Minghui Fahui | Immersed In Buddha's Grace
(Minghui.org) Greetings, Master! Greetings, fellow practitioners!
I would like to report some of my experiences over the past 12 plus years of cultivation to Master and share with my fellow practitioners.
1. My Entire Family Obtained the Fa
My mother had always been ill since as early as I could remember. By 1990, my younger brother had started college and I had gotten married and become a mother. However my mother's health was still poor. Every day she either had to take medicine or get shots.
My younger brother had been interested in qigong since he was young. He especially wanted to learn a qigong practice so that he could cure my mother's illnesses. In 1994 he went to Jinan City for an internship and it just so happened that Master Li was giving Falun Gong lectures there. My brother heard that Falun Gong had miraculous effects in treating illnesses, so he immediately signed up for it. During the Chinese New Year break, he came back to teach my mother to practice Falun Gong. My older sister and I were both skeptical about it at first. We thought that what my brother said about the practice was too good to be true. But my mother's health started to get better soon after she began practicing. Thus I also picked up the book Falun Gong and started reading it. I felt that it was indeed a great book. It talked about Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance and taught people to be good.
I thought, “It is not too hard to be truthful and compassionate, but the forbearance part is too hard for me because I have a temper,” so I didn't want to learn it. Later, my mother's illnesses were completely cured, so I asked my husband to practice it. My husband had Hepatitis B before and could not do any kind of hard labor, and he had to frequently take medicine. After he practiced for about two months, he was able to go back to work and was no longer afraid of working the night shifts. After seeing all of these miracles, I finally believed in it and so did my sister. Our entire family began practicing Dafa!
At first I only knew to do the exercises whenever I had time. I didn't pay much attention to my xinxing. In fact, from when I heard about Dafa in 1994, through reading the book in 1996, I didn't truly start cultivation until 1998.
When I finally started cultivating in Dafa, I truly felt honored to be a Dafa disciple! Every day all I did besides work was study the Fa and do the exercises. Every morning at 4:00 a.m., my husband and I went to do the exercises with fellow practitioners in front of a middle school. After doing the exercises we cleaned up the space, went back home to eat, and then went to work. We were full of energy and very happy. Every Sunday we brought our son with us and went to rural areas to spread the Fa.
Besides doing the exercises, I also studied the Fa a lot and paid attention to cultivating my xinxing. I worked as a treasurer, and when others would sometimes mistakenly give me too much money, I always gave it back to them right away. I felt that these were very important aspects of things that I must do well. However, sometimes I didn't do well with the smaller things. One time I went to pick up my son from school. On our way home I saw one yuan lying there and I picked it up and put it in my pocket. My son asked me, “Mom, is that yours?” I said, “No, I just found it.” and I didn't think it was a big deal. That evening when I studied the Fa, Master said,
“Being so smart, he intends to pursue self-interest. 'Whoever bullies you, go to his teacher and find his parents.' 'Pick up money if you see it on the ground.' The child is taught this way. From childhood to adulthood, as he receives more things, he will gradually become increasingly selfish in ordinary human society.” (Zhuan Falun, Lecture 2)
I immediately realized that this talking about me. The next day I said to my son, “I made a mistake yesterday. You can turn in this yuan to your teacher!” He agreed. Another day he found two yuan in the yard. When he turned it in to the teacher, the teacher praised him. One time he was playing with a classmate, who accidentally hit him in the face. His face swelled up terribly. The teacher was very nervous and worried that we would come to school and cause a scene. My son said to the teacher, “Don't worry, my mother is a Falun Dafa practitioner and doesn't fight with others.” The classmate's mother called us and wanted to pay us, and visit with my son. My husband answered the phone and told the mother it wasn't a big deal, and that she didn't have to do that. My son's face recovered by the next day.
My neighbor saw my son's face when it was swollen and said, “You've really changed. If it were me, I wouldn't have dealt with it like that.”
2. Protect the Fa, Validate the Fa, Clarify the Facts, and Save Sentient Beings
On April 25, 1999, I went with fellow practitioners to Fuyou Street. It was about 2:00 or 3:00 p.m., and we were quietly waiting on the road outside of the appeals office. Suddenly there was a commotion in the crowd. Everyone was looking up at the sky and some said there were Falun there. I looked up, and indeed, the sun was sometimes red, sometimes green, and sometimes yellow. It was also rotating very fast. The scene was beautiful and magnificent. At the same time, I also saw a tall figure turning the sun. I thought that it must be Master! Tears filled my eyes and I sensed the difficult situation that Master was encountering. At the time I just knew that Master was spreading the Fa and I didn't yet understand Fa rectification. Gradually a sense of responsibility and of being on a mission grew within me. I told the practitioners next to me to not keep looking and that we should do well in what we were currently doing. I then quietly turned around and returned to my position at the front.
In the ensuing days, this sense of responsibility and of having a mission has always accompanied me on the path of assisting Master in Fa rectification. As I am writing this now, I realize that this sense comes from the vow I made with Master before coming down to the human world.
From April 25, 1999, to the spring of 2002, in order to seek justice for Dafa and Master, I went to Beijing to appeal five separate times. Two of the five times I was arrested, but with Master's help, both times I was able to get away. I also noticed that both times the people who arrested me seemed to be ordinary people instead of police. Later as I studied the Fa more and more, I understood that they were all people who did not know the facts, and for us to validate the Fa, we must let people know the facts. Especially after Master talked about the importance of studying the Fa, sending forth righteous thoughts, and clarifying the truth, we changed from going to Beijing to widely clarifying the facts.
At first we didn't have any truth clarification materials so we hand-wrote stickers and used carbon paper to make copies of truth clarification letters. At that time we had no fear at all. Almost every night we went out and put up stickers. Master also constantly encouraged us. I dreamed that the seeds I randomly threw on the ground instantly grew into lush plants. Later when we had printed materials, it became easier and handier to clarify the facts. We even heard feedback. One day my neighbor told me that her son, who was in middle school, found a flier near their home. After he read it, he said to her, “Mom, what Falun Gong is saying really does make sense.”
As the Fa rectification progressed, we began distributing the Nine Commentaries, telling people to quit the Chinese Communist Party (CCP), using paper currency with truth-clarification phrases stamped on them, and distributing Shen Yun DVDs. We once took 100 copies of the Nine Commentaries and some stickers to my husband's hometown in a rural area. The people there are simple, sincere, and kind. My husband's older sister saw that we brought so many things and was a little scared. I said to her with a smile, “We brought our friends the best things. They can save them. We are doing a good deed and we will be okay.” It only took us two hours to distribute them. When we returned, his sister was just starting to get worried, and was very happy to see us. But she also complained, saying, “You had so many books and didn't leave one for your sister-in-law so that she could also read it.” We smiled and said, “Next time.” That event had quite an impact in that area. My husband's sister later told us, “The big speaker in the village continued broadcasting for several days, saying that people needed to turn in the book and brochures and not believe superstitions. People also had many discussions and said that there was a group of Falun Gong practitioners that came.” She was very proud of us.
Master mentioned many times about the importance of studying the Fa and we also had a profound understanding of this. When we studied the Fa well, things went smoothly. If there was a period time that we were too busy doing things and did not study the Fa well, then we would encounter many difficulties. The same goes for sending righteous thoughts. Before we do anything we always send righteous thought to clear out the other dimensions. We continue to send righteous thoughts as we actually do things. Sometimes when we are putting up stickers, and the street lights are too bright, I just think, “I want to put this on that pole and it would be much better if the light was off” and immediately the light would turn off. Sometimes when I am just about to put out a brochure and someone is heading my way, I just think, “Don't come” and the person turns.
Since the time that the Shen Yun DVD became available, I always have some in my bag, and Master always brings predestined people to me. In the past I always thought that going on vacation was just for fun and was a waste of time. So during the past few years when the shop organized vacations, I never went. This time I heard we were going to a place near Beijing and I felt an urge to go there to send forth righteous thoughts, so I decided to go. Because I was just thinking about going there to send forth righteous thoughts, I didn't bring many DVDs with me. After I got to the mountain there, I realized that I didn't bring enough. I was reluctant to just give them away to people at random, so I tried to find those who were predestined. I went up to an elderly couple who were selling small things. I bought some items and talked with them for a bit. I asked them if they had a DVD player at home and they said yes. I said, “We must have a predestined relationship. I have a set of DVDs with a show for you, and the programs are very good.” They were very happy, and thanked me again and again. Even as I walked away, the lady was still shouting, “You are welcome to come again next time!” I was also very happy. I thought that this elderly couple must be very kind, and therefore they could obtain the Shen Yun DVD. I quietly wished that they would be saved.
When I realized that the picture of the evil Jiang could emit substances that are bad for people, I remembered that there was a billboard with Jiang's picture not far from where my parents lived. The billboard was about one floor tall. When my family went there for Chinese New Year, we saw that local practitioners had used black ink to smear the words below the picture. But the picture was too high to reach. The next morning we went there with two eggs and I sent forth righteous thoughts while my husband and my son each threw an egg at the picture. My son's egg hit right on Jiang's temple and the yellow yolk splattered all over the face. The next time I went back to my parents' place, I noticed that the board had been changed to something else.
3. An Unforgettable Lesson
As the process of Fa rectification has progressed, the evil factors have become less and less, and the environment has loosened up. As a result, our will to be diligent has weakened. Our compassionate Master timely published, “The Closer to the End, the More diligent You Should Be,” and I memorized it to inspire myself. However, I again became less diligent after a year or two. Although I was still doing the three things, it felt just like completing tasks. Sometimes I couldn’t finish reading Zhuan Falun even once in a month, and I was no longer faithful about sending righteous thoughts. I also became very passive about clarifying the truth. Sometimes I didn't want to accept materials that fellow practitioners brought me, and I would wait until my husband was free so that we could go out together to put up stickers or distribute other materials. After a while, I became very dependent on him. I also harbored attachments to comfort, lust, and material interests.
My husband got extremely busy at work and had no time to study the Fa or do the exercises. Master hinted at him in his dream. He had three roly-poly toys, and the one in the middle was the largest. He and I were holding the middle one and wouldn't let go. He told me about it and I enlightened that the three roly-poly toys were fame, gain, and sentimentality. Master hinted to us that we had all three attachments and we were especially holding onto the attachment to gains, and wouldn't let it go. Although I knew it in my heart, I didn't care very much. I felt that as long as we were still in Dafa, we were okay, and as for these attachments, we could just slowly get rid of them. Now that I think about it, that thought was very dirty. It was basically making a joke of Master's compassion! As a result, the old forces took advantage of me.
During that time my husband wanted to give up his job, because it was getting too tiring for him. But I thought that if even everyday people could handle it, why couldn't he? Now that I think about, I was truly blinded by gain and self interest! During the 2008 Olympics, he passed away due to what appeared to be illness. This led to a lot of negative impact on Dafa and created a lot of obstacles in clarifying the facts to our acquaintances. As I'm writing this, tears fill my eyes. I would like to advise fellow practitioners that we must respect Master and the Fa, listen to Master's words, and not slack off! We cannot let our mistakes end up causing eternal regrets!
After my husband passed away, compassionate Master probably worried that I could not bear the grief. At first Master was holding it for me and I didn't show too much emotion. Thus fellow practitioners and everyday people thought that I was “tough.” Only I knew what was going on. I also understood that my sentimentality must be eliminated one way or another in my cultivation. Indeed, as time passed my sentimentality toward my husband was gradually exposed.
One time I said to my son, “I think when the Fa rectifies the human world, we will meet your father again.” But my son said to me very seriously, “Then if your sentimentality comes out at that time, you probably won't be able to leave.” I was shocked and knew that Master was using his mouth to hint and tell me to eliminate this thought. Another time I dreamed that I was inside an underground tunnel looking for my husband, but there was nothing around. Suddenly an older woman walked inside and closed the door. She was wearing a yellowish brown cloth on her head and yellowish brown clothing. I felt that she was about to do something bad to me, and I immediately thought, “Mie!” (“Eliminate!”) Instantly the old woman disappeared and I woke up. I realized that my sentimentality toward my husband was still very strong. I asked myself, “Why are you like this? Why do you make Master worry about you again and again? He left and what did that make you lose? Isn't it just an everyday person's comfortable life? If you really want to cultivate, then these attachments will have to be given up sooner or later.” Master said in “Discarding Attachments” (Hong Yin Vol. II):
You may talk cultivation
But you have to discard the attachments
that you hold deep inside
What’s given up is not oneself
But instead the folly of delusion
I said to Master in my mind, “I will do well. Please don't worry.” I sat in the lotus position and cleaned out the sentimental factors as well as his images and information from my dimensions, layer by layer. I also said to him seriously, “Our predestined relationship in the human world has ended. Please don't let the Old Forces use it to interfere with me.” Later a fellow practitioner told me that he saw my husband in a dream where he was holding a whisk. His body was beaming white light and he walked from far to near. I knew it was compassionate Master seeing that my sentimentality was hard to eliminate and was trying to encourage me with it.
At that point I stood up again and became more diligent than before in studying the Fa, sending forth righteous, and clarifying the facts. I was also able to be consistent about doing the morning exercises. I looked younger and was always smiling. From my change, everyday people also saw how extraordinary Dafa is.
4. What Master Gives Us Is the Best
I have a very deep realization after all these years of cultivation. When our minds are fully on saving people, and when we are putting the highest priority on Dafa, Master will give us the best, and things better than we can ever imagine.
Around this time of the year in 2009, more than a dozen local practitioners were arrested, including fellow Practitioner A, who was put in a forced labor camp. Every time his family visited him, I followed them to send forth righteous thoughts in close proximity. One time after his family visited him, they told me that his condition wasn't very good and he eagerly wanted to get out. I was very worried and thought about what to do. I then thought about Master. In Zhuan Falun, Master talked about connecting his mind with four or five Taoists. So I sat on in the lotus position, put my hands together, and asked Master for help, “Please connect my mind with Practitioner A.” I then talked to Practitioner A in my mind, “As Dafa disciples, that is obviously not the place that we should be. However, wherever Dafa practitioners are, we cannot forget our mission – saving people! Becoming too eager to get out is also an attachment. Master told us in “Don't Be Sad” in Hong Yin Vol. II,
Imprisoned as you are,
don’t be sorrowful or sad
Carry on with righteous thoughts and actions,
and the Fa is with you
Calmly reflect on the attachments you have
Remove your human thoughts
and evil will naturally die out”
After his family visited him again, they said, “He seemed to be a lot more calm and also wanted an MP3 audio file.” I thanked Master and thought that he must want to study the Fa with the audio file. The third time the family went to visit, I was just preparing for the winter coal and my son was also home. His family brought over the audio files for him and asked us to send forth righteous thoughts. I told my son, “If the coal cart arrives, just tell them to leave the cart and wait for me to get back.” I then followed them to the labor camp. Master again showed us the power of righteous thoughts. Usually there was a glass between them when they visited, but we sent forth righteous thoughts so that they could talk face to face. Suddenly there was a power outage and the police had to let them talk to each other face to face. The family was able to give him the audio files without a hitch. The power was fine outside the visitors' room—the outage was only inside the visiting room. When I got home, I saw that the coal had already been delivered and neatly laid out in the yard. On the balcony were also several baskets of persimmons. My son said to me, “My aunt and cousin were here. They helped us to prepare the coal and picked the persimmons.” Master arranges things again and again. I quietly thanked Master.
Several years ago I met a female practitioner who had just been released from a labor camp. She told me that when she first got into the labor camp, she was very worried because her husband didn't do anything at home and she had to take care of everything. Now that she was in prison she didn't know what would happen at home. She had two daughters, one in college, and the other who had just finished her college entrance exam and filling out of applications. As she was memorizing the Fa every day, she was able to put down these attachments. With righteous belief in Master and the Fa, she didn't give in while facing the evil forces. After a year, when she got back home, she saw that her husband did a great job with their family business and her younger daughter also got into the college that she wished to go to. Things at home couldn't have been much better. She knew that Master had given her all of these things. She said to me, “We must cultivate ourselves well. Otherwise how could we face our ever-compassionate Master?”
5. Searching Within
Two years ago, business was very slow at the shop where I worked, I rarely had any interference when I studied the Fa. Every day in the shop I could almost finish reading the Minghui Weekly and recite Hong Yin several times or memorize some paragraphs of Zhuan Falun and I would feel very good at the end of each day.
One morning I finished cleaning the store and then sat down to recite Hong Yin to my cell phone. (I used the cell phone to record as I recited and then checked for errors with the book.) I thought, “This is great! I can work and study the Fa at the same time.” I studied the Fa for almost an entire day. Then I realized that I didn't sell a single thing the entire day. That was very rare. When customers came in, it was either that the shop didn't have what they wanted, or they didn't like what we had. Not only did I not sell anything, nothing sold in the other shop, either. The owner got very worried. After work, he had a meeting with all of us. Toward the end of meeting, it sounded like he was just criticizing me without saying my name. This really touched on my competitiveness and I could hardly bare it. I thought, “What does it have to do with me? I'm not your shop manager (we didn't have a shop manager), and I'm doing all of the work that a shop manager does, but I'm not paid like a shop manager. Because I'm a Dafa disciple, I'm not complaining about how much I get, and am just quietly doing all the work. Now you are complaining when nothing gets sold all day. Okay, from now on, I won't do anything extra and will just do what I should do.”
I went home in anger. I put a pot with some rice on top of the induction stove and turned up the heat. It was almost 6 o'clock, so I went into the bedroom to send forth righteous thoughts. My mind was still not calm afterward, and I felt that the bad substance was still there, so I put my legs back together and continued. I also searched within. As I thought about it again and again, I suddenly realized that it was the thought I had in the morning—zealotry—that led to the interference from demons. Also it was a very selfish thought and not compassionate at all. I was just happy that I could study the Fa but didn't think about anyone else. If we continued like that and lost money every day, how hard would it be on the owner? These were ordinary people after all, who were very attached to material gains. They had all learned the facts of the persecution and supported me in clarifying the facts. Sometimes they even helped me, which should bring them good fortune. How could they be taken advantage by the old forces and be economically persecuted?
After understanding this, my mind became clear again. Then I realized that the stove was still on and it had been more than half an hour. I hurried into the kitchen and saw that the rice had burned. I was a little frightened. That was so close! I knew that Master was hinting at me again. The next day, I worked even harder than before, and business improved. When the owner saw me, it was like nothing had happened. I said to myself, “Searching within is so wonderful!”
The above topics are some of my cultivation experiences from over the years. The fact that I could be here and cultivate for all these years is only because of Master's care, encouragement, and help. Without Dafa and without Master, I would not be here. I would like to thank our great and compassionate Master!
Heshi to Master! Thank you, fellow practitioners!