Responsibilities and Personal Preferences
(Minghui.org) Something has bothered me for a long time—fellow practitioners always rely on me when we work on projects. I liked it at the beginning, but after it continued for a long period of time I started to feel tired. I often complained that others weren't considering my feelings. If I agreed to help them, they asked for my help endlessly, again and again. If I didn't agree to help, they complained about me, and even disliked me.
This happened often, and I became confused. I wondered why I always had these kinds of experiences and had to deal with people like this. I asked a friend of mine this question. He thought about it for a while, and replied, “Maybe it is because you enjoy it.” I then realized that these troubles were caused by my “personal preferences,” an attachment of mine.
I generally thought of myself as a nice person, being considerate and always willing to help others. But I never thought that I had this attachment. Because of my “personal preferences” I had caused troubles for myself, and exacerbated fellow practitioners' attachments of relying on me.
When we run into difficulties, we should encourage each other and listen to each other. But we should also try to solve problems by ourselves. Only then, can we improve.
There are no coincidences on the journey of cultivation. If we encounter problems, it indicates that we have some attachments that we need to eliminate.
Starting from the attachment to my personal preferences, I also found other attachments, such as seeking fame, validating myself, and wanting to control others.
As cultivators, we should act in accordance with the Fa, and follow the principles of Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance. We need to differentiate our responsibilities from our personal preferences. We should base our thoughts and actions on the Fa when we deal with others, and be truly responsible to fellow practitioners. Only by doing so will we be able to walk well on the path of cultivation, and able to validate the Fa well.