(Minghui.org) I used to be opinionated, thinking that I knew a lot because I earned a bachelor's degree and held a stable job as a teacher. I am the youngest in my family and grew up in an environment where everyone catered to me.
My husband was diagnosed with having meningitis when he was young, which resulted in memory loss, slow response time and severe epilepsy. He never made it beyond getting a middle school diploma. Before I started cultivation, I felt that I was better than him, and it bothered me that he was extremely honest and inflexible. I didn't think he could accomplish much. Therefore, I became the head of the household and made decisions on all family issues. My husband was rather henpecked and had to follow my lead at all times. I often criticized him if I didn't like what he was doing.
My husband was quiet and never argued back, which truly annoyed me. Because we never argued, thanks to my husband's self-restraint and quietness, it helped me vent my dissatisfaction, have a target to argue with and then calm down. I always felt out of sorts. Furthermore, the workload at school where I taught often tired me out. I felt that I led a miserable life and kept blaming others.
Cultivating and Giving Up Bad Traits
After I began cultivating in Dafa, I understood that people's relationships were predestined and affected by the principle of karmic retribution. Being husband and wife in this life means that he and I had a predestined relationship. I should cherish it. Besides, Teacher told us to look within and to look for the strengths of others. I am Teacher's disciple. I am cultivating Dafa and Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance. Why should I look down on my husband? I finally realized that although he isn't that intelligent and capable, he has been very patient, honest, and willing to sacrifice. He isn't out for gain and prestige.
When his colleagues took a day off, he always covered for them. Even on his day off he would go in to work during peak demand and never asked to be compensated. He was well liked by his boss and colleagues. At home, he was always helpful and took on a lot of the housework. He was very kind and tolerant toward others. When I made a mistake and felt upset, he would always comfort me. His generosity moved me many times. Sometimes, when he took a lot of effort to do something, but did not meet my expectation, I would chastise him. But he never argued back, nor would he get annoyed. His tolerance often moved me, and also made me ashamed of myself. I felt that I hadn't cultivated as well as I should. I wanted to change, cultivate well, so I could demonstrate the greatness of Falun Dafa!
Therefore, I looked inward and cultivated according to the requirements of Falun Dafa. I let go of my selfishness and the thought of being better than my husband. I started to treat him nicely, respect him, and involved him when making a decision. I became comfortable with what he did. Even if it did not meet my expectation, I could look at things from his angle and then make up the deficiencies without saying a word. He helped me see my gaps and I tried to eliminate them. Gradually, my attachments of being impatient and irritable were gone. I rarely complained. And I no longer held hatred and the feeling of being unfairly treated. Instead, I felt peaceful. Benevolence filled my heart. I tried to follow Dafa's standards and Teacher's teachings, to gain the traits that a lady should have, such as being gentle, humble, restrained, and virtuous. As a result, my husband and I treated each other courteously and we lived a harmonic life.
Benefits from Cultivating Diligently
Amazingly, after I had changed myself fundamentally and cultivated myself according to Dafa's standards, my husband suddenly changed, too. He used to be an introvert and quiet, but now he is turning into the opposite. He used to say only a few words at home, but now he smiles and keeps talking when he gets home. And suddenly he seems more intelligent than I remembered. From a person with low self-esteem and lacking assertiveness, he has become confident and decisive. From a person who couldn't decide what light bulb to buy, he can now take care of major things. At his work, he was promoted to manager and has been rated as a top performer every year. Also, what is even more amazing is that he no longer has epileptic episodes.
Cultivating in Falun Dafa has helped me find the demeanor and traits of a lady. When I was no longer a domineering person, my husband regained his manly demeanor.
We truly see the wonderfulness, sacredness, and superiority that Falun Dafa and Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance have given us. The happiness and fortune we feel from being under Teacher's boundless mercy is unparalleled.
Practitioners of Dafa are cultivators walking on the divine path. When our xingxing meets Dafa's standards at our level, Dafa's supernormal manifestations show themselves to us and we elevate ourselves.
