(Clearwisdom.net) I started practicing Falun Gong after 2002. I would like to share my experience of obtaining the Fa and the past five years of cultivation, assisting Master in Fa-rectification.
Finally, I obtained the Fa
Early in 1997, a local friend told my husband and I about a new practice called Falun Gong. Several days later, my husband brought home a copy of the book China Falun Gong. At the end of 1998, while I was pregnant and close to my due date, another friend introduced my husband to Falun Gong. He easily accepted it and read the book. I had trouble during the baby's delivery in early 1999. But surprisingly, my child and I did very well. Now that I recall, I believe it was because my husband had read the book and Master had begun taking care of us. My baby was tiny, but healthy.
During the first month after the birth, my husband read Zhuan Falun next to our child. He enjoyed it so much it made me want to read it, too. My husband said, "Go ahead, read it. It will be good for you." I read it and found many of the principles easy to understand and very righteous.
Not long after that, my husband went to work in the south and took the book with him. I was busy taking care of our child. That summer--1999--the brutal persecution started. The TV, radio and newspapers continually broadcast slanderous news and articles. I was scared and worried for my husband's safety. I called him and told him. He was too busy to watch TV. I asked him to be careful and keep his book safe. I felt this persecution was different and hoped it would end soon.
When I shopped to prepare for the upcoming 1999 Chinese New Year holiday, I witnessed the fearlessness of the practitioners who were arrested. I was touched. These days, people are driven by money and material gains. Who else would be so persistent in upholding the truth they believe in?
I shed tears for the practitioners' determination and really thought about this. It made me want to understand what Falun Gong really was, and what kind of force made these practitioners want to practice Falun Gong, no matter what. Did Falun Gong really have this irresistible power? I wished I could ask my Falun Gong friends about all of this. But due to the Cultural Revolution-like persecution, all the practitioners I knew had been arrested, sent to forced labor camp, or left home to avoid further persecution after having gone to Beijing to appeal for Dafa.
Close to the 2002 New Year, many of my practitioner friends gradually returned to their hometown. I finally got an opportunity to learn more about Falun Gong.
From their conversations with me and being around them, I came to understand that Falun Gong is great. Later, a friend (Practitioner A) gave me a hand-copied version of Hong Yin. I read it, and my determination to start cultivation was awakened, as if I had begun to understand what our benevolent Master wanted us to do.
In May 2002, I began to formally read Zhuan Falun. Having had the book for three years already, I finally read it once, thoroughly. Master says:
"I know the state of qigong all across the country, and I can say that right now, whether we're talking about inside China or abroad, I'm the only one who's really transmitting a practice that takes you to higher levels." (The First Talk, Zhuan Falun, 2003 translation version)
My lack of comprehension had clouded the meaning of this sentence for me for five years. Master says:
"Our Law Wheel protects you if you're a true cultivator. My roots are all deeply planted in the universe, and if someone could affect you, he could affect me, and to put it directly, he'd be able to affect the universe." (The First Talk, Zhuan Falun)
This sentence touched me deeply. I knew what Master said was true. I had never before heard any principles like this. Master used very simple words, but explained everything very thoroughly and clearly. I understood what I really wanted. This was the truth I had looked for and pursued in my mind!
I have changed much since then. Many things in the human world cannot affect me anymore. I follow the Fa's standards and no longer fight and compete with others at work. I know that Master arranges everything along the cultivation path. Many grievances and conflicts no longer bother me because I understand those are for a reason and are to help me eliminate karma and improve. I am so fortunate to have obtained Dafa. Master's unlimited compassion makes me feel truly blessed. How fortunate I am to have been saved by Master!
Operating an informational materials production site is cultivation
When I met Practitioner A, who had just returned to town, he gave me an out-dated copy of "Minghui Weekly" and several individual pages. I learned what was happening in the outside world and got information about the progress of Fa-rectification. I wanted to read newer updates, but he told me that there was a lack of materials in our area and how difficult it was to get the materials. He could only bring back a few items when he returned from out of town, so the information was not timely or regular. I heard that the money to maintain the informational materials production site came from practitioners' savings.
We lacked resources, technology, and financial backing in our area to build a materials site. But if practitioners in other areas were able to establish the materials sites, we also should be able to. So many sentient beings were still ignorant of the truth and still deceived by lies--we should produce more materials to help them understand the truth. Although we did not have enough money, every practitioner wanted to do something to clarify the truth. We should form one body in the Fa. Everyone in my family is a practitioner although we obtained the Fa later, and the evildoers were not obviously targeting us. My home was therefore the most suitable location for a materials site. After my husband and I shared our thoughts, we realized that this was our mission.
We shared our thoughts with Practitioner A, and soon our site was operating. The practitioners in our area were able to read Minghui Weekly and Master's new lectures in a timely manner and new information enabled them to clarify the truth better. We were also able to read Master's lectures from before July 20, 1999. When we read Master's "Touring North America to Teach the Fa" in 2002, we understood the three things a Dafa practitioner in the Fa-rectification period should do.
Because my husband and I obtained the Fa late, we did not have a solid personal cultivation foundation. We often had arguments when operating the site, often blamed each other, and did not look inward during a conflict. Practitioner A thought our site was unsafe. He sometimes had complaints about us, too. To be responsible for Dafa and the one body, a year later, a more suitable veteran practitioner was found and the materials site was moved out of our home.
Moving the materials site upset my husband and me. Because the site had operated secretly, we could not share our thoughts with other practitioners and they did not know what we had been doing. They only felt we were not very diligent. My husband and I again sensed hardship but did not get depressed. Instead, we studied the Fa more. Because we no longer made materials, we used our time to study the Fa with fellow practitioners and shared thoughts and experiences from the perspective of the Fa. We distributed the materials in the surrounding villages, wrote posters, and clarified the truth. Because we studied the Fa more, we improved quickly in understanding the Fa principles. Each time Master gave a new lecture, we compared what we were doing with the Fa, to see if we had been in compliance with Master's requirements. We immediately corrected those areas in which we did not do well enough and shared our experiences with fellow practitioners. Our minds broadened. No longer were we stuck in conflicts with others and we were able to understand Practitioner A from his perspective. We also tried to harmonize things Practitioner A wanted to accomplish for the Fa.
A year later, at the end of 2004, I read the fifth chapter of the Nine Commentaries on the Communist Party and realized that the Fa-rectification had entered a new phase. Not long after, I read the entire Nine Commentaries and realized that we should distribute it to more people.
We shared our thoughts with Practitioner A and asked for more copies of the Nine Commentaries so that people could read it. Practitioner A said he was too busy. We were disappointed. After my husband and I shared our thoughts, we felt that it was normal for practitioners to be busy. But the Nine Commentaries allows sentient beings to better understand the evilness of the Chinese Communist Party (CCP). When sentient beings know the truth, they can understand and support Dafa practitioners, and the persecution will be over. As more and more practitioners stepped forward to clarify the truth, the amount of materials available did not meet the demand. We knew we should not always wait for and rely on others.
By then there were articles available from Minghui Weekly and from other material sites. We had thoughts of re-establishing our materials site. Practitioner B, with whom we shared our thoughts, supported us. We thus resumed operation of our site at the beginning of 2005. This truly came from a single thought. When you want to do something and have that thought, Master will arrange it for you. Our Master did it all. This time the operation was a complete secret, out of consideration that the original one body operation should not be interrupted. Right then, the network operation Practitioner A ran was not safe enough. He also refused to listen to other practitioners' input. We were just filling the gaps to supplement Practitioner A's operation. Once we re-established our materials site, we produced and distributed the Nine Commentaries on a massive scale.
Looking inward to keep one indestructible and harmonious body
Not long after, Master's new lecture "Teaching the Fa at the Western U.S. International Fa Conference" was published. Measuring ourselves against Master's lecture, we knew we were able to catch up with the progress of Master's Fa-rectification. We began feeling smug because we understood the Fa principles well. This showed our attachments to zealotry, to showing-off, and to self-validation. We should have shared our thoughts and understandings of Fa principles with Practitioner A to improve together and better harmonize the one body and do the three things well. But I did not initiate the discussion.
Soon it was the end of 2005. When sending materials to another practitioner we happened to see Practitioner A. They learned at that time about our materials site. Not longer after that, the supply of Minghui Weekly and some other materials that Practitioner A had provided us with stopped. Perhaps it was because Practitioner A thought we already had them. But he did not know that we could not get onto the Internet. We were beginners in handling technology and lacked finances. Other practitioners who were relying on us to get Minghui Weekly were unhappy when we could no longer supply them. We felt great pressure. But I thought my understanding was right and my actions were righteous, and I did not want to have any interactions with Practitioner A on producing materials. Our conflicts became more complicated. It affected other practitioners in our area as well.
The rift in our one body became bigger and deeper. Many practitioners said we were at a state of disunity. Then I read Master's lecture:
"Cultivation is about looking inside yourself. Whether you are right or wrong, you should examine yourself. Cultivation is about getting rid of human attachments. If you always reject reproaches and criticism, always point your fingers at others, and always refute others' disapproval and criticism, is that cultivating? How is that cultivating? You have grown used to focusing on other people's shortcomings, and never take examining your own self seriously. When others' cultivation one day meets with success, what about you? Isn't Master hoping that you are cultivating well? Why won't you accept criticism, and why do you keep focusing on other people? Why not cultivate inward and examine your own self?" ("Teaching the Fa in the City of Los Angeles")
Master pointed this out problem so earnestly. I knew this was about me, but my mentality of self-validation kept me from examining my faults. Even though I cultivated in the Fa, I blamed others and waited for others to change. My husband and I knew this was not right, but we failed to dig deeper in ourselves. For a period of time I felt sad seeing the disunity in our area. Lacking a harmonized environment, practitioners did not share experiences or study the Fa together. My husband and I slacked off as well. Emotions and lust grew. When we had technical issues, we chose to ask for help from other practitioners instead of from Practitioner A. Jealousy affected us, too.
I realized the old forces had taken advantage of our faults and created a gap in our unity to reach their goal. I had a hard time figuring out what I had done wrong, but I completely negated the old forces' arrangements. Even if I have attachments, I am still cultivating along the path Master arranges for me and do not allow the old forces to magnify my faults. I started eliminating my laziness, jealousy, lust, and other faults when I sent righteous thoughts. However, because I did not let go of my fundamental attachments, my xinxing was not raised. I saw few results, and things were not getting better. I could tell that the other practitioners were anxious but did not know what to do.
One day I was told that one of our practitioners had been arrested. I was shocked and regretful. I knew that the old forces had taken advantage of our attachments and separated us. During this last phase of Fa-rectification, the evil is still fierce. It is because we still have many faults that nourish the evil. If we eliminated our faults sooner and looked inward and were tolerant of others when facing conflicts, wouldn't the whole body be in better harmony? Wouldn't we do the three things better and save more people?
The arrest incident awakened practitioners. We exchanged our thoughts and understandings and discussed a rescue effort to strengthen the arrested practitioner with our righteous thoughts. We abandoned our attachments and could feel each others' pure, compassionate energy field. We made up our minds to walk well on the last leg of our journey, to play the role of a Dafa particle, and make our one body harmonious and indestructible.
After I returned home, my husband and I made up our minds to be more diligent, harmonize the family, study the Fa well, and do the three things well together. We will use a higher standard and overcome technical challenges. We will keep up with the pace of Master's Fa-rectification, do a better job clarifying the truth, and offer more sentient beings salvation. Cultivating in the Fa is the safest. The journey Master arranges is the most righteous. Only by accomplishing our mission will we be worthy of Master's benevolent and painstaking salvation.
I realized that practitioners who obtain the Fa at different times have different missions, different cultivation journeys, and different tests and tribulations. Each cultivation era reflects one's xinxing differently. We all will grow and improve.
I hope all fellow practitioners will abandon human notions and get rid of faults and not leave any regrets in this last cultivation phase. Let us walk well and walk righteously on the path and truly become selfless, considering others before ourselves, and reach Consummation and follow Master home!
Please point out anything inappropriate. Thank you, Master! Thank you, Fellow Practitioners! Heshi!
