Discovering a Major Barrier to My Improvement: Arrogance

(Minghui.org) I would like to share my understanding regarding arrogance, or attachment to self. Hopefully, some practitioners will find it useful.

Friction between myself and another practitioner in our group recently became very intense. I felt insulted, angry, disappointed, and had other negative emotions, but understood that they were only superficial things and that the root of those feelings was hidden deeply inside me. I had been looking for the reason for several years, but couldn't identify the true cause of those bad external manifestations.

This practitioner recently started pointing out my arrogance. As soon as we started talking about something, he immediately said that I was harboring arrogance and that it was hindering my progress. He talked about it so often that I finally started looking inside about this shortcoming.

It wasn’t that I turned a deaf ear to what he said, but that I simply had no idea what arrogance was. At last, I began taking it to heart. I even looked up “arrogance” on the Internet, and this is what I read (summarized): “Arrogance is a desire to consider oneself to be independent and the only reason for all the good that is in you and around you.”

Identifying Arrogance

1. Feeling that only I am right and perfect while all others are wrong2. Self-pity, hidden self-pity (self-centered)3. Being domineering, proud, treating co-workers with contempt (categorizing people)4. A patronizing attitude5. Humiliating self and others6. The opinion that “Without me, the world won't exist”7. Preoccupation with self. Concentrating on what others think of me8. Talking about my own problems too much9. Boasting, thinking that “I am better than others”10. Refusing help—“I’ll do it myself”11. A desire to dominate, receive glory, and honor12. A thought that “My work is the most important”13. Rivalry (unhealthy competition)14. A desire to argue and prove my own case15. An intention to judge others16. Using words that others don't understand17. Unwillingness to share knowledge18. Irritability (unwillingness to forgive), anger directed inside19. Sarcasm, belittling others20. Unwillingness to admit that I am arrogant

It is difficult to express in words how overwhelmed I was by the feeling of awakening. I realized that my entire life was saturated with this arrogance.

As I realized the depth, thickness, and power of this “root” cause, I was terrified of how blind and ignorant I was before. But I also felt joyful that at last this root was identified, and now I could start to eliminate it.

For several days I felt like an enlightened one. I decided to share all my notes on arrogance with my vice president at work. Before I read it out loud, I explained to her that I had realized that I’d been doing many things wrong, and had generated so many bad things within me.

As I was reading, she had a look on her face that said, “Finally, you get it.” I thought, “Why don't you see that it is about you, too?” As soon as this thought arose, I understood that it was my arrogance rearing its head with #15, an intention to judge others.

It was almost funny. I looked back at the last year of my work in this organization and realized that all the friction I had with the management was the result of several of the arrogance aspects listed above.

When the practitioner called me to resolve some issues, I told myself that I shouldn't insist on my point of view. But as soon as I felt that he “wasn't right,” I started to put forth reasons why I was right. I caught myself and recalled: #1 Feeling that only I am right and perfect while all others are wrong.

Again, I found it amusing. Long ago my mother told me, “Pacify your arrogance.” At that time, I thought that I understood what she meant, but, actually, I didn't truly understand until now. I told myself, “Pacify your arrogance,” so I ceased to argue with that practitioner.

I began to feel light as if I had been a bottle full of dirt and some of the dirt had been removed, just like Master talked about in Zhuan Falun.

In the story about Shen Gongbao in “Jealousy” in Zhuan Falun, doesn't Master tell us about arrogance which led to jealousy? When he talks about Han Xin, doesn't Master give us an example of what a person who possesses great humility and patience can achieve?

Actually, it is difficult to express in words everything that I understood and found in myself. I am sharing my understanding because I think there may be other practitioners who haven’t detected this arrogance, or maybe they haven’t thought seriously about this problem yet.

We need to be sure to open our eyes to any gaps like this and not let hidden attachments block our progress.

Master said,

“I’ll tell you, for years I have been continually saying that Dafa disciples’ abilities are tremendous, yet many people don’t believe this since those abilities were not allowed to be seen. Under the effect of righteous thoughts, everything around you, as well as you yourself, will undergo changes. Yet you have never thought to give it a try. The old forces as well as the interference from the evil elements are precisely exploiting the gaps in your thinking. That’s what they have been doing all these years. All along the old forces have been directing rotten spirits and the factors of the evil Party to do this, causing you to fail in your efforts to save people. They do this because they don’t have the ability to defeat you in a direct fight.” (“20th Anniversary Fa Teaching” from Teaching the Fa at the Conference XI)