Young Practitioner: "Hard Decisions, Great Rewards"
(Minghui.org) Respected Master, dear fellow practitioners:
I’m a young man from Hungary who started practicing Falun Dafa in 2010. I would like to share some of my experiences.
Letting Go of Attachments about My Future
I graduated from high school in 2011 and attended a university to study dentistry, just as my parents had planned for me for years. I tried my best to keep up with my studies, cultivation, and doing the three things, but it was too much. Looking back, I see that I was too attached to getting good grades, and was unable to truly view things from a wide perspective, even though Master gave me hints during that time.
Through sharing together, a fellow practitioner helped me understand that validating the Fa by being successful in my studies was good, but that I also had to work on saving sentient beings.
“If you’re young and want to find time to study, there’s nothing wrong with that. But you should also participate in Dafa projects and do some things, and at the same time make good use of your time to study.” (“Fa Teaching Given at the 2014 San Francisco Fa Conference”)
With this understanding, things got better, and I discovered opportunities to clarify the truth. We also changed the time of our weekly demonstration in front of the Chinese Embassy so that I could join the activity, but looking at it from a larger perspective, I was still unable to handle the situation well and feel at ease.
I eventually came to the understanding that I simply was not able to spend the amount of time I wanted to on saving sentient beings. But I also needed more time for my studies, and the two together were just too much. So I started to think that maybe I was on the wrong track.
After one semester I tried to explain my situation to my non-practitioner parents, to let them know that maybe dentistry was not for me. But they kept pushing me, so I started the second semester.
There were more and more indications that this field of study was really not for me, and being chained down by studies for the next five years seemed like a lot of time in terms of my role in the Fa-rectification.
Since I was a practitioner, I assumed things would just go well, but they didn't. This was the first time since I'd become a practitioner that I did not do well in my studies and I started to wonder, "If everyday people can do better than I, and I'm a practitioner, then maybe I'm in the wrong place." I realized that becoming a dentist was what my parents wanted, not me, and I was attached to agreeing with them and meeting their requirements.
“As a practitioner, one must then conduct oneself by following this characteristic of the universe rather than the standards of everyday people.” (Zhuan Falun)
Putting Myself in Master's Hands
One day I had the definite thought that I should marry the fellow practitioner whom I'd been dating for some months. That evening while we were talking, she said she'd had the same idea. I took it as a hint from Master and we got engaged.
We decided to get married as soon as possible, so as to not leave any loopholes for the old forces, because we saw some bad examples among other practitioners. They had experienced unnecessary difficulties because they had problems with sentimentality, even though they were engaged to each other. Marriage is one thing, as I understand it, while being engaged is something quite different.
We got married on a beautiful day in March. Since then, we have shaped our lives in a direction where we can do the most in our cultivation and in doing the three things.
Overcoming Difficulties with Money
We had some savings from wedding gifts, but our income barely covered our expenses. I had left school and taken a new job to support my new family, but it paid very little. I really wanted to break out of this situation, and I must admit it was a motivation for me in my cultivation.
Things just got worse in the months that followed. The European FXH organized a meeting in Germany, and my wife, her sister-in-law, and I decided to go together in one car. The day before we left, we lost the money we'd planned to take with us, so we were down to our last few cents.
The meeting was very good, with intensive Fa study for three days. I also gained a helpful understanding on the issue of finances. We asked a practitioner who is well off to share his understanding on money after explaining our situation to him.
He said he sees money as a living being. He feels that there’s a misunderstanding with some practitioners, that, "since we’re practitioners, we should not be attached to anything," so their attitude is "I’m not attached to money" – meaning, "I don’t want money." But since money is a living being, if it sees you don’t want it, it will not come to you. This was helpful to me, because I realized that was indeed my attitude.
Our tribulations were not over, however. On the way home our car broke down in another country. Luckily, we were close to home and a fellow practitioner came in his car and trailed us back.
My boss warned me one day that I wasn't getting my work done, and that if things didn't get better, he would find someone else. I started to get upset, but then calmed down and looked inward as a practitioner. He was right, and I realized the problem was that I simply did not want to work. I had had a comfortable life as a student, and being out in the workforce was much harder.
I started working wholeheartedly, and two weeks later a practitioner in another country contacted me and offered me a job. Since then our situation has improved, and we can join more Dafa activities that require traveling. I’m very thankful to Master for this.
These are my understandings at my current level. Please point out anything not correct.
Thank you, Respected Master! Thank you, fellow practitioners!
Category: Journeys of Cultivation