Eliminate Selfishness

(Minghui.org) I thought I was an unselfish person. When someone told me, “You are the most selfish person I have ever come across,” I broke into tears. My daughter once said, “Do not think you are unselfish just because you have donated a lot of money.” I looked inward for a while and then understood what it meant to be unselfish.

I established a materials production site at my home with the help of fellow practitioners in 2008. I learned how to make truth-clarifying materials, and how to print Falun Dafa books. The quantity was small and I distributed most of the materials by myself.

When a large materials production site had to be split into smaller ones, fellow practitioners suggested that I produce materials for 50 practitioners. I refused because I thought the smaller the better. I could only produce materials for a maximum of 25 practitioners. They had to choose someone else.

However, it exposed my selfishness. I was satisfied with my current situation and unwilling to cooperate with others.

Letting Go Of Selfishness Amidst Conflicts

Master said,

“Cultivation practice must take place through tribulations so as to test whether you can part with and care less about different kinds of human sentimentality and desires.” (Lecture Four in Zhuan Falun)

I hadn't seen practitioner L for years. Recently she visited me. Her husband was also a practitioner, but they only studied the Fa and did nothing else. Once we studied the Fa and shared our experiences together, they improved and started to tell people about quitting the Chinese Communist Part (CCP) and its affiliates. However, we started to get interference. Practitioner L suspected her husband had an affair with a female classmate, and later she even suspected me of having an affair with her husband. I got drawn into their family affair. I became depressed and decided to no longer associate with them.

I sent the Minghui Weekly paper to them and found out that L's husband was in the hospital. I wasn't sure what to do, to stay away from them to avoid any trouble, or help them with their cultivation. I reluctantly sent them some experience sharing articles and Master's lectures. I couldn't calm down to study the Fa.

I asked the couple to join a group Fa study. But, they had all kinds of excuses. Being worried, practitioner L came down with symptoms of a serious illness. I simply told them to look inward and didn't think that what happened was also related to me. I even complained to other practitioners that the couple didn't look inside. Actually, my thoughts strengthened negative effects in other dimensions. I was sick for three days the three times when returning from the couple's home.

I wanted to stop going to their house. However, I still knew that practitioners were one body and I shouldn't let anything in other dimensions persecute this couple without doing anything. I realized that only if I held righteous thoughts and totally eliminated my selfishness, could I really help them.

I asked two other practitioners to go with me to their house, to share experiences and to send righteous thoughts. After that, I could go to their home without experiencing any problem. In all that happened, Master had hinted to me that I needed to eliminate my selfishness. After I improved and reached the requirements of a higher level, Master removed the difficulties.

Learning Cooperation Among Practitioners

Master said,

“Without conflicts arising or opportunities to improve your xinxing, you cannot make progress. If everyone is nice to one another, how do you practice cultivation? ” (Lecture Nine in Zhuan Falun)

I had reached a point where I was very satisfied with my materials production site. But a practitioner brought me many Shen Yun DVDs that had additional words on the cover, and asked me to help fix the problem. Finally, I did it.

I asked her to stop making new DVDs and she agreed. But, she continued to bring more DVDs and it stopped me from doing anything else.

She kept bringing me more DVDs. The cover was not well-done, pictures were blurry, and words were too small to read. I didn't want to help her but somehow, I admired her good character, and she was not upset even when I refused her.

I thought it might be Master's arrangement to help us work as a whole body. I felt that I eliminated much of my selfishness. But, I still didn't understand why this kept happening.

I remembered that before I practiced Dafa I often helped others repair expensive clothes. I felt very good when being praised. I also was looking for flaws in others. I still held the same attitude and realized that I was actually verifying myself, which is selfishness.

I knew that I must look inward and that Master had already set up the environment for my cultivation. I didn't use it, but tried to find a cultivation environment that suited me.

I remembered that when I was asked to produce materials for 50 practitioners, it was an opportunity to work with other practitioners as one body. If I am always reluctant to work with others, how could I improve?

There were other occasions when I didn't want to cooperate with other practitioners. I asked myself “Can I really find time to make it up? I actually was avoiding Master's arrangements. I wanted only to do things that came naturally to me because of my selfishness. What Master wants is “...whatever you do, you should consider others first, so as to attain the righteous Enlightenment of selflessness and altruism.” (“Non-Omission in Buddha-Nature” in Essentials for Further Advancement)