Power of Dafa: Getting Rid of Resentment Towards My Mother-in-Law
(Minghui.org) I met my husband after moving to a new flat with my parents. He lived upstairs, and asked someone to tell me that he wanted to marry me.
We got engaged and had a civil ceremony. However, even before the wedding ceremony took place, I wanted to divorce him because of his mother. The officials did not grant me a divorce. My health started deteriorating after that.
After I practiced Falun Dafa, my health improved, my marriage was saved, and I let go of my resentment towards my mother-in-law.
We had planned to have a wedding ceremony one month after the civil ceremony. The wedding ceremony is a formal public announcement of one's marriage. Thus, we decided not to live as a married couple until the actual wedding ceremony.
My husband's parents promised to foot the cost of our wedding and that they would also buy some furniture and other daily necessities for us. My parents suggested that we have a simple wedding, just for our relatives.
My relatives came from other cities to attend our wedding, but my husband's parents had not arranged any wedding festivities. They sent a message to my parents, saying that there was no need for a wedding, as the civil ceremony was legal.
My mother-in-law came to my parents' home, holding a stick in her hand. She first pointed it at me, and then knocked on the bed with the stick, and shouted: “Are you going to marry a person or money? If you want to marry a person, then the registration counts as you getting married. If you want to marry someone wealthy, you married the wrong person.”
I was too petrified to say anything, and tears ran down my face. Then she slammed the door and left.
My parents-in-law's flat was just above my parents' flat. When my mother-in-law saw me standing on the balcony talking to people, she poured a full basin of water over me. Then, another time, she threw chicken manure when she saw me on the balcony. I tried to talk to her whenever I saw her, but she just kept spitting on the floor.
Her actions disturbed me greatly, and I wondered how she would treat me after I moved in with her son. I wanted to get a divorce, but since we had a civil wedding already, I couldn't bear the humiliation. In desperation I wanted to commit suicide and wrote a note.
My father was on the verge of death and my mother took care of him and my grandfather. There was no way I could leave her alone, so I decided to seek a divorce.
Anyone who wanted to get a divorce required permission from their employer, the local residential office and the Department of Civil Affairs. They denied my request. The local court did not approve my request for divorce either, because we had not lived as a married couple.
To bring peace to my mind, my mother suggested that I no longer think of the wedding or my mother-in-law, but only to focus on my husband's moral qualities.
We eventually had our wedding three years after we were registered. His parents promised to give us 500 yuan, but again did not keep their promise.
My child was born a year later, but my mother-in-law did not look after me, which is customary in China for at least a month after giving birth.
She also complained that I was too squeamish, and my husband kept complaining about it, too. I was in tears frequently.
I started to have problems with my eyes, hands and wrists, and I was diagnosed with rheumatoid arthritis in my legs. I went to many hospitals and took all kinds of medicine, but nothing helped.
Experiencing the Power of Dafa
Then, I was diagnosed with a heart problem when my child was seven years old, and I could not take care of myself. While I was at a low point in my life, a friend suggested that I practice Falun Dafa. She told me about the extraordinary power of this cultivation practice.
The font size of the main book of Dafa, Zhuan Falun, looked quite big when I first read it. In fact, I noticed later that the letters were not that big. As I read it, I realized that this cultivation was what I had been searching for – it told me about the meaning of life.
Soon after I started practicing Falun Dafa, my illnesses disappeared. I wanted to tell everyone to practice Dafa. I bought some Dafa books and videotapes, and gave them to my relatives, in the hopes that they would also benefit from the practice.
I had never called my mother-in-law “mother,” as I deeply resented her. After becoming a practitioner, my resentment slowly faded away. I knew that as a cultivator, I had to follow the Dafa principles of Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance.
I also came to understand that whatever happened could be related to how I treated her in a prior life. To improve our relationship, I visited her frequently and took some food that she liked. I also helped her to do some housework.
My mother-in-law has five children, and she favored her eldest daughter. She helped with their children, but they always quarreled. Thus, I invited my parents-in-law to live with us.
My father-in-law later became very ill. I resigned my job and looked after him until he died. I cooked three meals a day and fed him. He lost control over his bowels, and I helped my mother-in-law wash him and change his clothes. The doctors and other patients admired my parents-in-law for having a such a good daughter. My mother-in-law told them: “She is not my daughter, she is my daughter-in-law.”
My mother-in-law moved into a new flat after my father-in-law died. I helped her decorate the place, as well as helped prepare her retirement documents.
When I went to the Labor Bureau to get her pension, an official asked: “Why are you going through all this trouble just to help an old mother-in-law?” I told him because she is my mother.
My mother-in-law lives in a nice new flat and has a worry-free life. Her neighbors admire her and often ask how she found such a nice daughter-in-law.
My family lives in harmony, because I practice Falun Dafa, live by the principles “Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance.”