(Minghui.org) I always had problems with cultivating my speech, as I was under the impression that speaking one's mind openly was good. I pointed out other practitioners' shortcomings without considering whether it would hurt them, or whether they could accept it. That put a lot of pressure on them and was often hurtful. Actually, I was unable to tolerate the shortcomings of other practitioners – I was neither kind nor compassionate.
I did not pay much attention to this problem until I had some big xinxing tests involving three other practitioners. I then realized that I needed to cultivate my speech.
Feeling Wronged Instead of Looking Within
Hui (alias) and Ming (alias) had difficulty resisting lust and desire. It seemed that Lian (alias) was also going to make the same mistake. In order to warn her, I told her about the mistakes Hui and Ming had made. Lian then told Hui and Ming what I had said. They were very angry and began to resent me.
I did not look within for any attachments, but instead felt that I had been wronged. I thought that I was helping them, and that they did not appreciate it, and hated me for it. I became resentful in my heart. I looked at the situation with a human heart, not from the perspective of the Fa. I did not cultivate myself!
I thus opened a loophole for the old forces to persecute me. My teeth started to ache, and my face became swollen. I also experienced terrible headaches and four sleepless nights.
I subsequently listened to Master's lectures in Guangzhou and started to look within. Things had not happened accidentally. My human attachments had opened a loophole allowing the old forces to persecute me. Otherwise, they would not dare to touch me because Master protects practitioners at all times.
So what caused my toothache? It had to be something to do with my mouth. I realized that I was not cultivating my speech, so the evil took advantage of it. If those practitioners gave up cultivation because of me, I would have committed a huge sin and would have caused a great loss to our whole body.
I knew that I needed to eliminate my resentfulness, grievances, and complaining attitude. I also had to let go of my pursuit of fame. Everything that happened in my cultivation was for the best. I, indeed, had to thank other practitioners. Without them, how could my attachments be exposed?
Because I had improved my xinxing, Master arranged for Hui and Ming to come see me. I apologized to them and sincerely thanked them for helping me get rid of my attachments. I told them how I realized my attachments and tried to eliminate them. They were happy to hear that.
My grievances disappeared, as did my toothache and headaches. Everything was back to normal. I was amazed by the power of looking within, and the immense power of Falun Dafa.
Accepting Only What Master Gives
I had a sore on my neck for 11 years before I started practicing Falun Dafa. It looked ugly and was terribly itchy. Neither Chinese medicine nor Western medicine had a cure for it. But it healed after I started practicing Falun Dafa in 1998, but re-appeared in 2010 and lasted for a long time. The sore was itchy, but I knew it was not an illness, and must be caused by an attachment.
Practitioners in my area started to lodge criminal complaints against Jiang Zemin in May 2015. I lodged a complaint and also helped 20 practitioners write their complaints.
I then realized that I had a strong attachment to showing off. I was showing off to validate myself and seek fame among practitioners. I said to Master that I did not want to show off, that it was pushed onto me by the old forces, and that I only accept what Master gives to me.
My neck was smooth the next day, and the sore was gone. Master's grace healed it for me!
Category: Improving Oneself
