(Minghui.org)
Greetings to compassionate and magnificent Master!
The year of 2012 was both a short and long year for me. When I cultivated well and strove forward vigorously, I felt as if time was flying by. However, when I slacked off, time seemed to go by much slower. It was a year full of rich lessons and achievements. When I encountered certain things I went to extremes and other things I dealt with in my own way. My attachment to “doing things” and my human notion of “wanting to do more” caused some losses to Fa-validating projects.
This past year I worked diligently on the projects I was responsible for. I saw some breakthroughs in overcoming my attachments and human notions to worrying, being self-critical, and being timid. I shared my cultivation experiences at a large Fa-study group. I helped out and quietly harmonized efforts when I understood what was lacking in the coordination of Dafa projects.
During the past year, I also constantly received encouragement, care, and stick warnings from Master. Through studying the Fa, I came to the profound understanding and realization that to greet Master is to validate the Fa and save sentient beings. With this realization, I saw my name written on “the golden banner of the universe.” I experienced something profound while I have been writing down my understandings of the Fa and recording my cultivation experiences of helping out with the Internet Fa conference for Dafa practitioners. I climbed over a mountain so high that it went straight up into the sky. The mountaintop disappeared into the clouds.
When I went to extremes in dealing with important matters while validating Dafa, Master gave me a stick warning. The health of a member of my family worsened due to an overdose of medicine.
There is a lot that I want to share. I would like to talk about how my thinking has changed while cultivating.
Removing human notions and transcending to actively save sentient beings
I went back to my hometown for the Chinese New Year last year. Between the change of environment, socializing and the emotions that come up around family, I started acting like an everyday person and couldn't get myself out of that state. Everything I encountered while I was there played like a movie in my head. Over and over again I saw all of the minor and intricate details. I couldn't get rid of them or suppress them. The most minor details, such as a person's posture, a look, a gesture would interfere with me for several days.
I couldn't figure out why this was happening to me. I felt powerless even though I tried very hard to stop the thought karma. I couldn't find the source of the problem. I mentally prepared myself before I went home for the Chinese New Year. I decided to eliminate all of the interference that could possibly come up and walk my path well. I would always remember I was here to save sentient beings. However, when I looked back after my vacation was over, I found that I had not done any better than the year before.
After attending my husband's birthday party in February, I had a headache for a few days. It was only then that I started to think rationally with a clear mind. Why did I get seriously interfered with whenever I came into contact with everyday people? Why did I always stumble on this issue and then have regrets and feel dejected?
I asked Master, “Every time I am given a great opportunity to save sentient beings, I experience interference from being involved with them instead of saving them. Why?”
Suddenly I remembered what Master said,
“The environment is created by you, yourselves, and it, too, is essential for your improvement. I often find that you are in a good state of mind when you study the Fa or do the exercises, but when you come into contact with your work or other people, you become the same as everyday people. You sometimes seem even worse than everyday people. How could this be the conduct of a Dafa disciple?” (“Environment” from Essentials for Further Advancement)
I realized that my role as a Dafa disciple becomes unclear of as soon as I come into contact with everyday people. I should inspire, influence, and save others. Yet, instead of taking the leading role, I am playing the part of a humble and low-key bystander. I listen to ordinary people talk about ordinary matters with a great deal of interest. This is similar to accepting the things ordinary people say, because when one listens to them, “bad things will enter your ears.” Master said, “A person is like a container, and he is whatever he contains.” “With a mind full of such things, what’s a person able to do?” (“Melt Into the Fa” from Essentials for Further Advancement)
I was constantly moved by everyday people. Even though I would sometimes use the opportunity to clarify the truth, doing so had become a second thought. It suddenly became clear to me how crucial it is to have a righteous mind and a righteous intent. This problem had puzzled me for years and all of a sudden I understood.
Some of my human notions that had formed over a long period of time dominated me. For example, the first thing that I thought of when I learned that I was going to a party was how I looked. I thought about how I needed to get “dressed up” and make myself look good so it would be easier for me to clarify the truth. I thought about my looks and not about strengthening my righteous thoughts. I am introverted, modest and low-key when interacting with others. I often become very passive without consciously trying to. I willingly let others play the leading role and even let them control the subject of our conversation. I simply go along and act interested in what people say. It was very difficult for me to turn the conversation around and clarify the truth.
Master has given us the honor of the title Dafa Dizi;
“Dafa disciples, you are golden light in the mortal world, the hope of the world's people, Fa-disciples who help Master, and future Fa-Kings.” (“Congratulatory Message”)
Master also said,
“Everything in the world was established and created for the Fa-rectification, and Dafa disciples are the great figures of our time. Since ancient times the beings in all realms have waited in anticipation.” (“To the European Fa Conference in Stockholm”)
After I became aware of these human attachments, my wisdom continuously opened up. I left behind passive attitudes such as being shy and believing others were better than me. The people I met no longer seemed tough, or looked down on me. They became respectful and were willing to listen to me. Master said, “And human notions change, The degenerate things purged, Brightness now shines forth.” (“Born Anew” from Hong Yin (English Translation Version A))
Eliminating human notions and denying financial persecution
As if by coincidence, a practitioner who was in retail sales once asked me, “You spend quite a bit of money on Dafa materials. Are your family members okay with how much you spend?” Without thinking, I answered, “After my husband's expenses, how I spend the rest of the money is up to me.”
Not long after this conversation my husband's personal expenses increased rapidly. He went from spending only a few hundred yuan a month, to almost five times that. He usually spent about two to three hundred yuan on a pair of pants, and then all of a sudden the pants cost almost eight hundred yuan. The leather shoes he usually wore cost a little more than two hundred yuan and then he was spending almost five hundred yuan per pair. There was also the car maintenance, a new cell phone, treating others to dinners, gifts; it seemed never ending. Within a week after getting paid each month, we would have less than six hundred yuan left. Many expenses seemed necessary and I couldn't really say anything about his purchases. This financial situation lasted for a few months.
We spent the 10,000 yuan we had in savings and the 5,000 yuan per diem that his workplace had set aside for him. We were on the verge of an “economic crisis.” I was worried and very angry. I talked about this with fellow practitioners. Although they helped me find many of my attachments, it didn't change my financial situation. Until one day, I overheard a practitioner talking about how another practitioner had said something that was not grounded in the Fa. The practitioner who heard this didn't rectify the situation right away and she soon encountered problems herself as a result.
I was shocked when I heard this. Wasn't the financial persecution I was experiencing something that I had accepted? “Other than my husband's expenses, I made the decisions on how to spend the money.” He spent what he needed and then I would decide how to spend the rest. The old forces were taking advantage of a gap I created.
Everything is created by Dafa, and should naturally harmonize with the needs of Dafa. What Dafa needs should be first and foremost. The greed of an average person has no boundary. Master said,
“In modern society it’s not just seven emotions and six desires, but more like seventy emotions and sixty desires, right? There are desires of every possible sort.” (“What is a Dafa Disciple”)
Greed can only cause people to ignorantly accumulate more karma. Because one thought was not righteous, the old forces manipulated my husband to squander the resources I used for Dafa materials and he obtained karma. I am the one to blame.
While I was thinking this over, all of the worry and anger caused from my husband spending too much money, suddenly disappeared. I started to feel sorry for him. Because of my unrighteous thought, I left an opening for him to be used as a tool by the old forces. Everyday people are so pitiful. At that moment, I only felt compassion toward him. When I saw through the insidious arrangement of the old forces, I immediately sent forth righteous thoughts to eliminate all of the financial persecution aimed at me.
That night my husband came home feeling deflated, as he no longer had the evil factors sustaining him. He said that he was not satisfied with the shoes he ordered online and he had already lost interest in the new cell phone that cost almost five thousand yuan. He regretted spending so much money. He said he felt financially pressured and thought he would have more peace of mind if he had been more practical. Without any external force, my husband was rectified by the Fa. Because of some changes at his workplace, he was paid an extra month's salary and our “economic crisis” ended. I thank Master who balanced all of this out for me.
Eliminating human notions and dealing with problems righteously
Each year, Shen Yun Performing Arts produces a completely new dance and music program. The new Shen Yun performance DVD's were usually released a few days after the Chinese New Year. We would usually have to wait for them to be made. Some time around the Lantern Festival (the fifteenth day of the first month on the lunar calendar, marking the last day of the Chinese New Year celebration) we could start to distribute them. The previous year's Shen Yun DVD distribution project finishes around the end of the year. This left many practitioners idle while waiting for the new Shen Yun DVD's.
So that left a period of time where no Shen Yun DVD's were being distributed during the Chinese New Year holidays. Most people have time off during that time of the year, so they have time to watch Shen Yun. Yet, every year when we visit our family and friends for the New Year, we are out of Shen Yun DVD's to give them as gifts. I felt we were losing a great opportunity to save sentient beings. Master said,
“But do you realize something? Those who were originally meant to have been saved last year [by Shen Yun, but didn’t go], have lost the opportunity forever. That’s because Fa-rectification is unceasingly forging ahead, step by step, and when it arrives at one cosmic plane it is time for that level of people; when it reaches a certain heavenly kingdom above, or a certain layer of cosmic body, it is time for that group of people to come see [the show], and next time around [when Shen Yun performs], that seat will belong to someone else. Do you realize how many lives have been lost?! Do you know how I feel when I see those empty seats in the theater?” (“Dafa Disciples Must Study the Fa - Fa Teaching Given at the 2011 Washington DC Metro Area Fa Conference”)
By studying the Fa, I realized that we must utilize all the time we have well. Everything has been perfectly arranged and we cannot let those who are supposed to be saved during the Chinese New Year lose their opportunity. I discussed this with the practitioner I worked with and to my surprise she readily agreed. The practitioners who distributed Shen Yun DVD's in person, were also willing to work with me. There were other practitioners that would distribute them during the New Year's holiday. I produced a batch of Shen Yun DVD's from the previous years performance instead of waiting to copy the latest performance. I took some DVD'S to my hometown and the rest were left for the local practitioners to distribute.
When I returned from the holiday after the Lantern Festival, I heard all kinds of feedback. Some people said we had made too many DVD's and the local practitioners were under a lot of pressure to get them distributed. Some practitioners were not willing to distribute last year's performance and instead wanted to wait for the new version to be released. Each practice site had been assigned a number of copies to distribute and the neighboring counties also were given some to hand out. And there were some left over, although I was not very clear on how many.
Feeling under pressure, some practitioners came up with ways to give them out quickly, some criticized the methods, and some just complained about it. Hearing all of this, I felt I was at fault. I didn't take into consideration how much the local practitioners were able to handle. I simply wanted to make more DVD's thinking the more we made the more people we could save. I didn't take into account that all of the variables had to work together for the plan to work.
I was also under a tremendous amount of pressure. Some of the pressure came from the problem itself, and some came from other practitioners. I felt that some of the practitioners were criticizing and blaming me. I felt wronged. To save more sentient beings, I worked very hard to produce these DVD's, yet the local practitioners were not taking it seriously. I also blamed these practitioners for having a wrong attitude toward Shen Yun. I thought we should only be worried about not having produced enough DVD's. Instead we were only concerned about how to distribute what we had.
I couldn't understand why it mattered which year's performance we made the DVD's from or how much work there would be when we made extra DVD's to distribute. I kept on looking outward and at the same time my knowing side knew the pressure was caused by my own karma. It was a test to see if I would be moved. My human side took ahold of me. I did not want to be affected and I wanted to protect myself so I wouldn't get hurt. My human notions and my divine thoughts were in a battle.
In the end, the divine thinking won out. After thinking about it with a clear mind, I knew the Fa and our one body come first.
I had the best of intentions in what I did, then why was there still interference? It didn't matter whether I was right or wrong, I needed to look inward whenever I encountered a conflict. What human notion had stopped the project from progressing in the way I had imagined? After exchanging ideas and sharing with other practitioners, I realized it was caused by my notion of imposing things on others. Whenever I came to an understanding of something, I would think that other practitioners should do the same. I wanted others to do things my way. This notion had manifested in every project that I have helped Master with in Fa-rectification, yet I never truly recognized it until then. This time I had become truly irritated and I finally realized how harmful and serious it was. I was given the opportunity to change my notion while working on a project as important as Shen Yun. If the other practitioner's attitudes toward me had not irritated me, I would not have changed. Master gave me the chance to upgrade myself. Words cannot express my appreciation to Master. After I got over being upset, the conflict between the local practitioners and me disappeared. All of the bad thoughts I was having were suddenly gone and it was like a dream that was suddenly forgotten. I had learned my lesson and from then on I considered others first when doing things.
Shen Yun can save sentient beings. No matter how many Shen Yun DVD's we have, every copy is precious and should be cherished. With the attitude that I should be responsible to the Fa and to sentient beings, and with powerful righteous thoughts and the belief that Shen Yun plays a huge role in saving sentient beings, I took several dozen Shen Yun DVD's to distribute at a nearby market. I was being responsible to the Fa and to sentient beings. I held righteous thought and believed that Shen Yun was playing a major role in saving sentient beings.
For every DVD I gave out, I explained the content of the performance, it's impact on the audience, and how spectacular it was. People were able to fully understand the value and effect of Shen Yun. After I had distributed only half of the DVD's I had taken with me, I found one of the copies lying on the ground. I quickly picked it up, wiped off the dirt, and cleaned it with my scarf. I saw that one corner of the outer plastic wrap was torn. I straightened it out, carefully wrapped it with a flier, and put it back in my purse. I was going to fix the corner once I got home so I could give it out again. I looked inward at the time and examined myself, yet didn't find any human notions. Perhaps it was because I had made too many copies in the first place. I corrected my thoughts right away.
Even if I didn't do a good job estimating the amount of DVD's to produce, the old forces were not allowed to exploit this gap and commit crimes against Dafa and cause people to lose the chance to be saved. No matter how many copies of Shen Yun DVD's were still left, I would not routinely pass them out. I would cherish every copy. After I eliminated all the interference, people were really happy to accept the Shen Yun DVD's. They expressed their appreciation as if they had just been given a great treasure. I distributed all of them within an hour.
As I was walking home, I saw a pedicab in front of me with two older women sitting in it. They were well dressed and had a little boy with them. A young woman was driving the pedicab. I caught up with them and greeted them,
“Hi, please wait. I want to show you something.” They were very surprised that I was talking to them so they stopped. I took out the DVD with the less than perfect packaging, smiled, and said,
“How are you doing? I have a precious present for you. It is a DVD of a performance by the world's top performing arts group. It showcases China's five thousand years of divine culture. The classic stories in history are told on stage through large-scale dance and music performances. The costumes are beautiful, the LCD backgrounds is beautiful, the colors are beautiful, and the dances are beautiful. There is a strong energy field when the dancers perform and it is superb. Whoever watches it will benefit from it. Children who watch it will become smart and inspired, especially if they are interested in music and art. Young people nowadays are faced with a lot of pressure from the ups and downs of the economy. If they watch this show, their situations will change and new opportunities will be presented to them. Good opportunities are waiting for them. Elderly people who watch it will feel great physically and mentally. Many of their illnesses will disappear, and their bodies will feel light.
“Shen Yun Performing Arts has three companies that tour around the world each year and perform at the top venues. The majority of the audience consists of people from main stream society and the upper class society. It has broken the barriers of language, ethnicity, and race and brought five thousand years of Chinese culture to the world. It also allows our Chinese people to see how wonderful our own culture is.”
They paid close attention to what I had to say and listened to me without interrupting. I continued, “This DVD was not supposed to be given to you. However, I noticed that you are very kind and you look very familiar to me. A great predestined relationship cannot be missed. If it was, I am afraid that you will not have the opportunity to see this show later. You cannot purchase this DVD no matter how much money you spend. I don't want you to miss this opportunity. Please, once you get home, fix this corner.” As I was speaking, I showed them the torn corner. One of them said right away, “That doesn't bother us. The corner is just a little torn.” I said, “This is a world class show and the packaging has to be perfect.” They said, “We will fix it then. Don't worry!” I said gratefully, “Thank you. Don't forget to share the DVD with your friends and family once you're done watching.”
They cherished the DVD and thanked me many times before they left reluctantly. As they drove away they continued to look back from time to time. I was so touched at that moment. I had never felt that way while distributing Shen Yun DVD's. I then began to cry. As long as we firmly believe in Master and firmly believe in Dafa, we can help to save sentient beings by introducing them to Shen Yun. A Shen Yun DVD with imperfect packaging became a precious gift. It was the most valuable copy I had ever given out. Everything depends on one's attitude.
A practitioner was willing to help distribute the rest of the DVD's with me during the following weeks. The problem of giving out all of the DVD's was solved. Through this experience, I was able to get rid of imposing my notions on others and started to look at the whole picture instead of focusing on one thing. In the process of continuously distributing Shen Yun DVD's, I experienced what Master said,
“We really do have some people who have done a great job, who have gone about things in a very natural and poised manner in upscale neighborhoods. And when they’ve spoken with people, they have been quite at ease. Instantly the other party has been delighted, just as if they’d been waiting for you.” (“Dafa Disciples Must Study the Fa - Fa Teaching Given at the 2011 Washington DC Metro Area Fa Conference”)
The process of distributing DVD's is so calm, natural, poised, and orderly. I have grown to like distributing Shen Yun DVD's more and more.
There are so many things I wanted to share that I could fill a book. Every opportunity I have is Master's meticulous arrangement and every upgrade happens because of Master's compassion, hints, and guidance. Every time I think about it, I am so touched that I cry. We can only pass the tests if we treat ourselves as practitioners.
Lastly, I would like to share Master's Fa to encourage myself and my fellow practitioners,
“Its broad and immense, profound inner meaning can only manifest itself to, and be experienced and understood by, practitioners who are at different levels of true cultivation.” (“Broad and Immense” from Essentials for Further Advancement)
The above is what I have enlightened to at my own level. I ask that my fellow practitioners please kindly point out anything that is not in line with the Fa.
Heshi.
