Overcoming My Fear of Clarifying the Truth to Chinese People
(Minghui.org) Greetings, Master and fellow practitioners:
I was born in China in 1999 and raised by my grandmother, who is a Falun Dafa practitioner, I could say “Falun Dafa is good” when I started to talk. My grandmother taught me to recite poems from Hong Yin before I went to school.
After I started school, I had more and more homework, so I didn’t study the Fa as regularly as before. I only studied Zhuan Falun with my mother during summer and winter holidays. However, Master Li was always looking after me. Whenever I had conflicts with classmates or needed to eliminate attachments, Master’s Fa appeared in my mind. This helped me to follow the Dafa standards and to adjust my mindset.
The police arrested my grandmother when I was young. I hid behind my grandfather and didn’t dare look at them. That event cast a big shadow on my mind. After that, I would send forth righteous thoughts whenever I saw police vehicles or when I heard police sirens, because I worried that local practitioners might be arrested. As I grew up, because of the intense psychological pressure and fear, my mother and I didn’t go out to clarify the truth about Dafa. We usually hung truth-clarification fliers on doorknobs or pasted stickers with information about Dafa in the neighboring communities during the night. But we did tell our relatives and friends about Dafa.
My mother was arrested in 2016, because she filed a criminal complaint against Jiang Zemin, using her real name. I didn’t know what had happened until I returned home after school. I couldn’t stop crying when I heard she’d been taken away. I told my mother over the phone that I would ask the police to release her. How could the police arrest Falun Gong practitioners, people who follow the principles of Truthfulness, Compassion and Forbearance? But for safety reasons, my mother told me not to go. My mother returned home at one a.m.
The community officers kept calling my mother from that time on. She was threatened, and they ordered her to renounce Falun Gong. One of my father’s friends, who works at a police station, told us that, because of my mother’s record, my application to universities might be impacted during the “political review” process.
I moved to Toronto in September 2016, a year before the university entrance exam. I met up with fellow practitioners three days after I arrived and was so excited to see fellow practitioners. It was as if I was seeing family members I hadn’t seen for a long time. I cried as I hugged them. I joined the Toronto Youth Practitioners Club in 2017. This group provides good opportunities for clarifying the truth. We held many activities to tell people about Dafa and the persecution, which helped me eliminate the attachment of fear.
Telling Westerners about Dafa
Before leaving China, I had done very little to clarify the truth, so I hadn’t run into many embarrassing situations. But after I came to Canada, I had to talk to Westerners. I am introverted and my English skills aren’t so good, so I just distributed fliers at that time. Unless people asked what this was all about, I didn’t say anything. If they did ask, I was very confused. Usually I had to ask for help from other practitioners.
After some embarrassing situations, I realized that I shouldn’t be bothering other practitioners all the time. I went home and started to memorize and recite the sentences from the English truth-clarification flier. I would write down the frequently asked questions (using the translation app to translate) and memorize them. That helped when it came to talking to people and telling them about the persecution of Falun Dafa.
After some practice, my ability to talk to Westerners improved. Many would say “Thank you, dear,” after they heard the facts about Dafa. That made me very happy, because I knew that they said this because they were happy to hear the truth. After a lot of experiences like this, I became more and more willing to clarify the truth to Westerners. Their minds are pure since they haven’t been indoctrinated by the Chinese Communist Party (CCP). This became a big attachment for me, because I didn’t clarify the truth to Chinese people anymore.
“Counted among the feelings and emotions that people have are anger and happiness, love and hate, enjoyment as well as dislike, admiration and disdain, along with fondness and aversion. Ordinary people just live for feelings and emotions. Then, as practitioners who aspire to spiritual greatness, we mustn’t let feelings or emotions influence how we see things. We have to break free of them.” (The Sixth Talk, Zhuan Falun)
Making a Breakthrough to Clarify the Truth to Chinese
My attachment of fear didn’t disappear after I came to Canada. It was mostly due to my fear of being criticized by Chinese people. At many of the Youth Group’s activities, I mainly focused on Westerners and would take Chinese people to other practitioners. I only sent righteous thoughts to help. I was not able to make a breakthrough in clarifying the truth to the Chinese.
During a Falun Dafa Day parade, I walked through Chinatown with another young practitioner and saw a group of Chinese tourists waiting for their tour bus. Without hesitating, this practitioner began to clarify the truth to them. I was a bit afraid at the beginning, but I later felt sorry for them because I thought that they did not understand the truth yet.
I began to talk to them about the corruption of the CCP and the persecution in China. More and more of them came to listen. “Please come. Please all come to listen to the truth,” I said in my mind. However, things did not go as I anticipated. What I feared happened. They began to criticize us. I could feel that they were greatly poisoned by the CCP, but I was able to calm down. The willingness to help them understand the truth overcame my fear. In the end, however, we had to stop.
After this, the attachment of fear that I had almost relinquished came back. The three of us, including the practitioner who clarified the truth with me, shared our experience that evening. My mother said that nothing is a coincidence, that there must be something that I needed to improve upon. I began to look inside to see if my attachments had prevented these Chinese people from listening to the truth. After reflecting on it, I realized that I was attached to my reputation and feared criticism.
I learned from sharing with other practitioners that we can’t have any attachments when we explain the truth to Chinese people. Being eager to have them quit the CCP is also an attachment. Our minds should be calm when we clarify the truth. Everything that practitioners say has the energy of the Fa. Even if we don’t clarify the truth to them, we should at least leave them with the impression that cultivators are peaceful. Maybe they will understand the truth the next time when they meet other practitioners.
I read a report on the Minghui website about two Chinese international students who heard the truth about Dafa twice, but they didn’t quit the CCP. They listened carefully to practitioners the third time and decided to quit. “I’ve met lots of practitioners before. Why didn’t I quit CCP then?” one of them wondered aloud.
I learned that what we say can eliminate a layer of the barrier in a person’s mind. When another practitioner clarifies the truth to that person, that barrier gets thinner and thinner until the person finally understands the truth and quits the CCP. Therefore, when clarifying the truth, we should not have any attachments. Everything is according to Master’s arrangement.
Finding Opportunities to Tell People the Facts
I worked in a Chinese restaurant when I went to university. When I first started working, the restaurant owner’s daughter asked me if I had any beliefs. I said that I was a Falun Dafa practitioner and told them how great the practice is and about the 200 million-year-old stone in China that says: “The Communist Party Collapses.” They said they were not interested, so I didn’t mention it again.
The hostess said to me one day out of the blue, “I’d like to hear more about Falun Dafa. Please tell me.” I was shocked by her request, because it had been a long time since I had mentioned Dafa to her. I thanked Master for giving me this opportunity to clarify the truth to her.
I told her how my family had suffered because we practice Dafa. I also told her about the atrocities committed by the CCP, such as the organ harvesting from living Falun Gong practitioners. That shocked her.
“I don’t know much about what you just told me,” she said. “To think that is really happening in China. I used to read The Epoch Times newspaper and read about organ harvesting from living practitioners. I didn’t know that it really happens. It’s unbelievable.”
When I was clarifying the truth to the hostess, a server my age was standing nearby, listening. Most of the employees in the restaurant knew that I was a Dafa practitioner and had asked me about Dafa and the persecution on and off. I knew that the field was opening with Master’s help. Every time I talked about quitting the CCP, they just ignored it. They didn’t agree or disagree to quit. Then, I quit my job because of my studies. It’s a pity that I didn’t have the time to help them quit the CCP, but I will definitely ask them to quit the CCP if I have the opportunity in the future.
Eliminating Attachments During Truth-clarification
If time permitted, I helped to clarify the truth during parades with another young practitioner. That practitioner is outgoing and can talk to strangers easily, so we had an unspoken agreement: I’d mainly clarify the truth to Westerners while she mainly clarified the truth to Chinese.
I then thought that this was somehow wrong and mentioned this to other practitioners. They suggested that it was interference from some kind of bad substance. I had to overcome this substance in order to clarify the truth to Chinese people. I decided that I needed to make a breakthrough. The next time there was a parade, I told myself I had to clarify the truth to Chinese people.
At the next parade, I decided to talk to Chinese people about Dafa. Right before the parade, I saw a girl my age watching the parade. I sent forth righteous thoughts for a long time and asked for Master’s support. When I finally approached her, I found out that she was a local young practitioner. I told her the process of my thinking. She encouraged me not to hold any fear and that she would support me.
But, until almost at the end of the parade, there were no other Chinese people. I was about to give up when I saw a Chinese mother and her daughter. Now I knew that it was all Master’s arrangement. Another young practitioner was there to clarify the truth with me, and we complemented each other. At the same time, I also sent forth righteous thoughts asking for Master’s help. Fortunately, this mother and daughter were not seriously poisoned by the CCP. They supported Dafa practitioners and appreciated Dafa’s greatness.
During the most recent parade, I was the only person to clarify the truth to the bystanders. The parade route was some distance from the big crowds, and I didn’t see any Chinese people until later I saw an older couple watching the parade. I greeted them without hesitating. When I mentioned Falun Dafa, the wife didn’t appear to be shocked but showed a good understanding. “Actually, they are quite good,” she said.
When I asked her to quit the CCP, she said that she hadn’t joined any CCP organization. Before I left, they thanked me for giving them more information about Dafa. I was so thankful to Master when I said goodbye to them. In the past, I would think a lot and send forth righteous thoughts for a long time before I clarified the truth to a Chinese person. This time, I didn’t think too much before I spoke to them. Thank you, Master, for helping me get rid of bad intentions. With Master’s help, this couple knew more about Dafa.
By clarifying the truth to people, I’ve found lots of my attachments. For example, I would be overly enthused after I clarified the truth to Westerners yet afraid of being criticized and hesitant when I clarified the truth to Chinese. I was also fearful. I will continue to eliminate these attachments as I clarify the truth, until I no longer have any attachments.
Thank you, Master and fellow practitioners.
(Presented at the 2019 Canada Fa Conference)