(Clearwisdom.net) I became a Dafa practitioner after the persecution started on July 20,1999. I was only about 10 years old then. Five years later, I still remember the day I obtained the Fa like it was yesterday. That day, my father put the book Zhuan Falun on my table and asked me to read it. I picked up the book and started reading it carefully. I was still quite young so I couldn't fully understand some parts of the text. But somehow there was a force that pushed me to read it through attentively. Shortly afterwards, my mother taught me the five sets of exercises. When I practiced the second exercise, which required me to raise my arms, I felt as if something as heavy as a thousand pounds was sitting on my arms. It hurt so much that I felt my arms would break. I couldn't help groaning with pain. My mother stood at my side and kept encouraging me. She asked Teacher to help me, and I was able to finish the first four exercises. As I did the exercises, I could feel a rush of warmth flow through my body and experienced energy passing through my body.
During the summer vacation after the fifth grade, I carefully and neatly transcribed a copy of Zhuan Falun. Since early this year, I have been memorizing Zhuan Falun. So far, I have recited the whole book once.
After I started practicing Falun Gong, I encountered all kinds of xinxing tests. While I might have stumbled in some tests, I gradually identified many of my attachments and tried very hard to eliminate them.
For example, at school, whenever other students got better grades than me or received praise for incomplete answers to the teacher's questions, I would feel it was unfair. Whenever I did better than others, I would feel happy and wanted to tell everyone about it. Through studying the Fa, I realized that I had the attachment of jealousy, which is very bad.
My mood used to change with my grades. I realized that this was caused by my attachments and reflected my competitive mentality, the mentality of showing off, and self-absorption. I was immersed in society's bad influences. Every day I was told that in order to have a better life, I needed to study hard, get good grades, and go to a prestigious school to build a good foundation for a better future. Gradually, I was polluted by these competitive notions. In order to realize my "dream," I kept trying to use ordinary ways.
Teacher's Fa explains clearly that unless a person cultivates, that person's life is arranged by divine beings. If we fight for something that does not belong to us, we will lose de (virtue, merit). Just like Teacher said in Zhuan Falun:
"...as a practitioner should follow the course of nature. If something is yours, you will not lose it. If something is not yours, you will not have it even if you fight for it."
and
"Ordinary people have their pursuits, and we don't seek them. As for what ordinary people have, we also aren't interested. Yet what we have is something that ordinary people cannot obtain, even if they want to."
Through continued Fa study, I enlightened to many Fa principles. Even if I didn't do well in one test, I would face it with a calm mind. Miraculously, in the first year of junior high school, my grades improved a lot and I jumped from around 100th to one of the top 10 students in the whole sixth grade. It was just like Teacher told us many times "...attaining naturally without pursuit."
When school first started, I was constantly fighting with the girl who sat next to me. At first, I couldn't use the Fa to judge the situation or to look inward. I blamed her for the conflicts and believed that I hadn't done anything wrong. Later, after I read Zhuan Falun and Teacher's other lectures, I understood what had happened. Teacher said in Zhuan Falun:
"Accordingly, in your future cultivation practice you will run into all kinds of tribulations. How can you practice cultivation without these hardships? If everyone is good to one another without conflicts of interest or interference from the human mind, how can your xinxing make progress by your only sitting there? That is impossible. One must truly temper and upgrade oneself through actual practice."
I realized that, as a practitioner, I needed to be able to endure, tolerate, and to have self-control and self-restraint. Otherwise, how could I be more compassionate, or elevate myself? I needed to look inward and be tolerant of others. If I always treated others with a kind heart, was considerate of others, and if I had a pure and selfless mind, would I still have fights like these? After this enlightenment, my dislike and hatred of her disappeared without a trace. I apologized to her, and we became good friends.
I have loved reading since I was a very young child. Reading different books helped broaden my horizons and increased my knowledge. However, it also had a downside in cultivation. When I read fiction, I was strongly attracted to the stories and would read them for hours without eating or sleeping. Even when I practiced exercises, I would think about the plots. Sometimes I was so caught up in the emotions stirred up by the great achievements of the emperors, generals, ministers, and virtuous people of high caliber in the books that I would devise an idealistic "blueprint" for them in my mind. Every day, I indulged in this and could not concentrate very well when studying the Fa, practicing exercises, or sending righteous thoughts. Through Fa study, I realized that no matter how glorious the great achievements depicted in the books were, they still belonged to everyday society. They're not on a par with Dafa's level. A hundred years of hegemony, world honor, wealth, and high rank are like clouds and smoke passing by. Only cultivation can offer real freedom and salvation from pain. Only cultivation can lead to a truly happy and glorious future.
I never watch TV. But for some time, I loved to play computer games. Games are used to satisfy people's desires since people get excited when they play them. Playing computer games is also an attachment and is not good for my cultivation. I need to control myself and get rid of this attachment as soon as possible.
I often write truth clarification phrases on paper money (yuan). One time, I handed several bills covered with these phrases to a cashier. She saw them and read them out loud. At first I felt a little uneasy about it. Then I calmed down and started to send righteous thoughts. I said to her in my mind: "The truth is good for you. You should understand and accept it." She finished reading the phrases and put the bills in the cash drawer. It seemed that none of the people around her had heard anything. At that moment, I experienced Dafa's power. This experience helped to eliminate my fear. I also learned that we need to have rationality and wisdom and be able to use different methods in order to validate the Fa well.
Looking back at my cultivation path over the past several years, as I grow older, my rationality has increased. In school and in everyday life, through conflicts and xinxing tests, I gradually identified areas that did not conform to Dafa's principles. I try hard to rectify myself, assimilate to the characteristics of the universe (Truthfulness-Compassion-Forbearance), and to elevate myself to higher levels.
My understanding is limited. Fellow practitioners, please kindly point out anything improper.
