Eliminating The Attachment Of Validating Myself
(Clearwisdom.net) The attachment of validating oneself encompasses the mentality of showing off, the attachment of zealotry, and jealousy. These attachments are not part of our true selves. They are notions formed to satisfy our selfish desires and sensations. When we have these attachments, we often forget that "cultivation depends on one's own efforts while the transformation of gong is done by the master." (Zhuan Falun, 3rd Translation Edition) Thus we might miss the opportunity to cultivate ourselves and save sentient beings, or we could insist on doing what we want to do and not coordinate with others. These attachments may cause us to become complacent and insincere. The attachment of validating oneself is truly harmful. Dafa practitioners must eliminate this attachment in order to validate the Fa.
The attachment of validating myself has arisen many times for me. However, understanding Fa principles helped me rectify myself and eliminate the attachment.
As I was writing this article, I missed the time for sending forth righteous thoughts. I quickly sat down and began to send righteous thoughts, but my human thoughts kept interfering. I straightened my thoughts in the following manner, "Isn't 'sending righteous thoughts' the responsibility of all practitioners? Then I should do it whole-heartedly and not let the thought of writing my sharing article get in the way. If I lose control and let that happen, then I am not in the state of 'The Mind and Body Join Together.' (Falun Gong, Chapter IV, 5th Translation Edition) When my body is controlled by the attachment to my self, then it seeks to validate the self and neglect the one body. I acknowledge that this not done by my main consciousness. I must eliminate this attachment in order to write the article from the side that is truly cultivating." After adjusting my thoughts, I was able to have strong selfless righteous thoughts.
A while ago, I completed a project that exposed the persecution in my local area. With Teacher's help, practitioners were able to find material that was hard to collect. During the production process, I was very involved and felt that my wisdom was growing. Practitioners pointed out that I had certain attachments from making the project, but I did not pay attention.
I handed the project to another practitioner for production and distribution as soon as I completed my task. I sent an email to the practitioner but he took his time to handle it. I thought that the project would be effective in exposing the persecution and saving sentient beings, thus, it should be distributed promptly. However, it had to be reviewed by the practitioner. I was not very thoughtful and sent another email. He replied, "I've been very busy lately and have not studied the Fa as much. I seem to be lagging in every aspect." I calmed myself down and looked inward. I noticed the attachment of insisting to do things my way, and I was using the excuse of doing Dafa work to cover the attachment of validating myself. This attachment made me impatient.
My heart felt lighter when I recalled a passage from Teacher's lecture,
"Dafa disciples, in your cultivation in the ordinary human world you all have understood something clearly that's based on the Fa's principles, namely, not to be attached to the "gain and loss" of ordinary people. So when things related to validating the Fa are involved, there too you shouldn't insist on voicing "my ideas" or on having things done "my way." It's not like only then can you establish mighty virtue in the cosmos. If you've got a good idea, well, you came up with it, you're being responsible to the Fa, and it's not important whether your idea is adopted or whether your approach is used."
"It's not like Gods see that your idea worked and then they raise your level. Instead, they only raise your level when they see that your understanding of it has improved. This is a truth in the Righteous Fa." ("Teaching the Fa at the 2002 Fa Conference in Philadelphia, U.S.A.")
I replied to the practitioner, "I did not put myself in your shoes. Thank you for helping me discover my attachments. I'm ashamed, but I will cultivate better." Although my project was quickly distributed afterward, it was at first delayed for a few days because of my attachments.
The attachment of validating the self sometimes manifests as showing off, being pleased with one's achievements, and wanting approval and praise from others. In fact, a practitioner who has such mindset is acting like a clown. As I understand it, he lacks virtue and is looked down upon by the gods.
Everything that a practitioner possesses is arranged and given by Teacher and Dafa to assist Teacher with Fa-rectification and to save sentient beings. We cultivate away our humanness amidst validating the Fa. If we do not fulfill our duties effectively, we shall be held fully responsible.
Although I have not had computer training before, I can use a computer without much problem. Sometimes a solution emerges from my thought or another person accidentally shows up and teaches me how to do it. When my state of mind is not pure, then no matter how hard I try, I cannot find a solution. How can miracles occur when there is human attachment? "One's gong level is as high as one's Xinxing level, and this is an absolute truth." (Zhuan Falun, 3rd Translation Edition)
Once at a small sharing conference, a practitioner said, "I heard from a practitioner that you gave a great speech. Please share it with us." His words were like a blow to my head. Practitioners are like a mirror. If I did not have the mentality of showing off and the attachment of zealotry, then why would I hear those words? Those are warning signs. I shamefully told him my feelings and asked him not to praise me. Practitioners are cultivators, thus, "all the compliments he receives are tests." ("A Cultivator Is Naturally Part of It" from Essentials For Further Advancement) One can become complacent when one does not handle compliments well.
Whether one participates in a project that is technologically advanced or possesses a special skill, they are all arrangements within the Fa. We should not validate ourselves. Teacher has mentioned that practitioners who clarify the truth face to face are the greatest. I truly admire those who clarify the truth to others face to face. Compared to them, my attachments to fear, laziness, and indifference in saving sentient beings are all exposed, and are far from the standard set by Teacher. I will do better in this short amount of time that we have.
The above is my understanding about eliminating the attachment of validating myself. Please kindly point out any inappropriateness.
August 14, 2009