A Mother Writes to Her Son from Prison
My son, how are you doing?
Time flies. It's been seven years since I was taken away from you. You were a boy back then. Now you are a bright and sophisticated college student. I'm so glad! The electric net and the high wall separate me from you. I can only walk towards you in my dream, bringing you my firm belief in truth.
Each and every day in the past seven years, like any mom in the world, I thought about you. My best wishes have always been with you when you grew up! Even though I couldn't hold your hands to cultivate together with you, I knew Truth-Compassion-Forbearance, the truth of the cosmos, had taken deep root in your heart. When you were eight years old, your Mom was lucky enough to start practicing Falun Dafa. I took you with me to the group study every day. You read Zhuan Falun with us. At an experience sharing conference, you and a few other little practitioners went onstage to demonstrate the meditation exercise. You all looked very focused and solemn. I was so impressed that I remember it vividly even today. On your way home from school, you saw strings of colorful Falun following you. In your dream, a demon chased you. You ran to a Falun. The demon immediately disappeared. Teacher has been protecting us and paying debts that we owed to others in our past lives. That's why we weren able to overcome one tribulation after another and walk our paths of cultivation peacefully in those years.
One night when you were fifteen years old, we were suddenly awoken from our sleep. Policemen broke into our apartment and illegally searched our home and took me away. Since then, I haven't been back home. I was worried then about the hundreds of Falun Dafa books and DVDs of Teacher's lectures in our home. You were so clever that you took a few with you every day on your way to school and passed the precious materials on to fellow practitioners. You took a few each day until all of them were safely in the hands of other practitioners. This is a secret between us. Nobody else knew about this. In those days, our phone was tapped and the police monitored our home. The way that you cherish the Fa moved me to tears. There is no doubt that you are Teacher's little disciple. There is no doubt that you safeguard the Fa! As your mom, I want to say thank you! How could I not still be concerned about you? How could I try to find excuses not to firmly and righteously walk down the path of cultivation during this inhumane persecution?
Because of the persecution, you lost the warmth of our home and you had to mature early. My brave son! You didn't give in to the evil test imposed upon us. You even wrote to me often and came to visit and encourage me. I'm so thankful to you! I have suffered all kinds of torture here. It has been like hell on earth. In the most vicious environment, I came to see more clearly that the reason a person can survive in the most difficult situation is because he or she has a soul with a strong belief! Where did people come from? Where are they going? It is Falun Dafa that answered all my questions. And I found hope in my cultivation. Isn't it uplifting if we can let go of life and death when Dafa is being slandered and treated unfairly, and while the evil forces torture us and try to force us to give up our beliefs? So the suffering is not for naught! However, it would be devastating if a person lost his or her perseverance and belief.
In this brutal persecution, I came to understand more about life. Pushed to the extreme, I found I could still bear a little more. When I found it was hard to let go of something, I found I can give out more. My right to take care of my parents and my child were taken away. Nevertheless, my belief in the Fa has always been with me and nothing can disturb me any more.
What is it that makes life meaningful? What is it that makes us so magnificent? It is because Dafa is being spread. It is because we are assisting Teacher with Fa-rectification. It is because of our responsibility and mission of saving sentient beings. We were handcuffed. We were shackled. We were tied down to a tiger bench. It was so cold here and we were not allowed to sleep well. Bad people tried to brainwash us. However, with all of this physical torture and persecution of our mind and spirit, while we are being wronged, so many of us remained steadfast. We spread the truth about Dafa, about Truth-Compassion-Forbearance, to the people we encounter, and save people even while suffering tribulations ourselves.
Time can never change a Falun Dafa disciple's heart. We have our firm belief in the truth. Fa gave us wisdom and made us mature and tolerant. In the prison, we were pushed to our limit. However, Teacher strengthened us. In the past seven years, when I missed you so much, I'd recite what Teacher said in Zhuan Falun,
"Cultivation is something you do right in the thick of tribulations. They'll test whether you can sever your emotions and desires, and they'll see if you can take them lightly."
Once in my dream, I was out on an open field. I was holding your hand and running with others, trying to escape disaster. I picked you up and lifted you over my head. Suddenly, you turned into a white bird and flew to the sky. I looked up. Colorful clouds were all over the sky. I still see this scene vividly today. I came to realize that Teacher was encouraging me to let go of sentimentality. Our benevolent Teacher has made all the arrangements for us, yet I was attached to everyday sentimentality. How could I ascend with all my attachments?! Teacher has been watching me and protecting me and bearing suffering for me to help me break through the tribulations of life and death. During the years when I wasn't with you, I know there are always fellow practitioners taking care of you. Even when you went to another city, you met fellow practitioners that help you improve in the Fa.
Five years after I was taken away from you, you started to go to college, which meant you could start to visit me. In the visitation room, on the other side of the big glass window, I was eagerly looking for the little face that I was so familiar with. Yet, time has changed both of us. You are now grown up! You look so confident and righteous. I was so happy! You are no longer a little boy, but now a man. Your first words to me then were, "Mom, you have been so courageous!"
My son, you will enter mainstream society in one year. In the current society where people go after physical interests, you still need to be a good man even when it is hard to do so. Returning to your true self is the hope of a life. Dafa will help you find yourself in such a noisy world, which is the ultimate goal of a life. Do not get distracted by superficial prosperity. It is actually quite bitter. People's admiration won't send you to heaven. All the possessions won't put an end to reincarnation. All the relationships with family members will become history when the old cosmos is replaced by the new.
Let's be thankful. We are thankful that we got the opportunity to study the Fa. We are thankful for the time when Teacher is with us. We are thankful for Teacher's arrangements of making us parent and child. We are thankful that we have a chance to position ourselves well through practicing Dafa.
You said in your previous letter, "The clouds are gone. The sun is coming out. Flowers are blossoming at our apartment. The whole building is immersed in the fragrance of our flowers. The flowers are blossoming for Mom. They are welcoming Mom home. Together let's get ready for the beautiful future!"
Together with my letter, I send you my best wishes for you!
Please give my regards to others in the family!
Finally, I wish your dreams come true!