Changing My Sentimentality Toward My Husband
(Minghui.org) Many practitioners have been exercising their legal rights in the “Sue Jiang” movement. But old forces will take every opportunity to disrupt the trend, and I met with resistance when I tried to send my complaint. In the end, I realized that this resistance was only the result of an attachment that I have harbored over many years.
I filed a criminal complaint against Jiang Zemin without my husband's knowledge in June. A confirmation of delivery arrived two days later. I helped other practitioners write their legal complaints, as well.
My husband saw my draft and the delivery receipt one afternoon when I was typing a criminal complaint for a fellow practitioner. He became furious, yelling and screaming while he pulled out the computer's power cord.
“I've supported your cultivation for all these years! How could you do this?” he asked angrily. “You've exposed our personal information–you've ruined us! You're not allowed to do...to do this kind of stuff anymore!”
He stormed out of the room and did not talk to me for the rest of the day.
Almost immediately, a line from Master's teachings flashed into my mind: “Just by staying unaffected you will be able to handle all situations.” (Teaching the Fa at the Conference in the Midwest-U.S.)
I was able to remain calm and unaffected, in spite of his anger.
Later that evening, my husband called in my cousin to try and persuade me to stop sending complaints. My cousin called the complaints “silly” and wondered why I would do such a thing.
“I am a practitioner,” I replied, “a practitioner who has benefited from Falun Gong. I must speak out for the practice and Master Li. I have to speak out for all the practitioners that were so silently and unjustly slaughtered in the persecution. In fact, you could–and should–file complaints against Jiang, too; what he did was a crime against all humanity.”
My cousin was convinced by my stance. He knew from all these years that the Chinese Communist Party punished anyone they saw fit. “Right” and “wrong” were not words in their dictionary, nor were they concepts that had any meaning to the Party. He suggested that I go to a hideout to keep safe; my husband had suggested my old hometown.
But I would not leave. I told them both that I would surely be all right: I had Master's protection, and they would not be able to lay a finger on me.
Overcoming My Attachment to Sentimentality
My husband is a generally kind and often timid person, but he has the final say at home. He's saved my life before, so I've treated him with nothing but gratitude for the past forty-some years.
Because of this attachment to sentimentality, I always let him have his way and was afraid to make him upset. I noticed after the computer incident that this was a potential loophole that the old forces would exploit, and did my best to cover it.
I studied the Fa and sent righteous thoughts after my husband banned me from the computer. It felt very calming and comfortable, as if nothing had transpired between my husband and me. I then realized that Master was helping and encouraging me to continue in the right direction.
The next day, my husband was still cross; he refused breakfast and lunch, and drank in their place. With Master's help, I sent righteous thoughts to eliminate the old forces' influence behind this physical manifestation.
In the evening, my husband's attitude suddenly changed. He ate dinner (albeit quietly). Afterwards, he even went out to buy fruits for me to put before Master's photo. We began talking and laughing with each other as usual, as if nothing had happened.
It truly is as Master says in Zhuan Falun, that “[a]fter passing the shady willow trees, there will be bright flowers and another village ahead!”
My husband has since become more considerate. He even helps me distribute truth -clarification materials and put up Falun Gong posters–something he never used to do. It is apparent that Master has not only taken care of me but also him.
Now, my forty-year-long attachment to sentimentality is gone, and my righteous actions are no longer limited by my emotions. I feel very relaxed.
During this time, dozens of brown spots that had grown under both sides of my armpits disappeared without a trace.
I realized from these two experiences that Master is always next to me and helping me improve in my cultivation. Master taught us in Zhuan Falun that “cultivation depends on one's own efforts, while the transformation of gong is done by one's master.”
I am sure that I can pass all tribulations as long as I firmly follow Master's guidance.