(Clearwisdom.net) I was lonely since childhood. When I was little, nobody cared about me. My clothes were always dirty, and I was always hungry. In winter, my hands were cracked due to the cold. Other children all looked down on me. My mother didn’t take care of me. Since the age of six, I thought life was boring and thought of death. This despair traveled with me like a shadow. I had few friends to share my innermost thoughts and feelings with. Besides loneliness, the only things that occupied my growing up were reading books and listening to radio programs.
What should I do with my life? I had been searching for 30 years, until one day I happened to read the precious book Zhuan Falun. I felt that some extraordinary, enormous power from the book cleansed me, letting me gradually become peaceful and benevolent. As I read the book again and again, the iceberg in my heart, which was an accumulation of resentment, sadness, and confusion, was unconsciously dissolved. Very often I was immersed in the book’s energy field of immense compassion. Through studying Zhuan Falun, I came to understand why and how I should live. I often had my face covered in tears, sighing with emotion that there could be such great meaning to life!
I began practicing Falun Dafa in 1998. Because of my deplorable childhood, I was very weak and suffered from anemia and palpitations. After my baby was born, my health became even worse. My cheeks were covered with a butterfly rash, and my face was full of black spots. I had a dull, yellowish complexion. I couldn’t even lift a five-pound-weight. After practicing Falun Dafa for half a year, however, the butterfly rash disappeared, and my face had a healthy glow. All the black spots faded without my realizing it. Everyone was amazed at the changes in me. Since then, I have never experienced palpitations. I fully recovered in just a year.
In November 2002 I was illegally arrested and taken to a detention center. Many practitioners were forcibly taken into custody during this time. When I was taken to the No. 9 ward, I saw two practitioners sending forth righteous thoughts. I joined them, and then I clarified the facts about Falun Dafa and did the exercises with no fear. Some inmates talked with me and asked me about their confusions. I then told them how to distinguish what was genuinely good and what was truly bad by the standards of the Fa. All of them exclaimed, “Ah, it is truly this!” Within 20 days, two thirds of the inmates had begun to learn the Falun Dafa teachings and exercises with me. Seeing the situation, the police officials and guards hurriedly transferred me to another ward. But the same thing happened again in the new ward.
In January, 2003 I was taken to Baimalong Forced Labor Camp in Zhuzhou City, Hunan Province. It was wintertime. The guards forced me to sit still on a small stool from 6:00 a.m. until 10:30 p.m. for 26 days. Except for going to the restroom at regular times, I couldn’t stand up even at mealtime. In order to pressure me to give up my belief in Falun Dafa, the officers and collaborators used all kinds of methods to persecute me. However, I never wavered.
After I went on a hunger strike, a tall, strong police officer tried to pry open my mouth with a steel spoon. She pounded the spoon around inside my mouth, injuring my gums and lips. At that moment, I mentally said to Master, “Master, no matter how evil it is, as your disciple I will never recognize the evils’ arrangement, nor will I fear.” Whenever I thought of Master, I couldn’t help crying. But immediately I said to myself, “Would a divine being cry at this moment? No! Divine beings are purely righteous and selfless and have immense mercy.” Thinking this, I felt myself at once become extraordinary and full of compassion. I looked at the officer kindly, feeling pity for her. Without any resentment in my heart, I peacefully and compassionately told her and the other officers the facts about Falun Dafa. Later I felt a soft wheel rotating inside my mouth. From time to time, it rotated clockwise or counter-clockwise on my tongue and under my jaw. I knew it was Master curing my wounds.
Before I was released, I wrote the following to the officers and guards: “Whatever unfair and irrational persecution I suffered here, I always maintained my righteousness, compassion, and pure harmony. This makes me feel proud of myself when I look back on my experience here.”
