Keep Righteous Thoughts When Experiencing Sickness Karma
(Clearwisdom.net) Master said,
"There is a transition at the lowest level of cultivation practice, and this is to purify your body completely."
"You do not need to practice such low-level things, and we will push you beyond it, making your body reach a state free of any illness." ("Lecture One," Zhuan Falun)
I have always believed that Dafa cultivators have no illnesses and held the mindset that my righteous thoughts were pretty strong in this regard. However, during a recent period of sickness karma, I had a hard time. I want to write down this experience in hopes that it can be of reference to other practitioners who are experiencing sickness karma.
It started in the first month of last year (based on the Chinese lunar calendar). One day, I took a bath in a spa and prepared to wash my hair. Just as I put shampoo on my hair, before I had time to rinse it off, a relative called me to hurry and help her take a bath. So, I went to help her. When I had time to wash my hair, I found that the shampoo had already dried. The next day, red, swollen spots appeared on my head and the skin started to peel off. I did not pay much attention to it, but this situation has now lasted for over one year.
Before the New Year, I went to a salon to have my hair done. The hairstylist saw the swollen spots on my head and also noticed a blister on the back of my head. She told me to go to see a doctor as soon as possible. She said that she had a relative who also had a blister in the same area, and spent a lot of money in medical treatment and also stayed in the hospital for a long time before recovering.
Four or five days later, I found that the blister had grown rapidly, making it difficult to comb my hair. In the meantime, many red spots appeared on my forehead, nose, limbs, and torso. Only my face, hands, and feet did not have the spots. The spots grew very rapidly. They looked like burns from hot water. At the same time, the red, swollen areas on my head were heavily covered by something like scalp and they all became connected. I was concerned. I hurriedly went to wash my hair. When that stuff was washed away, it formed again rapidly in no more than half a day. Furthermore, it peeled off as quickly as it formed. In this way, several layers would peel off every day. My family members became scared and tried to persuade me to see a doctor. I refused, as I firmly believed that these were manifestations due to persecution by evil forces. Master would not arrange such a tribulation for me, because I believed that it would greatly tarnish the image of Dafa disciples. I then spent much time in sending righteous thoughts toward the interfering evil factors.
"Everything that ordinary people seek; everything that ordinary people want to gain; everything that ordinary people act on, say, and do--all of this is, for you, what needs to be cultivated away. But, since you still need to remain among ordinary people until your cultivation meets with Consummation, you have to reach a state in which you have such things but have no heart for them, in which you can do such things but without attachment." ("Fa Teaching Given in Manhattan" March 26, 2006)
I had to admit that I had not achieved the state of "do such things but without attachment." I did not have compassion either. What I had was hatred of the evil factors. Compassion is the power of righteous gods. If I had thought while sending righteous thoughts that the old forces had been using this to ruin sentient beings, rather than that they were persecuting me; if I had held the mindset of offering the sentient beings salvation when eliminating the evil forces, the outcome would have been perhaps quite different.
Two months passed and still no improvement. People asked, "What is wrong with your head? Have you seen a doctor? How could you get better without seeing a doctor?" In this way, I had not cultivated away the human mentality that Master wanted me to let go of, and instead, I was trapped in these attachments. I suffered much from this interference. I wiped the affected skin with alcohol or banana peel as if it were the last straw. At that time, I did not have any righteous thoughts, and my xinxing had already dropped to the realm of ordinary people.
"When your righteous thoughts are inadequate and not in line with the Fa, you will be cut off from the Fa's power, and it will seem like you are alone and getting no help. Even if the things you are doing are Dafa things, you still have to conform to the Fa or else the Fa's power will not be there." ("Fa Teaching Given in Manhattan" March 26, 2006)
I felt worried and helpless, and I felt at a loss. In the end, I cried and kneeled in front of Master's photo, saying, "Master, with this thing I do not feel itchiness or pain. It has gone on for so long. It would be better if it were itchy and painful, so it could go away quickly." Ever since then, I felt restless and agitated.
One week later, I told my situation to a fellow practitioner, who said, "You asked for the itch. No matter what ordinary people say, your mind should not be moved. Let them look. What are you afraid of?" I felt that the fellow practitioner's words made sense. I had not acted correctly; I had paid too much attention to my image and to how ordinary people look at me. With these attachments, I had been moved by ordinary people's mentalities, which had made things worse.
I went onto the Minghui website to read fellow practitioners' articles. I noticed that a practitioner cited a part of Master's Fa,
"Once you upgrade your xinxing, your body will undergo a great change. Upon xinxing improvement, the matter in your body is guaranteed to transform." ("Lecture One," Zhuan Falun)
Reading this I realized that it was time for me to improve my xinxing. I calmed down and studied the Fa intensively. I realized that there is nothing accidental on a Dafa practitioner's cultivation path and everything is related to cultivation.
Master told us that all the things that a cultivator encounters are good things. Why had I taken it as something bad? I had been using my human mentality to look at things. I also understood that I had already dropped to the level of ordinary people in this very aspect that I had been attached to. What had been stirred up were my human attachments, which were to be eliminated during cultivation. Master said,
"and it is precisely your managing to eliminate those attachments rooted in your human thinking as you cultivate that counts as important." ("Fa Teaching Given in Manhattan")
I came to understand that we should achieve the state, as Master has told us, that we take all praise and all tribulations as tests. We are Fa-rectification period Dafa disciples and should always keep a compassionate mind as compassion is the power of righteous gods. When one always keeps a compassionate mind, one's righteous thoughts will naturally be strong, so one will not stray from the Fa, will be less likely to take detours in cultivation, and will be able to break through any barriers. While studying the Fa, I forgot the things that covered my body. Four or five days later, after taking a bath, I was surprised to find that my skin was as smooth and shiny as ever.
"...since as cultivators you know that everything you do in society right now, including in your own personal life, falls within the realm of cultivation, then even more so should you take seriously everything that unfolds around you, and take more seriously this formless form of cultivation that you do."
"Then it becomes a matter of Dafa disciples figuring out how to best utilize this form that we have, and that is what amounts to walking this cultivation path well." ("Fa Teaching Given in Manhattan")
Let's alert each other, keep strong righteous thoughts, and use our righteous thoughts in everything that has happened around us.