(Clearwisdom.net) I began practicing Falun Gong in 1996 when I was in elementary school and did the exercises with my parents everyday. When the Chinese Communist Party (CCP) began the persecution of Falun Gong in 1999, our family life was shattered. My parents were imprisoned in 2002 and I was on my own at home. I began to slack off in my practice, indulging myself in ordinary society, and I did many bad things. It was not until September 2010 that I started to practice again. With the help of fellow practitioners I managed to return to the Fa.

I used to be an irritable person. Whether at home or not, I only liked to tell others what to do. I threw tantrums over minor things and often broke things in a fit of temper. When I was at odds with my husband, I would make a fuss until I got my own way. I knew I had a bad temper, but could not control myself when something happened that made me unhappy. It was when my husband was very close to divorcing me that I thought of Falun Gong again. I knew my husband would divorce me sooner or later and my life would be ruined if I continued to act this way. After I had this thought, a fellow practitioner stopped by our home and we studied the Fa together. When I experienced tribulations, she sent forth righteous thoughts for me and reminded me to improve my xinxing. I gradually learned to look inward to find the root cause of my problems.

My colleagues went out to eat one day, and I joined them. My husband was away on business that day and phoned me when I was at the restaurant. I did not answer the call because I could not hear it ringing. When I went home to study the Fa with fellow practitioners, he called me again and started to shout at me for not having answered his call earlier. I tried to explain, but he simply refused to listen. If this had happened before, I would have shouted back at him. But this time I exercised self-restraint and did not fight back over the telephone. Fellow practitioners reminded me how a practitioner should behave, so although I felt wronged, I was able to restrain my anger. The next morning I tried to figure out why this episode had happened. I understood that it was because of my failure to remove my aggressiveness and bad temper, and thought that it was a test to see if I had enough forbearance. I said to myself: “I must pass this test. Tolerance with grievance in my heart is not real tolerance. I will forbear this with a peaceful mind and I will be grateful to him for having created such a good opportunity for me to improve my xinxing.” I decided to call him back and reminded myself not to become angry, no matter how badly he might treat me. Surprisingly, he was quite pleasant and seemed happy that I called. I suddenly came to understand that all those tribulations were illusions. They would be eliminated when I measured myself in accordance with the Fa and improved my xinxing by looking inward. The bitter quarreling between us stopped. Seeing the changes in my behavior, my husband was very grateful to Teacher and Dafa and began to practice Falun Gong with me.

I work for a car sales company and my income is commission-based. I always had conflicts with a particular male colleague because we competed for the same customers. In every conflict I refused to make any concessions to him. When my manager criticized me for my bad temper, I stormed back at him, making quite a name for myself as a dreadful employee. When I started to practice, I found my strong attachment to personal gain. How could I be considered a practitioner if I could not remove such attachments?

I later went through a series of xinxing tests. These started when my colleague succeeded in taking one of my customers away from me. I was in a very bad frame of mind and quarreled with him furiously. We went to the manager's office to ask who should be credited with the sale. The manager said, “You sold the car, so the commission should be yours. But, as punishment for your bad behavior in handling this matter, I have decided to withhold your commission for this sale.” I was very upset when I got home and thought, “I am a practitioner, but I fought with everyday people.”

When my next cultivation test came up, it was exactly the same situation with the same person. I knew that I must handle myself as a practitioner this time. However, I simply could not tolerate it. My mind was in a turmoil, as if two forces were clashing with each other. One part of me said, “It's yours, so take it. Why let him bully you? Just go fight for it.” Another side of me responded, “You're a practitioner. You must follow the standard of a practitioner.” After careful consideration, I said to my colleague, “The sale is yours if you want it.” On the surface I had let it go, but when I got home I sobbed my heart out. Although I had let go of my attachment to fighting with others, but I still had not let go of grievance. Teacher said:

“Forbearance is the key to improving one’s xinxing. To endure with anger, grievance, or tears is the forbearance of an everyday person who is attached to his concerns. To endure completely without anger or grievance is the forbearance of a cultivator. ”(“What is Forbearance (Ren)?” from Essentials for Further Advancement)

When my test came for the third time, I conducted myself like a genuine practitioner and set a high standard for myself – to tolerate the whole thing with a peaceful mind. I did not argue and let things happen naturally. The following day I performed extremely well and, amazingly, sold six cars! This experience made me realize that all tribulations are actually illusions and the only thing we need to do is to let go of our attachments.

My colleagues knew that I practiced Falun Gong and thought that the practice was good when they saw how my attitude changed. It did not take much effort to explain the facts about Falun Gong to them and ask them to quit the CCP and its affiliated organizations. The person who was always at odds with me before, became very friendly towards me and was always willing to help me. We now get along very well.

Fellow practitioners have helped me a lot when I encountered xinxing tests. Their encouragement and reminders on the Fa principles were invaluable, but I was rather incredulous when they talked about the miracles that they experienced in their cultivation. One evening I recited a Dafa article with some practitioners. When they left I went to bed, with my child speaking to me beside my bed. As I lay there I felt my body was levitating. I was a little afraid and didn't dare to breathe. I drifted from my bed to outside the room. I could sense that my body was passing through the wall and other objects. It was magnificent! I then went to another dimension and was surprised to see human beings and vehicles on another planet. After a long time I came back and opened my eyes, only to find that my child was still there talking to me. I realized that it was a hint from Teacher to strengthen my resolve in cultivation. Teacher does not want to lose a single practitioner, so I must enlighten to the hints and not let Him down.

These are my personal understandings. Please point out anything inappropriate.