Master Is Leading Me on the Path to Godhood (Part 2 of 2)
Opposing the Old Forces’ Arrangement
While distributing pamphlets inside a building one evening, I fell down the stairs. I immediately thought, “I am here to save people. No evil is allowed to persecute me.” I tried to stand up, but it hurt too much to walk. After asking Master for help, I tried again and was able to slowly walk home. As I sent forth righteous thoughts at midnight, my feet were already severely swollen and looked like big loaves of bread. I got out of bed, but was it was too painful to stand. I thought perhaps I should just stay in bed for several days and study the Fa. Then I realized that if I acknowledged the injury, wouldn't I be following the old forces' arrangement? I still needed to do things as I had planned, so I got out of bed, slowly edged towards the door, and put on one shoe. I then said to the other shoe, “Please work with me so that I can go out today and save people.” After several tries, I was able to put it on. I then asked for Master's help so that I could walk. When I slowly walked downstairs, my neighbors asked me what had happened and I explained. That day, I took a taxi and helped more than 30 people quit the CCP and its affiliated organizations after I clarified the truth to them. In the following two weeks, I kept doing the three things as though I wasn't injured. In fact, the results of my truth-clarification efforts during that period of time were the best I'd ever experienced. A month later, my feet were totally back to normal. I told my neighbors that my quick recovery was due to my practicing Falun Dafa. Amazed by what they witnessed, most of them agreed to quit the CCP.
Every time I travel by train or plane, I take a large bag of truth-clarification materials with me. When I flew home during the Olympic Games, I had an MP3 player with electronic Dafa books in my carry-on bag. At the security check, the girl in front of me had to take everything out of her handbag for inspection. When it was my turn, I put the bag on the belt and sent forth righteous thoughts. The security officer pushed my bag forward and said to the young man behind me, “Next.” I was grateful for Master's help. I realized that, when we maintain righteous thoughts and act righteously, everything will be fine.
Let Go of Attachments to Self-Interest and Fame
Practitioners helped me a lot after I moved. I walked to many places, from the police department to the government officials residential area, telling people the facts about Falun Dafa. Master told us to study the Fa more and look within. Although I studied the Fa every day, while reading I always thought about where to distribute materials the next day. Thus I was not able to completely focus and immerse myself in the Fa. In “Dafa Disciples Must Study the Fa,” Master said:
“When some people read Zhuan Falun they are not concentrating, but rather, thinking about other things, and not able to focus their attention on cultivation. It thus amounts to wasting time. And not just wasting time—instead of it being the time when they are to be elevating, they are using their minds to think over issues and things that they shouldn’t concern themselves with, and thus, not only aren’t they elevating, but on the contrary, they are often dropping in level. If you don’t study the Fa well, there are many things you will not be able to do well.”
After we left our old house, my husband's younger brother occupied it. Thinking that as a practitioner I should focus on doing the three things, I wished to give up the attachment. However, I could not calm my heart even when I studied the Fa. One day, after I rationally thought it over, I was able to let it go. When doing the sitting meditation that evening, I felt very light, as if I was sitting high up in the air.
After I was able to let go of material interests, the attachment to sentimentality began interfering. My daughter got a divorce. Because I had raised my grandson and he was a young practitioner, I refused to give him to his father. One day, my son-in-law and his mother came to see my grandson, and I agreed to let them take him for a visit. The next day, my son-in-law called me, saying he had taken my grandson to his old hometown. I was angry, got on a bus, and went to his workplace. In the lobby, I told people the bad deeds he had done. After returning home, however, I was filled with regret. In Zhuan Falun, Master said, “If you compete and fight like an ordinary person, you are an ordinary person. If you outdo him, you are even worse than that ordinary person.” Two months later, we received the judgment that my grandson as well as the property belonged to my son-in-law. He had bribed the judge and defamed Dafa in order to win his case.
I read the judgment and noticed several things were incorrect, so I appealed the case. I also wanted to take the opportunity to clarify the truth and send forth righteous thoughts. When I visited the law firms, I distributed many truth-clarification brochures. Nonetheless, I still had an attachment of sentimentality towards my grandson. Master thus gave me a hint in a dream. I realized that my grandson did not belong to me. After letting go of the attachment of sentimentality, I felt relieved.
Last year, I found out where my grandson was staying and decided to go there and save people. So I went there with a bag of DVDs. My son-in-law heard that I was coming and took my grandson elsewhere. I was not moved and stayed in a hotel overnight. I clarified the truth to the hotel staff and they agreed to quit the CCP as well as its affiliated organizations. I also went to the nearby residential area and distributed DVDs. I went to visit my grandson again earlier this year. I had compassion in my heart and tried to care for my son-in-law the same way I had in the past. His attitude had changed and he allowed my grandson to stay with me for one evening. That evening, I went out shopping with my grandson, clarified the truth to cashiers, and gave them DVDs. When my grandson asked me what I was doing, I helped him remember the days when we went out together to distribute materials. He remembered Master's lectures and he was thus connected with Dafa again.
While doing the three things, I also tried to study the Fa more and assimilate myself to the Fa. Master said,
“He was also constantly improving himself during the forty-nine years of his Dharma teaching. Whenever he upgraded himself to a higher level, he looked back and realized that the Dharma he just taught was all wrong. When he made progress again, he discovered that the Dharma he just taught was wrong again. After he made further progress, he realized again that the Dharma he just taught was wrong.” (Zhuan Falun)
I realized that my attachments manifest differently at different levels. The higher our level, the higher the requirements we have to meet. This March, I encountered another kind of interference. My child stopped giving me an allowance. I was upset about it and did not realize it was related to financial persecution by the old forces.
Through discussion with other practitioners, I identified many of my attachments. One elderly practitioner asked me to help her by studying the Fa with her. We agreed to meet at my place on Mondays and Wednesdays. However, she did not come on Monday or Wednesday. When I asked her, she said she overslept on Monday and forgot about it on Wednesday, so I suggested that we meet at her place on Saturday. I went there on Saturday and rang the doorbell for a long time, but nobody opened the door. When I asked her several days later about this, she asked me to look inward. I was very upset and did not want to study the Fa with her anymore. That day, I went to a military residential area to distribute the Nine Commentaries on the Communist Party. Someone reported me to the police and I was taken to the police station. I did not yield and Master also helped me. My blood pressure turned out to be 220 and I returned home the same day. After returning home, I began to study the Fa more and sent strong righteous thoughts. I also shared understandings with other practitioners and found many of my attachments, including a show-off mentality, competitiveness, etc. Soon after, my grandson saw many Udumbara flowers in our yard. Encouraged by this, my daughter began to do the exercises with him. After returning home, I saw many Udumbara flowers as well. I knew Master was encouraging me.
The truth is, I have not done well in my cultivation and Master has been helping me every step of the way. In “Dafa Disciples Must Study the Fa,” Master said:
“Those who were originally meant to have been saved last year [by Shen Yun, but didn’t go], have lost the opportunity forever. That’s because Fa-rectification is unceasingly forging ahead, step by step, and when it arrives at one cosmic plane it is time for that level of people; when it reaches a certain heavenly kingdom above, or a certain layer of cosmic body, it is time for that group of people to come see [the show], and next time around [when Shen Yun performs], that seat will belong to someone else.”
I know I need to do better.
Here, I want to conclude this article with words from Master so that we can all do the three things well:
“There is one point that you’re all very clear on: history’s being able to progress to this day, here in this world, is precisely because it was reserved for Dafa disciples to save sentient beings, as this chapter of history exists expressly for Dafa disciples’ success and so that you may fulfill your vows. Of course, it’s not solely about your pledges and fulfilling your vows. It’s also tied to the Fa-rectification and the fate of the immeasurable lives of this cosmos—something that huge. If you can do a good job with what you are supposed to do, everything in the Three Realms will go well and the interference that Master faces in the process of rectifying the Fa will be less.” (“Be More Diligent”)