Learning to Be Diligent in Cultivation on My Own
(Minghui.org) When I entered 9th grade, we were told that we could go home only once a month. I didn't like the idea and rationalized that I might not be able to study the Fa and do the exercises while away from home. But, in reality, I didn't want to leave my parents.
There are two ways that a regular student like me may obtain exemption and become a commuting student, with one being a sickness report from a hospital and the other by using one's connections. Either one is not that difficult to achieve. However, both ways are unacceptable to a practitioner who lives by Dafa's principles of Truthfulness, Compassion, Forbearance.
My entire family practices Dafa. Pretending to be sick is following the path arranged by the old forces. And, getting my way by using our connections is not something a practitioner should do.
The first week at school was tough. I could not keep up with Fa study and doing the exercises. I asked for permission to visit my parents, and when they saw my haggard look and tears, they were worried.
Although they knew that this violated the Fa principles, my parents went to their connections for help to get me approved as a commuter student.
However, it didn't quite go as planned, as we ran into quite a few roadblocks at the end of the approval process. My parents realized that Master had arranged for me to stay in the dormitory and we had a long talk about the issue.
“So, as you cultivate in the society of ordinary people, you are either being polluted by ordinary society or you are changing ordinary society. And that's for sure." (“Teaching the Fa in San Francisco, 2005”)
I decided to walk on the path Master arranged for me. There was lots of homework after school, keeping me rather busy. At home, my parents made sure that I was diligent in studying the Fa and doing the exercises, but at school I had to discipline myself.
The Fa-rectification is advancing and the path for each practitioner is very narrow. I have to learn how to cultivate diligently and let go of relying on my parents.
After changing my mindset, I made my plan to study the Fa daily. Early in the morning or at night after lights out were my only two options. The dormitory is checked every night, so I sent righteous thoughts that said, “I'm invisible when I study the Fa.” I studied the Fa with a flashlight while hiding under my comforter.
It wasn't easy, because it was hot under the comforter and I sweat a lot. However, after crawling out from underneath the comforter I felt an indescribable happiness and a sacredness in my heart.
It is difficult to keep up with Fa study but I have become more diligent than ever before. Master said,
“When human thinking gains the upper hand, that person heads toward humanness; when divine thinking and a person's righteous thoughts gain the upper hand, he heads toward godhood.” (“Teaching the Fa in San Francisco, 2005”)
Running into Difficulties
I was planning to study ten pages at night and ten pages in the morning. However, sometimes I forgot to set the alarm. Also at times the alarm didn't go off for no fault of mine.
Before studying the Fa in the morning, I thanked the clock for waking me up. I also said to the clock, “You are my Fa instrument, please wake me up on time.” Yet, I continued to have problems waking up. That's when I recalled what Master said.
"For a cultivator, looking within is a magical tool." (“Fa Teaching at the 2009 Washington DC International Fa Conference”)
When looking within, I found that I have the attachment of laziness. It was very cold in the morning, which stopped me from getting up immediately. I fell asleep after the alarm went off, and slept until it was time for everyone to get up, which made me miss the Fa study. After I got rid of my attachment to laziness, I said to the clock, “I was wrong. You must ring and I will get up immediately.” The next morning, the alarm clock rang on time.
Now my grades have improved a lot and I am among the top 50in my grade, an improvement from being among the top 70 or 80 in my grade. I believe Master opened my wisdom.
Reflecting on the past few months, I feel I have become a genuine disciple, maturing and cultivating on the basis of the Fa. I will diligently walk the path that Master arranged for me and return home with Master.