Minghui Fahui | Shedding Tears of Grief in the Secular World: Master's Saving Grace (Part 1)
(Minghui.org) Greetings to Compassionate and Remarkable Master! Greetings to fellow practitioners!
I would like to take this opportunity of the China Fahui to share my cultivation experiences.
1. Shedding Tears of Grief in the Secular World: Master's Saving Grace
Just 28 days after I was born, my mother took me to my grandmother and left home to take part in a campaign. During that movement, she suffered a great mental blow and became mentally incapacitated. She could not even recognize her family members.
During the Cultural Revolution, our family was forced to move to a small hut on a farm in the countryside. I contracted acute meningitis and my temperature rose to 40 degrees Celsius (104 degrees Fahrenheit). I was unconscious for seven days and nights, yet miraculously I survived without any aftereffects.
I enlisted in the army, and after leaving the military, became a public servant. My husband had an accident during an overseas business trip and passed away. My son was only eight years old at the time. I was overcome by extreme grief at the time, and nearly broke down mentally. My health deteriorated.
Taking Part in Master's Third Lecture in Guangzhou
In the 20th Century there was a qigong fad in China, and by the early 1990s, it had lasted for nearly 20 years.
By April 1993 Falun Gong had spread to Guangzhou, and Master came here to give public lectures. My husband's comrade attended the second Guangzhou lecture in October 1993. When the third lecture was scheduled to run in January 1994, he and his wife came to visit me at home and persuaded me to learn Falun Gong. I agreed to it immediately. That night they took me to buy tickets to the lecture.
Seeing Master for the First Time
I rushed to the lecture hall that night, as the second lecture was already in progress. Next to the main entrance, staff were selling copies of the book Zhuan Falun, and I bought one. I saw many practitioners queuing up to ask Master to sign their books, and I joined the queue. I watched Master from a short distance. Not only was his countenance rather compassionate, his complexion was very smooth and fine, even finer than a baby's skin. I could not see any pores at all, and his complexion was very rosy. At that time, Master mentioned that he was 43 years old, but he appeared to be only in his twenties. He looked very youthful.
Master's voice was penetrating. Every sentence he spoke touched my heart. Master spoke about the cultivation of the human body, from the simple to the profound, as well as Fa principles, such as the existence of matter in various dimensions, life, and the universe.
Master did not speak from a script when he lectured. He taught based on the ability of those present to comprehend. He paid attention to students' thoughts. Sometimes he abruptly stopped during the lecture to explain questions that came up in students' minds.
Master Cleansed My Body
I fell asleep after listening to the lecture for a while. No matter how loudly my husband's comrade called to me, I simply would not wake up. I was like that for two days. Usually I had trouble sleeping, and I suffered from depression, but that day I slept soundly.
On the fourth day I became very alert, and my illness as well all my pains had vanished. I had so much energy too. I said to my husband's comrade, “As Master said, one must endure hardship to eliminate karma. Don't drive to pick me up tomorrow. I would like to ride my bicycle.” I had not ridden the bicycle for a long time because I had endometriosis and a tumor in my fallopian tubes. I was now in good health, and I rode for 50 minutes to get to the lecture hall. My family was astonished and asked about this extraordinary qigong that had so quickly turned me into such a strong person.
Master Opened Practitioners' Celestial Eyes
Master talked about opening the celestial eye. He said he would help everyone present open their celestial eyes, and asked us to stretch out our hands and see if Falun was rotating in our palms. I didn't see anything then, but my palms felt very hot. I later saw a huge, transparent energy column extending to the roof of the building from Master's head. Initially I thought the staff had turned on a light, and I even ran downstairs to see, but it was not so. I asked other practitioners, and they said that my celestial eye had opened, and I had seen Master's energy column. Many practitioners saw Master's energy column.
On the last day, when Master finished his lecture, He said he would cleanse students' bodies. He asked everyone present to stand up and stomp their left foot first, followed by the right foot, then stomp both feet continuously. When I saw everyone stomping, a lot of black qi, sickness qi, as well as bad things such as spirit possession fell off of every person's body like rubbish. I also saw several of Master's Fashen around each student busily cleansing their bodies and installing all the cultivation mechanisms.
Master Has Given Practitioners So Much
After attending the lectures, my body was cleansed, and I recovered from all my illnesses. I was energetic and full of joy. I could not understand a lot of what Master taught in the lectures, but I thought Master was simply remarkable. Questions I had before, such as where did humans come from, what was the true purpose of life, and why was there so much hardship in the world, were answered by Master in the lectures. I felt as if my brain was bombarded by a mysterious energy, and I began to enlighten to certain things. I resolved to follow Master and be diligent in cultivation so that I could return to my true home.
I later heard several veteran practitioners mention that before Master gave public lectures, he would emit a lot of gong and large Faluns to clear the field. Master also sent out many small Faluns to cleanse practitioners' bodies. His Fashen did many things for practitioners. Master endured many hardships when he gave lectures throughout China. Usually he ate instant noodles.
Attending Master's Fourth Lecture in Guangzhou
Master held his fourth lecture in Guangzhou on July 19-27, 1994. This time my eight-year-old son was on summer holiday. I bought him a ticket as well, and we attended Master's lectures together. During the third lecture, Master taught the Fa in the form of qigong and told many Buddhist tales. It was different this time. Right at the start, Master talked about guiding people toward higher levels and that he was here to save people. He said that in previous lectures, Guangzhou students did not seem to understand what he taught, but later on he opened their minds, and now they could understand what he was saying.
It was summertime then, and there were many people in the lecture hall. It was very hot. When some students waved fans, Master asked them not to, saying that they would then feel a cool breeze. He also asked everyone to be quiet when they got up from their seats, and to be punctual for the lectures, otherwise it would affect others.
Master Cured My Mother's Heart Disease from a Remote Distance
During this lecture, again, Master cleansed everyone's bodies. He asked everyone to think of an illness and listen to his commands to stomp their feet and eliminate the illness. He said afterwards that veteran practitioners had gained an advantage. Because their bodies had been cleansed previously, they could think of a family member's sickness and he would treat them. I immediately thought of my mother's severe heart disease. Master asked, “Are you ready?” When students answered yes, in an instant, Master said, “It's done.”
When I returned home, I told my mother about the incident. She said that she did feel a strange sensation in her heart that night, as if a light had shone on it, and her heart felt very warm. Subsequently when my mother went to the hospital for a check up, she was told that she had truly recovered from her heart disease. She asked to join me in studying the Fa, and she later even took charge of an assistance center.
Master Strengthened My Son's Abilities
After attending the lecture for three or four days, Master asked students to write down their experiences. I wrote a long article because I had many things to share. During the break, I brought my son to the stage and walked up to Master. I said, “Master Li, I wrote a sharing. Could you please take a look?” My son handed the essay over, and Master touched his head, saying, “What a fine lad.”
Afterwards, I realized that Mater had given my son many things when he touched his head. My son used to be a slow learner, and was often ill. He later became very fit, and was also very good in his studies. He always came in first in class and was sent to a good secondary school. When he spoke about what he learned from studying the Fa, he displayed a deep understanding of the Fa. When I was sent to prison and persecuted for my belief, he lived alone and got into a good university. He also graduated as the top student in the university.
Thank You, Master!
When Master taught the exercise movements, He walked down from the stage and came to me to correct my movements. I don't know why, but I was very touched then and wanted to cry. That night, I saw Master's body in my dreams, very sacred and tall like a mountain. I saw that many Buddhas, Taos, and Gods had come to the Three Realms to save people. They argued nonstop everyday and even appeared to be trying to stop Master from coming to the human world. How would they know that Master was here to do even greater things?
Because I had just started to learn Dafa, I did not understand the significance of this dream. As I later progressed in cultivation, I then understood what a great predestined relationship I had with Master to be able to obtain the Fa and practice cultivation in this special period. What a great honor it was to become a Dafa disciple in the Fa rectification period and how great this responsibility is!
This period of time in which I met Master and obtained the Fa was the happiest time of my life.
2. Not Slacking Off and Truly Cultivating: Breaking Through Illusion and Walking Out of the Maze
Before I began cultivating in Falun Dafa, I regarded myself as a kind person. After my husband passed away, I treated my in-laws even better than when my husband was alive. I usually treated my friends very well, too. A female colleague of mine was expecting a baby. In the afternoon she had no place to rest, so I invited her home for a meal and an afternoon break. However, after I started cultivation, when I measured myself against Dafa's requirements for cultivators, I felt that I was very far from the mark. I had many attachments.
Eliminating the Competitive Mentality and Attachment to Vanity
My superior once suddenly reprimanded me for nearly an hour for no reason. I realized that this was a test for me. I could recall the principles that Master taught and knew I was attached to gaining the upper hand. It was time for me to eliminate this attachment, but at that time I was still very hurt. My tears fell.
Master said in “What is Forbearance (Ren)?” in Essentials for Further Advancement:
“Forbearance is the key to improving one’s xinxing. To endure with anger, grievance, or tears is the forbearance of an everyday person who is attached to his concerns. To endure completely without anger or grievance is the forbearance of a cultivator.”
On this occasion I forced myself to endure the injustice, but this was still quite far from the requirements of a cultivator. Yet compared to my xinxing in the past, this was a slight improvement.
Cultivation is a serious matter. Tests like this kept coming, however I managed every time to look within myself first and restrain my bad habits, eliminating my bad thoughts in the process. Thus, my xinxing indeed elevated tremendously. Subsequently, whenever I encountered criticism and unjust treatment, I was not moved and could let things go with a smile. I let everything take its natural course and stopped striving for personal gain. Miraculously, as my xinxing improved, my relationship with those around me naturally improved. My superior, the one who severely reprimanded me, was especially moved by the huge change he saw in me. He exclaimed, “Dafa is truly remarkable. It can change someone like you who was so stubborn. Why don't you give me the book to read, too?” Hence, she and her mother began to cultivate Dafa.
Eliminating Sentimentality and Developing Compassion
Before I started cultivation, I was a very sentimental person. When I was young I was very attached to my grandmother, and after she suddenly passed away, I was very sad for a long time. My husband died at a young age, and I cried until I passed out several times. For six months, I was so ill that I could not go to work. I later doted on my child. After I started cultivation, I knew that all these attachments that came from human sentiment should be eliminated.
Though I understood the Fa principles, it was difficult to let go of such sentiments. It was a heart-wrenching process. Once when I talked about my husband with family members, I again started to cry. My nine-year-old son said to me, “You were a wealthy merchant in your past life and took many wives. My father was your favorite wife in that life. When you left home to trade and did not come back for several years, she pined for you and became ill. She cried until she had no more tears left, and in the end, died of grief. She came back in this life to claim back the tears she shed for you.” I knew I should have let go of this attachment towards my husband a long time ago.
In order to let more people know about Dafa and thus be saved, I became an assistant. On weekends and public holidays, I often went to other regions to spread the Fa, leaving my son behind with a nanny. I was always very worried about him. That night while in meditation, I felt myself meditating on a tall mountain. Suddenly I heard my son laughing and opened my eyes to take a look. He was playing beside a pond at the foot of the mountain. I was very worried. Indeed, my son swayed and fell into the water. I was very anxious and wanted to jump down to rescue him. Just then, Master's Fashen saved my son and he was all right. When I came out of the ding state in meditation, I had many revelations.
Because I often left home to spread the Fa, I had hired a nanny to take care of my son. I taught Falun Dafa to every nanny I employed, and after they left, I gave them a tape player, Master's taped lectures, exercise tapes, and Zhuan Falun, as well as other Dafa books. I asked them to persevere in cultivation. Nearly every year, I had to get a new nanny, but it never bothered me. Every time I treated the nanny well.
3. Resisting the Persecution with Righteous Thoughts: True Gold Is Tempered
In six or seven years' time, Dafa spread rapidly in our district. Initially there were 10,000 people practicing, and this grew to several hundred thousand. There was a practice site in nearly every park and public area. In large parks, there were three to four practice sites. At large group exercises held on weekends, tens of thousands gathered together, and it was a spectacular sight.
Test Amidst Tribulation
Jiang Zemin initiated the persecution of Falun Gong in July 1999. State-controlled media spread lies about Falun Gong and created terror as well as hatred.
There was no response to the letters we wrote to the central and provincial leaders. Yet propaganda spread by the media continued to poison the minds of sentient beings. We felt the severity of the situation and hoped to explain things to the government in a peaceful manner. On the morning of July 21, practitioners in our local district voluntarily went to the provincial and municipal government offices to appeal for Dafa. Many practitioners went that day, approximately ten thousand of them, and the government was extremely nervous. Many police officers were mobilized to make arrests. Many were taken to police stations. However, because there were so many practitioners, some were put on a big bus, driven far away, and then released.
Upon returning to work, my superiors began watching me closely and exerting pressure on me to give up the practice. The next morning, the police arrested me and took me to the police station.
I was forced to watch shows defaming Master and Dafa at the police station. I told the police officers the facts about Dafa. As I spoke, white crystal flakes fell from the air conditioning in the conference room just like snowflakes. I said, “Look, it's snowing in June. I was wronged and you had better release me quickly.” The head of the bureau came and phoned my superior, who drove to the police station to bring me home.
Breaking Through 81 Days of Imprisonment with Righteous Thoughts
The next day while I was at work, the police arrested me again, and I was taken to a secret villa. They claimed that I was one of the leaders of Falun Gong and put me under residential surveillance. I was locked up on the second floor and watched by two female police officers. Downstairs, there were two male police officers and a nanny. They made me watch shows defaming Dafa and Master. They wanted me to report on all practitioners I knew and on details of certain activities. I told them we practiced cultivation in an open and upright manner, and all our activities were open to the public.
One day they brought a group of people from the TV station, claiming to be conducting an interview. I immediately became alert, as I knew that the regime was expert at fabricating news. I must not let them succeed in their evil scheme. I sat in the full lotus meditation position with my hands in heshi. Two police officers came to pull my legs apart, but somehow they could not move them, and in the end those from the TV station left in anger.
Later on, people from the Political and Legal Affairs Committee came. When they saw me, they said, “Look at how well we treated you, hiring someone to take care of you.” They censured me, “You are a Party member. Therefore you should be on the side of the government. For the sake of your future, it is better that you give up the practice.” I replied, “The Chinese Communist Party started many revolutions and persecuted the Chinese people, and not many of them had a good ending.” When they saw that nothing they said could change my mind, they left bitterly.
Consequently, they left me alone, and every day I could do the exercises and recite Dafa scriptures in the room. I could also go and help the young nanny with her chores, and we became good friends.
The head then sent away a female officer who had been watching me on a business trip. The female officer asked me to help take care of her child for several days. I agreed. When she returned to pick up her child, the child cried and refused to leave with her. She was very touched and said to me, “I know that those who practice Falun Gong are good people.”
I was released after October 1, which was regarded as a sensitive day. I was imprisoned for exactly 81 days. After my release, the young nanny went to my place, and I reminded her to firmly remember that all Dafa cultivators are good people.
Going to Beijing to Appeal and Returning Safely
I was a department head at work. When I was placed under residential surveillance, my job was passed on to my superior. Upon returning back to work, I was not given my former role. My former colleagues stopped talking to me. I was not too bothered by other people's attitude towards me and continued to study the Fa and do the exercises as usual.
Afterwards, a few practitioners came to me and said that some practitioners had gone to Beijing to appeal for Dafa. We discussed whether we should also go. I enlightened that although Master did not talk about going anywhere to validate the Fa, Beijing was the center of the evil forces, so going there to validate the Fa and protest the persecution was only natural.
That night I had a dream. I saw many Dafa practitioners sitting in the car. I asked them, “Where are you all going?” They replied, “To the capital city, of course!” I asked, “Why are you going there?” They answered, “To validate the Fa!” I said, “I heard that the journey there is very difficult, the evil is arresting people.” They said, “There is nothing to be afraid of. The evil is not strong and can be crushed by Master's tiny finger. Righteous thoughts can suppress the evil. We will return safely!”
In late May 2000, seven to eight of us went to Beijing together. On the way, no one had any fear, and we were not stopped. We arrived in Beijing in the middle of the night and successfully met with a local practitioner. She said there was very strange thing that night--there was a bright rainbow in the sky.
The next day, several practitioners from our local district met with several practitioners from other areas. There were twenty of us altogether. We split into groups of two and went to Tiananmen Square to display banners. There were many people in Tiananmen Square that day. We unfurled our banners and shouted in unison, “Falun Dafa is good!” and “Falun Dafa is the righteous way!” By the time the police cars arrived at the scene, we had been shouting for some time. Many people gathered around and watched us. We held hands together, and the police had to pull for a long time before they could pull us into the police car. In the car, everyone continued to shout in unison until we reached the Tiananmen Square Police Department.
At the station, the prison cells were full of detained practitioners from all over the country who had come to Beijing to display banners. The police ordered several male practitioners into their rooms to interrogate them. We heard the screams of fellow practitioners and knew the police were beating them.
I was asked to fill out a form and told that if I did, they would inform my employer to send someone to take me back. I said, “I don't want to implicate anyone, so I will not fill out the form. We came here to express our personal wishes, and we have not done anything to violate the law. You should release us.” They ignored me and handcuffed my hands behind my back. A police officer hit me in the face with a huge club. Another kicked me. I saw stars, and my head was spinning. I shouted, “The police are hitting me! It is illegal to hit people!” They truly stopped beating me, and I told them, “As a police officer, how could you simply hit an unarmed, non-threatening civilian!” They removed my handcuffs, and I could see the bones on my wrists where the cuffs had cut into my flesh. My entire face had swollen beyond recognition. My legs were covered in bruises, but it did not hurt much. I knew that Master's Fashen had suffered the pain for me.
Many practitioners were brought into the police department each day, and many representatives from different regional offices came daily to identify practitioners from their areas and escort them home. Yet no one could identify where we were from. We had been on a hunger strike for three days already. Everyone did the exercises and recited the Fa in the prison cells. On the evening of June 4, the head of the department arrived and asked to speak to a representative from our group. A police officer pointed at me and ordered me to step out. Other practitioners thought I would be beaten, so they surrounded me, holding hands. Two police officers dived at me like wolves, grabbed my hair, and dragged me outside. Because I had not eaten for three days, I was very weak and was on the verge of fainting. Just then, I thought of Master, and with all my might, I shouted, “Master!” My voice was very loud, and everyone present was stunned. The officer instantly let me go. The head walked over and said to me, “All of you have made enough troubles. We will release everyone. Go home and don't come to Tiananmen again.”
We were free! We came with joy in our hearts and returned safely. I went to my parent's place to stay for a few days. I did the exercises and recuperated from my injuries. I returned to work after my ten days of leave.
Yet, this time when I returned to work, I was subjected to a series of administrative punishments, one after another. I was removed from my position and demoted to the bottom level.
(To be continued)