Returning to My Real Self by Exposing My False Self
(Clearwisdom.net) Revered Master! Fellow practitioners!
It was during the period of severe persecution that I became a Falun Gong practitioner. In the process, I received guidance from Master that helped me recognize arrangements made by the old forces. I realized that my false self was made up of human ways and concepts set up by the old forces and that my real self is based on a practitioner's righteous thoughts and the Fa.
A few years back, a fellow practitioner who was responsible for downloading materials from the Internet was persecuted. As a result, we lost that capability in our local area. The ordinary people's view on this matter was that I should not try to do it, because there were more capable practitioners who could do it. However, righteous thinking indicates that the wish to depend on others is not in line with the Fa. When I decided to purchase a computer to put together truth-clarification materials, in a short time I had both the computer and a printer to do the job. A fellow practitioner brought a printer to me and taught me how to use it. It is clear to me that once my thoughts are righteous, Master will provide the support that is needed. Today the computer and the printer are still working.
Although downloading truth-clarification materials is a divine activity, at times I did it with human concepts. For example, I was worrying about getting caught or getting into trouble. It started out with a close relative of mine, who is not a practitioner, getting into trouble. I was fearful that the problem could be linked to me and I allowed fear to take control, so much so that I stopped all my downloading activity for a whole week. One day, when I was returning home from work, I was struck by a car door and broke my arm. I realized then that I should concentrate more on studying the Fa. Looking inward I found that it was my fear that caused this mishap. Master said in "Eliminate Your Last Attachment" in Essentials for Further Advancement II, "If you are not afraid, the factor that would make you afraid will cease to exist." Realizing this, I sent forth righteous thoughts and things began to change. Soon, the relative was out of trouble and my negative thoughts were gone.
I know that blaming others does not come from the real me. Many incidents can cause this. For example, I received a list of names of those who performed the three withdrawals (withdrawing from the Chinese Communist Party, the Communist Youth League, and the Young Pioneers), but the list was not clearly written; or fellow practitioners are unwilling to take up jobs that I think they should, or the way they did things does not fit my taste, etc. This particular attachment may also occur in the work place or in daily life. For example, a fellow worker makes an unpleasant remark, or someone is blocking our way. Now, I recognize that these incidents are opportunities to improve my character. As stated in "Zhuan Falun", "As a practitioner one should not fight back when being punched or insulted." We need to treat everyone with compassion. A person who complains is clearly not a practitioner. The real me does not complain. Master described an enlightened being this way in "Teaching the Fa at the 2002 Fa Conference in Philadelphia, U.S.A.," "So what's their state of mind? It's tolerance, an extremely immense tolerance, being able to accept other beings, and being able to truly think from other beings' perspectives." Thus, when we can tolerate others, there will be no more complaints or conflicts.
In the past, I was down on myself. When I made a mistake, I felt bad and regretful without knowing that what I should do is simply correct the mistake. As a practitioner, it is natural for us to do well sometimes and not so well at other times. In "Explaining the Fa During the 2003 Lantern Festival â€¨at the U.S. West Fa Conference," Master said, "If you've fallen don't just lie there, get up right away!" This teaching allows me to recognize that being regretful about a mistake is not part of my real self. If we fail to do something, just do it now. Don't spend our time on regrets. Of course, it is important to look inward to find out what attachment caused the mistake, and then let that attachment go.
The above is my understanding of how to remove attachments. I believe that the Fa has changed me significantly. By constantly studying the Fa, any attachment can be removed. Master and the Fa have illuminated the path for me and have given me the opportunity to distinguish my false self from my real self.
I am most grateful to Master for His guidance!
My level of understanding is limited. Please point out anything that is improper.