How a Rumor Helped Me Improve
(Minghui.org) Over time, I began to let up in my cultivation, and the old forces took advantage of my shortcoming. Officers from the local domestic security division spread rumors that I had betrayed fellow practitioners, that I was a “Judas.” These rumors alienated me from other practitioners and interfered with our local efforts to clarify the truth.
When I first heard local practitioners repeating the rumors, I couldn't stay calm and felt wronged. After I calmed down, I recalled Master's teachings:
“For a cultivator, looking within is a magical tool.” (“Fa Teaching at the 2009 Washington DC International Fa Conference” from Teaching the Fa at the Conference IX)
“When you meet with a conflict, it doesn’t matter whether you are in the right. You should be asking yourself, “What on my part isn’t right in this situation? Might it really be that there is something wrong on my part?” You should all be thinking this way, with your first thought being to scrutinize yourself to try to find the problem. Whoever is not like this is not in fact a true cultivator of Dafa. It is a magical tool in our cultivation. This is a distinguishing feature of our Dafa disciples’ cultivation.” (“What is a Dafa Disciple” from Teaching the Fa at the Conference XI)
“For a cultivator, all the frustrations he comes across among everyday people are trials, and all the compliments he receives are tests.” (“A Cultivator is Naturally Part of It” from Essentials for Further Advancement)
Since most of the practitioners in our are are elderly and I am young, I developed an attachment to feeling good about myself whenever I made a little breakthrough producing informational materials. When the rumors began to spread, I looked within and found deeply hidden attachments such as zealotry, a show-off mentality, attachment to comfort, and relying on others. I was not willing to listen to criticism. I had been afraid to go out to talk to people about the persecution because I was afraid that my non-practitioner husband would get angry.
I regarded my achievements as products of my own abilities rather than the results of Master's help and arrangements. I got impatient and careless when I did things and always felt that, whatever I did, others would understood and tolerate.
When the rumors began spreading, I asked Master to strengthen my righteous thoughts. I denied all the wrong factors the old forces had imposed on me. I was determined to not be moved by this interference, and, by my actions, I would prove that I had not betrayed fellow practitioners. I would not let the shortcomings in my cultivation disgrace Dafa's good name.
I began to clarify the truth face to face. At first, it was hard to open my mouth, but now I see people as if they are long-lost family members. At first I was ridiculed and verbally abused by those who did not understand, but now they tell me to be careful, and some even give me their phone number so we can stay in touch. I often hear many heartfelt “thank you’s,” which is my greatest reward after a day's effort.
Soon after I decided to prove by my actions that I had not betrayed anyone, another practitioner realized that, since I was in a better financial situation than the others, the evil had tried to isolate me and prevent us from working together well. Still other practitioners said that they should also look inward during conflicts.
When we decided to cultivate together solidly and cooperate with each other to get rid of the old forces' interference, all the gaps disappeared and the misunderstandings between us vanished.
In this process I had a deeper understanding of something Master said:
“So whether it is good things or bad things you run into, so long as you cultivate in Dafa, they are all positive, to be sure.” (Teaching the Fa in San Francisco, 2005)
Had I viewed what happened with an ordinary person’s attachment to proving who is right or wrong I would have been stuck in the cycle of resentment and holding grudges.
Thank you, Master, for your guidance and care. Thank you, my fellow practitioners, for your cooperation and selfless help. And thank you to my fellow practitioners who argued with me! You've helped me by pointing out where I need to improve!