Letting Go of Human Notions and Reasons to Validate Myself
Bowl Breaks and Helps Me Realize my Mistake
Some of my fellow Beijing Falun Dafa practitioners were waiting outside when Xinan Forced Labor Camp was shut down, and I was released. The authorities told me to keep in contact with the local 610 Office and I agreed.
As I finished washing the dishes at home one day, a bowl fell apart in my hands. How did I manage to break it so easily?
I realized that my decision to stay in touch with the 610 Office was wrong, and that I shouldn't have this thought. There are so many things for practitioners to do, that we can't afford to waste time complying with the police just so they can keep track on us.
Improving Family Relations
I read through all of the Falun Dafa books and lectures within a month of returning home. I then joined a group making phone calls to members of the public to inform them about Dafa and the persecution.
With the help of other practitioners, I learned how to make calls and text messages very rapidly. I shared this knowledge with others, helping them become more proficient at this method of reaching out to people.
Every evening at 6:30 p.m., my wife and son, who are both practitioners, helped me to make phone calls. We took 15 cell phones with us, and traveled on different bus routes to best avoid being tracked and monitored by the authorities. We made calls and played recorded messages until 10 p.m.. We did this regardless of the weather.
There was a time when we could help over 20 people per day quit the Chinese Communist Party (CCP) and its affiliated organizations.
However, we began to slack off and not put our hearts into it. As a result, the number of people we helped to quit the CCP dropped. We realized that we needed to upgrade our xinxing so that we could do the three things well and better follow the path arranged by Teacher.
“...That is why it's said that always cultivating as if you were just starting will surely result in achieving your ultimate rank.” (“Fa Teaching at the 2009 Greater New York International Fa Conference”)
Although we are a small group of three, we kept making calls every day.
One hot summer day, we decided to put up posters in a number of large buildings around town that explained how hundreds of thousands of people were suing Jiang Zemin. Jiang, the former leader of the CCP, launched the persecution of Falun Gong back in 1999.
We walked up and down the stairs with sweat dripping off us, but we felt fresh and comfortable. We even managed to help six people quit the CCP, which hadn't happened for quite a while. It seemed that only with our xinxing upgraded could we help save more people.
On some occasions, I made wrong turns when driving as I wasn't paying attention to what I was doing. My wife became very angry, and grew more and more frustrated as similar situations happened again and again. I tried to look within each time and endure the criticism, but it didn't make the situation any better. I kept telling myself to take every precaution to prevent these kinds of situations occurring again.
We were on the brink of fighting with each other one day, as everything seemed to go wrong for us. I persuaded myself to look within and controlled my temper before losing it. As the day was drawing to an end, I suddenly realized that I was wrong to have the thought stuck in my mind that my wife was hot tempered and easily angered.
In the 20 years that we have been Dafa practitioners, I had formed the notion that she was hot-tempered. I had been looking outward rather than inward for years. I always blamed her for her hot temper whenever we had a conflict. I didn't realize that the confrontation was actually to help me improve my xinxing.
I ignored this notion for years, but was finally glad to have found it. I took immediate action, and bravely addressed the problem until it was completely eliminated.
After my wife visited her hometown, I found cultivation difficult: studying the Fa, doing the three things, and getting up early in the morning to practice the exercises. I had to deal with all these situations by myself.
It was easy to slack off with what I had normally done with my wife. I didn't even bother to open Zhuan Falun the whole day.
I came to understand why my son had failed to advance diligently on his path of cultivation during that time. I didn't create a good environment for us to help one another. As parents, we had an unshakable responsibility to guide our children in the right way of cultivation.
Sometimes I got angry with my son for what I thought was his not being diligent enough in cultivation. In fact, I had developed a human mentality of forcing him to study the Fa more because he is my son. But he only became more resistant.
I was upset and angry about his attitude. I realized that I had to adjust my mindset and break through the attachment of forcing him to do something.
I suggested that we take a walk in a nearby park after dinner. My son seemed happy to join me. I carried the mobile phones I used for calling people to tell them about Dafa and the persecution, while he only took his work phone. I insisted that he take his other phones, but he refused.
I erupted. “How inconsiderate you are! I won’t go if you insist on having things your own way.”
“No problem!” he shouted in anger. “I won’t go either if you force me to do what you want.” We stared at each other for a while, but I eventually gave in, and said, “Do as you wish. Let’s go.” I almost forgot I was a practitioner and didn't think that it was a cultivation test for me.
It wasn't long before another cultivation test came. On August 22, 2015, my son told me that he was going out for an English class. Then in early September I found a cinema ticket for August 22.
My head felt like it was going to burst, but then a voice rang in my head: “Calm down! Nothing is a coincidence on the path of cultivation, and nothing should stir my heart or interfere with my righteous thoughts. I should only focus on good thoughts and abandon the human mentality.”
After my son came home, I asked if he had been to the cinema. He nodded, and I managed to stop myself from questioning him further.
I then noticed a positive change in my son’s behavior: When he went to his English class, instead of eating at a restaurant as usual, he started to have dinner at home with us before going to class.
My Relatives File Lawsuits Against Jiang Zemin
I showed my relatives, who are non-practitioners, the criminal complaint I filed against Jiang Zemin, the former head of the CCP, for instigating the persecution of Falun Dafa. They all decided to file their own lawsuits against him.
The more human notions we develop, the deeper we can be dragged into everyday concerns. Teacher saved us from the brink of destruction and taught us the great law of the universe to help us break out of delusion. We should follow the Fa and do the three things well in order to live up to all he has done for us.
Teacher would be most pleased to see every one of us returns to our true homes.