cell was damp and cold. There was no heat, no sunshine, and it was too cold to sleep.
I only got one steamed bun for each meal, and was not allowed to drink water. They deprived me of using the toilet. Three inmates took turns monitoring me around the clock. They followed me to the bathroom, and dragged me away after I urinated, before I was able to have a bowel movement, for more than two weks. They also didn’t allow me to wash my face or brush my teeth.
I was locked up in a solitary confinement cell for a year. The people I saw during that year were the camp director, division heads, three inmates, and some practitioners who renounced Falun Dafa, and were trying to persuade me to do the same.
The leaders of the labor camp took turns talking to me, but they did not mention Dafa. I told them that Falun Dafa is good, Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance is good. Some of them told me secretly, “Do not be too stubborn, or you will regret it.”
Being Injected With Unknown Drugs
Some unknown drugs were put into my meals, and I was injected with drugs after they realized that no one could make me give up Falun Dafa. Two months before I was released from the labor camp, I became extremely weak, unable to speak, and had a stench in my nose and mouth. I felt nauseated, but couldn’t spit out anything. My hearing and vision deteriorated, and my memory diminished. I couldn’t even remember the poems I had been reciting every day.
My black hair turned gray. My fair, tender skin turned to wrinkles, and my rosy complexion turned to purple yellow. I became emaciated and my nails withered. I felt that my throat was blocked by something but I couldn’t spit it out or swallow it down. I got a terrible headache, my nose was bleeding, and I couldn't sleep.
I got a terrible stomachache and could barely eat anything. My legs were shaking and I convulsed. I felt immense fear in my heart. I forced myself to recite the poems and recent lectures by Master. I asked Master to help me when I couldn’t remember anything. With Master’s protection, I kept reciting the Fa, so I could suppress some of these incorrect states. I firmly believed in Master and the Fa, and thought I would recover soon.
After the forced labor camp system was abolished, I was the last Falun Dafa practitioner to leave the camp. I had been detained for two years.
Expelling the Poison
After I returned home, I couldn't eat, drink, or sleep well, and I lost some of my memory. I read the Fa and did the exercises. My body was covered in dark red bumps, which were painful and itchy.
When I was riding an electric bike one day, due to my poor memory I forgot how to brake. I fell into a one meter deep ditch with stone banks. My eyebrows hit the edge of the stones. I shouted, “Master!” then passed out. When I woke up, the wounds on my eyebrows were still bleeding a lot. I thought to myself, “My blood is the most precious and can't flow like this anymore.” Then the bleeding stopped, but I couldn’t move. After about half an hour, three people came and moved me out of the ditch. Passersby wanted to call an ambulance but I stopped them.
My husband came and took me home. My body was swollen, and I couldn’t move any parts of my body except for my mouth and eyes. Practitioners came to my home to study the Fa with me after they learned what had happened, and I continued to listen to Master's lectures after they left. I didn't spend a penny on medical treatment.
I was able to sit up after 18 days. I was able to get out of bed on day 19, and walk on day 20. Gradually I could move my fingers again, and the two wounds on my eyebrows did not show scars.
Nine relatives came to see me and advised me to go to the hospital. I told them not to worry, and that I would be fine after I read the Fa and did the exercises. They told my friends that I would be in a vegetative state for the rest of my life. In less than a month they saw that I was doing well.
One day my son said, “Mom, the blood you shed that day was so much that everyone who saw it thought that you would die.” Although I shed so much blood, I didn’t feel that I was short of blood. I realized that the blood that flowed out contained the drugs they injected. Master had arranged for the accident to remove the poison from my body.
I know that all of the tribulations and difficulties I encountered were the result of karma I had created over many lifetimes. I know that without Master’s help, I couldn't pay back those debts. Master saved me again and again from danger and difficulties.